Orgasm Problems


 Many women experience problems achieving an orgasm. According to reports only 10-15 % women have infact experienced an orgasm. While some have never experienced orgasm, and some say they are not sure whether they have had an orgasm. The key to achieving an orgasm is the brain, which must be immersed in sexy thoughts. You have to concentrate on what you are doing instead of letting your mind float away to other things. Many factors can cause or be influencing many women's ability to achieve an orgasm.

A few of the factor are listed as under:
  • You may be afraid that you won't orgasm. So you don't even bother trying and end up completely repressing your sexual response.
  • One of the reasons is the physical factors, such as fatigue, if your body and mind are tired and you need rest.
  • Thinking too much as to whether you will have an orgasm or not or about how aroused you are or aren't, what your partner thinks of you, whether he can keep the movement going also makes it difficult to climax. You think too much, instead of focusing on the sensations of what's going on sexually.
  • The other factor can be the length of time since last orgasm. In order to reach climax it is important that you have regular sex. The more time that passes between sexual encounters, the harder it is for a woman to become aroused, and less likely to have an orgasm.
  • Pressure and tension also can be a cause. You might be afraid or ashamed of asking your partner to stimulate you the way it arouses you and as a result of which you end up being unsatisfied. Also you're afraid that if your partner concentrates on your pleasure only, you'll feel too much pressure to come, leaving you incapacitated sexually.
  • The other reason is if you rush into the act. Thus if you rush into sex with your partner, you're not leaving yourself enough time to get fully aroused to climax and your orgasm ends up getting pushed aside during sex.
  • The other factors hampering climax are the psychosocial factors, including mood, relation to partner, activity, expectations, and feelings about the experience.
  • Family, religious and moral values often shape beliefs about sex. You've always thought of sex as something dirty or something that you shouldn't enjoy. The guilt then gets in the way of your true enjoyment of the experience.
  • Low self confidence and feelings about self may be opposing efforts to feel good about sex. Some women are so ashamed of their body that they are just not comfortable while making love. And this is one factor why they don't enjoy sex and experience orgasm.
  • One of the factors is also the past trauma or past relationship which play an important role in relaxing yourself while making love and enjoying the whole experience.

Things that you can do to achieve a satisfying sexual experience

The key to achieve a satisfying climax is your mind and brain. You have to relax and focus completely on the sexual act. Now assuming that your doctor has ruled out medical reasons for an orgasm problem the following are the things that will help you and open the door to sexual satisfaction and pleasure.

Communication: Communication is very important because you know your body and you know what stimulates and turns you on. Therefore you must speak up. You must guide your partner so that he knows what you like and this will help you experience orgasm. Also get in the habit of talking about all facets of your relationship with one another. Unresolved conflicts can put the damper on sex and orgasm.

Let go of all your inhibitions:
Fear, embarrassment, shyness, mental block etc, all these factor keep you away from having an orgasm. Thus you have to have to keep your mind clear and open and enjoy sex instead depriving yourself of this pleasure.

Know your body:
You have to be sufficiently aroused to reach orgasm, and to get sufficiently aroused, you need to know what makes you feel good. The best way to find out is to explore your body. To start, set aside 20 minutes when you know that you won't be interrupted. Take a relaxing bath and then see yourself naked in a mirror. Put some lubricant on your finger and touch your private parts. Touch your vaginal lips, your clitoris and your vagina. Find out which areas are most sensitive and what kind of touch feels good. Thus practice touching yourself in ways that heighten your arousal to the point of orgasm.

Try new positions: Trying out new positions also help in achieving orgasm. To achieve an orgasm your g-spot needs stimulation and hence try a position that will stimulate this spot leading to an orgasm. Thus by trying a lot of different positions, you'll find the ones most likely to lead to orgasm.

NOTE: For some women, difficulty in experiencing orgasm is the result of physical problems, chemical or hormonal imbalance, drug side effects or even previous psychological trauma. Such situations may require more extensive sex therapy or treatment. Discuss your problems with your doctor or therapist.