The diary of a bushy-haired girl with issues.
Day 1: Got accepted into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. SO excited and cannot wait to make new friends, using my natural beauty and perfectionist streak.
Day 2: Went to Diagon Alley, where I convinced Mum & Dad to purchase me a copy of Hogwarts: A History. Have started studying my books.
Day 3: Am on Chapter 14 of Transfiguration textbook. V. informative. However, accidentally turned owl into a desk with matching stapler.
Day 4: Gave Dad my old Muggle-made writing desk because the transfigured owl is lovely. But if it squawks? Then it's all Dad's.
Day 6: Tomorrow I take the train to school. My mantra - Hermione Granger DOES NOT make mistakes.
Day 7: Met Harry Potter and his red-haired dirty-nosed friend John Wot's-His-Name on the Hogwarts Express. He isn't as hunky-dory as everyone says, but on the contrary rather odd. And not as smart as I am.
A pudgy boy named Neville Longbottom immediately convinced me to look for his toad, Trevor. It must be my hair. I mean, obviously! He is a little less experienced in magic even though his gran is a witch, so it couldn't possibly be my intellect that's attracting him. And he's far too clumsy to be able to grab a peek at my skirt...Oh, wait.
Got sorted into Gryffindor. Lucky me! I hear it is better than Ravenclaw any day.
Day 8: Perfect time to show off. Sadly, everyone pays attention to Harry Potter. Just because he's a celebrity! Not that Ron Weasley (that's his name!) is getting any fame for befriending 'The Boy Who Lived,' but I think he is very separate from all of this. Would side with that pale boy Draco Malfoy, but he is a Slytherin and shrewd instead of smart. Ugh.
Day 10: First flying lesson. Damned be Harry Potter! I couldn't get my broom up and he had his in his hand in a second. Blasted brooms.
Day 11: Lavender Brown crying in the girl's bathroom. She says she has issues. Just because she's not smart enough is no reason to complain.
Draco Malfoy challenged that idiot Harry Potter to a dueling contest. Followed him and Ron, found out about a top-secret school plot that possibly involves You-Know-Who. I hope I don't get expelled for wandering about at night with two boys.
Day 12: Lavender still having issues. What - an - idiot.
Day 13: Parvati Patil crying in bathroom. Oh, let me guess, issues?
Day 14: Why can't I have issues?
Day 15: Charms class. Managed to make my feather levitate and Ron got mad at me. What's his bloody problem?
Finally had an issue. Cried in the stall of the girl's loo. Was going just great until mountain troll barged in. And then it was worse when Harry Potter and Ron Weasley arrived to save the day. V. outraged.
Then got saved by the two of them. V. happy and have now got friends over the issue of the mountain troll. Go me!
Day 17: Leaving for Christmas holidays.
Day 20: At home and working on my homework.
Day 22: Owl from Harry & Ron. Hoped for something, anything at all about Nicholas Flamel. They say they have found the Mirror of Erised and need me to translate some odd writing they found on it. What do I look, a walking translation web site? Oh, wait.
Owl to Mr. H. Potter & Mr. R. Weasley: Dear Harry & Ron,
Solved Erised mystery. It was written backwards, you twits!
Much love and Happy Christmas, Hermione
Day 26: Back at Hogwarts. V. tedious how the two dimwits didn't find anything out, even in the restricted section of the library. Then realized I had them looking in the wrong section.
Day 27: That's it. Am abandoning my start-of-term mantra. I'll just leave famous Harry Potter and his scar and sidekick to do for it. I told them to "just call me, if they needed a doffing-off."
Day 28: Parvati and Lavender cornered me in the Great Hall and asked if I was getting a big head. I told them, "No, of course not, I am Hermione Granger and am far above any such thing." Idiots - and gossips!
Day 29: Neville tripped in the library, where I was standing. Caught him looking upwards and told him off in a loud voice. Stalked back to common room and shrieked when I realized had large bug in my hair. Came back to library to apologize with a most stormy look upon my face. Then Lavender and Parvati dragged me to the girl's bathroom and demanded to know if I was PMSing.
Day 30: Harry came up with wild idea after Quidditch fiasco that Prof. Snape was out to get him. Just because he was flailing about on his broom and wailing...oh, and can't forget the enmity between Harry's father - is no reason to make me come up with a brilliant plan to lower my Potions marks.
Day 34: The boys badgered me until I threw up my hands and said that Snape was the enemy. Am going along with them for now but secretly am worried about them. Keeping St. Mungo's telephone number on hand at all times.