word to yo motha

"If nothing lasts forever, then what makes, then what makes, then what makes, love the exception?"

Oh Andre, you put it so well. What does make love last forever? How much does it cost and where can I buy said "forever-maker"? Whatever "it" is, it is needed for my alcohol supply on the weekends, so my friends and I can snatch up whatever snatch we can possibly snatch up before high school abandons us. With all this hopeful snatch snatching or pud pouncing going on, one might hope to find someone who sees them more than just a member of the opposite sex's genetalia.

High school relationships are often nothing more than a fuck buddy for the weekend, and last about as long. So what happens to poor little Timmy when he matures and wants a relationship based on mutual respect and romantic feelings? Well little Timmy gets fucked, figuratively and more than likely literally. Having almost little or no evidence to back my claim, I believe I can say that ALL high school girls are evil and have the maturity level of five year olds (maybe six on a good day).

It had just recently dawned on me that the coming of age female in high school loves drama. These minions of evil may say otherwise, but don't believe them for they are trying to deceive you... those sly bastards. They love drama as much as Howard Dean loves negative publicity. Sure it's degrading and may hurt their reputation a bit, but god dammit their name is getting out there for people to hear. And I guess in some way this is connected to being popular. Well beat me with a stick. I have no fucking clue how that works out, so if you do find logic in that please feel free to e-mail me because I am still having trouble grasping the concept.

Regardless of all the drama and immaturity, there are still a few girls who can pass for datable. Guys, pay attention here. If there is a girl who has very few or none of the problems listed here (unlikely) then snatch her up like you would the last piece of pizza at Round Table, cuz she's a keeper. If a girl can sit back and call her fellow members of the opposite sex stupid and mean it, then she's a winner in my book and should be in yours too.

Luckily I have found myself a girl like that and I love her to death. Almost as much as a grilled stuft burrito from Taco Bell. She's just like a guy, but has a vagina instead of a penis, a pair of tits, and a couple inches shorter than me. I left out the what would seem to be the obvious long hair difference, but all these god damn punker-emo kids have long hair now. Guys are starting to look like fucking greaser ass hippies. Read Devin's article for more on that. Anywho, I'm glad i found her, and I wouldn't trade her for anything (not even a GSB from T-Bell). But now if you will excuse me, I have to go find something that will take the sap off of this damn monitor. Peace.

Creativity fails me now,