Elisabeth sat huddled up in her room, on her single bed with the pink and white fluffy duvet that reminded her so much of home, and being a kid again.
Pink had always been her favourite colour- ever since she’d been very little- it had just suited her so, so much and she loved the way everything she had was pink. Being surrounded by pink was like the most beautiful thing ever; that’s why she tried to make sure everything she had was always pink, so that she could always feel beautiful.
But now the pink duvet did nothing for her; it was just a simple, shallow colour that couldn’t bring her any comfort or beauty at all. In fact, it symbolized all of the things she couldn’t have, and that made it all seem so much worse.
She’d been curled up in a little ball for a good 10… 15 minutes. She’d lost track of time. She’d just been crying so much because nothing had gone the way she’d wanted it to.
She’d had one chance and she’d blown it.
She really had not expected Becky to turn up that night; it had all been such a shock to her, and especially the way she’d found her… or rather, them. She knew that if Becky had not walked in at that moment, then the whole talk would have been so much better.
Now all that Becky thought of her was that she was a slut.
That she’d slept with Steve, and now that he was gone, she was sleeping with Paul.
And that wasn’t true at all! But how could she say that to Becky when she didn’t believe anything she said?! She was not a slut! She may be a terrible person, but one thing she was not was a slut.
She was still very much a virgin; her own person. She hadn’t grown up at all yet… she thought Becky would be able to tell that by just looking at her! But obviously not. Becky just believed what she wanted to believe.
Did that mean then that she didn’t want to make it up with her?! Surely, if she was willing to forgive and forget, she’d listen to Elisabeth’s story, and believe every word of it. But by showing she didn’t… did she even care?
It hurt Elisabeth a lot that Becky didn’t trust her. She had done some really hurtful things to her, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t sorry now.
Maybe because I lied to her once she thinks everything I say is just one big lie now, she thought to herself miserably, making herself cry even more.
That’s why she’d had to escape, had to run off. There was no point standing there arguing with Becky when she knew she was going to lose, and not be heard. Maybe it had been a little weak looking back at it, but she didn’t care anymore.
She gave up.
What was there left to do? Becky was never going to believe her- and how could she prove it to her? There was no way she could get out of this, and that was that. She’d screwed up big time.
Still- she had Paul. And Paul was the only good thing in her life at the minute, if she didn’t have him… thoughts of what Paul nearly did when he lost Clara came into her head. Yeah, that would be possible if I didn’t have Paul.
He’d tried to help her as she’d ran past him, but she just needed to be alone. She didn’t mean to push him away; she hoped he understood that.
But she’d been up here for a while now. No sign of anything happening downstairs; and Paul hadn’t come to see her.
What did that mean? What did that mean?!
Suddenly finding herself in a panic, her breaths began to get faster and more shaky, and she felt more tears drop down her face. Where is Paul? Where was he?!
Wrapping her arms around her tighter, she tried to stop how miserable she felt, but couldn’t succeed.
She was all alone…
… again.
Just then she heard her bedroom door, that she’d slammed in desperation, click open, and she jumped a little, and looked up at who it was.
Through wet eyes, on a tear-stricken face, she saw the two faces grinning happily at her, confusing all she felt inside, especially as the… was that… Becky?
What was going on?
She still clung tightly to herself as they approached her; her heart thumping away, but when she looked at Paul she felt safe again.
“Liz!” Becky said, happily, and she came and sat on the bed next to her.
Why was she smiling? What was going on?
“Come here,” Becky beckoned, gesturing a hug.
Elisabeth looked back perplexed, actually a little nervous, and she glanced up at Paul in disbelief to see what was going on. When he simply grinned and nodded at her, and she looked back at Becky, she could only see what she was dreaming for all this time.
But this had to be wrong. It had to be. This was… I mean… Becky hated her!
“Liz?” Becky questioned.
Again, Elisabeth just looked for confirmation from Paul, who again smiled even broader. “It’s okay,” he soothed.
It’s okay?
It’s… okay?
It was okay!!!
Elisabeth looked back at Becky, more tears coming now, but happy ones, and she opened her mouth to give her the biggest smile ever and sealed her amendment with Becky with a hug.
And as Becky hugged her back, Elisabeth just couldn’t believe it.
She must be dreaming. She must be.
“Liz, I’m so sorry,” Becky said, as she hugged her best friend. “I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you, I’m sorry I accused you of all of those things.”
She was sorry?!!
“Becky- no! I’m the one who should be sorry! I am so, so sorry for everything I’ve put you through! I made a stupid mistake, I never meant to hurt you…”
“It’s okay,” Becky smiled, glad they’d made it up. It felt good inside. “I know you didn’t.”
“B-B-W-W-” Elisabeth was still speechless by this turn around. She pulled back to look at Becky. “Why did you change your mind?”
Becky grinned, and tilted her head towards Paul. “Your fiancé here talked to me- made me see sense.”
Elisabeth immediately blushed red. Oh my God- Becky knew about that?!…
But she looked up at Paul anyway and gave him a real smile.
“Thankyou,” she gushed, and he just grinned back at her, glad she was happy, and that everything was back to normal… so much to speak.
“Oh my God Liiiiiiz!” Becky cried excitedly again, getting the attention back on her. “You’re getting married!”
