Humorous Quotes:

  • A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't.
    --Rhonda Hansome
  • Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows.
    --Jennifer Unlimited
  • Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.
    --Caryn Leschen
  • I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.
    --Jennifer Unlimited
  • When I was young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for two years before they realized I actually had a hearing loss...and they called ME slow!
    --Kathy Buckley
  • Behind every successful woman...is a substantial amount of coffee.
    --Stephanie Piro
  • Behind every successful woman...is a basket of dirty laundry.
    --Sally Poe
  • A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says...What is this, a joke?
    --Unknown
  • You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything - even poverty - you can survive it.
    --Bill Cosby
  • A sense of humor is the lubricant of life's machinery.
    --Unknown
  • If you can look into the mirror without laughter, you have no sense of humor.
    --Unknown
  • All my humor is based upon destruction and despair. If the whole world was tranquil, without disease and violence, I'd be standing on the breadline right in back of J. Edgar Hoover.
    --Lenny Bruce US comedian, satirist, author
  • Humor is just another defense against the universe.
    --Mel Brooks
  • Happiness for the average person may be said to flow largely from common sense -- adapting one-self to circumstances -- and a sense of humor.
    --Beatrice Lillie (1898-1989) English comedienne
  • Humor is emotional chaos remembered in tranquility.
    --James Thurber
  • A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your step as you walk the tightrope of life
    --William Arthur Ward
  • A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs, jolted by every pebble in the road.
    --Henry Ward Beecher
  • Laughter sets the spirit free to move through even the most tragic of circumstances. It helps us shake our heads clear, get our feet back under us, restoring our sense of balance and purpose. Humor is integral to our peace of mind and to our ability to go beyond survival.
    --Captain Gerald Coffee POW in Vietnam for seven years
  • Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him.
    --Romain Gary
  • Optimism and humor are the grease and glue of life. Without both of them we would never have survived our captivity.
    --Philip Butler, Vietnam POW
  • Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he isn't. A sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is.
    --Horace Walpole English novelist