Elisabeth blushed again; she was happy that Becky knew, but she also knew how enthusiastic she would get about this, and start planning everything!
“Not for a while yet, Becky,” she mumbled, not wanting them to get too ahead of themselves.
“But you’re still getting hitched!!” She squealed, eyes shining, and Paul laughed and came over and sat next to Elisabeth on the bed.
“I think you’re beginning to scare us Becky- you’re beginning to scare me, anyway!”
Elisabeth grinned up at him and pushed her hand into his, glad he was back at her side again.
“But it’s so exciting! It’s gonna be so cool! My best friend is getting married… wow.” She looked completely overwhelmed with it all!
“I’m still your… best friend, then?” Elisabeth asked, almost shyly.
“Ohhhh Liz- of course you are!” Becky laughed. “Okay, I’m gonna put all of this horrible Steve stuff behind us now: you’ve moved on- obviously!- and… and I’ll get over it. And as far as our friendship’s concerned, I accept you made a mistake and I’m not holding that against you.”
She was forgiving her?!
“Ohhh Becky, thankyou!!” Elisabeth cried, and went for a hug again, making both Becky and Paul laugh. “I promise, I promise I’ll never be like that again.”
“Hmmm, you better not be,” Paul nudged her.
Elisabeth turned back and grinned at him. “I’m more worried about you, actually!”
He looked at her in mock horror. “I would never cheat on you!”
“Yeah, but I can’t see you all the time, can I?” She teased, going back over to him for a cuddle. “With you travelling off around the world all the time!”
He laughed at her.
“What do you do, Paul?” Becky suddenly piped up, wondering what all this talk was about, and Elisabeth looked up at Paul nervously, but he just immediately replied,
“I’m in a band.”
Oh no, Elisabeth thought. How the hell is Becky going to react to this?!
Becky shot him a surprised, yet verging on impressed look.
“Really?! Is that what the guitar was for, then? Do you do clubs and stuff?”
Paul grinned at Elisabeth, and she grinned back, knowing it was something much, much more than that! The fact that it was on such a grander scale made Elisabeth giggle out loud- it was like this huge, amazing secret! Paul grinned back at her.
“Whaaaat?” Becky asked, suspiciously, eyeing the two of them.
“Yeah… really big clubs like CD:UK… Top of the Pops…” Elisabeth smiled.
“And arenas,” Paul pointed out, playing along.
“Ohhh yeah! Have you done Wembley, Paul?”
“A few times.”
“How delightful!”
“Guuuuys!” Becky complained loudly. “What are you talking about?!”
Elisabeth turned back to Becky and grinned proudly as she felt Paul wrap his arms around her from behind and rest his head with hers. “Have you heard of a1, Becky?”
Becky still looked bewildered. “a1? Yeah… a1 are…” She suddenly paused, and seemed to freeze as if the whole realisation had just rushed into her head and stopped everything.
She stared at Paul in a whole new light; staggered and absolutely stupefied. Elisabeth couldn’t help but giggle again- it was astounding to find out that Paul was a popstar!
“Oh my God you’re Paul a1!” She cried suddenly, breaking her daze. “Oh my God!”
Paul laughed. “Why- thankyou!”
Becky suddenly seemed to be in complete awe of him, and edged back a little, flustered. “W-W-W- Oh my God, Liiiiiiz! You’re getting married to a member of a1!!!”
“So you say!” Elisabeth laughed, thinking, it’s not a member of a1, it’s just Paul!
“Ohhhhhmyyyyygoddddd.”
“Maybe you’ll become Lib a1,” Paul suggested to Elisabeth in her ear, and she grinned at him, as they continued to be completely content against Becky’s dumbfoundedness.
“Hmmm… maybe! Do I have to join, then?”
“Nah, Ben’s the girl.”
“Oh, okay.”
“Oh my God you know Ben Adams!” Becky suddenly cried, even more amazement coming through.
Paul laughed. “Oh yeah- it’s such a honour. Every day I get to see his darling face.”
“This is too… I can’t believe this is true!” Becky cried, eyes still wide.
Elisabeth laughed. “Becky, calm down! It’s no big deal, it’s only Paul. You speak to him all the time!”
“Ohhhh godddd… how did I not notice?! How did I not tell?!!” She cried, amazed at her own stupidity.
“You didn’t recognise me, so I didn’t want to say,” Paul shrugged. “Besides, I hate fame.”
“He’s silly!” Elisabeth said, and laughed a little when Paul started nuzzling into her face in pretend resentfulness.
“I still don’t believe this,” Becky muttered to herself, but edged closer again. “… any of this… that you’re engaged, and that he’s in a1.”
“Hmmm, it’s a bit like a dream, isn’t it?” Elisabeth grinned happily at her.
Paul leant into her ear. “Like a fairytale,” he whispered.
“Have you the met the rest of the band, Liz?” Becky suddenly asked, and Elisabeth shook her head.
“I barely know their names! I haven’t even seen a picture of them!”
“Oh my God- you haven’t?!”
“I didn’t even know who a1 were til he played me… ummm… Caught In The Middle,” she said sheepishly, going red.
“Oh my God, I love that song! I love your new stuff!” Becky said to Paul, and then turned away in embarrassment, “I sound like a bloody fan,” she muttered.
Paul laughed. “It’s okay! I’m sure you’ll meet the others at some point.”
“Oh my God- I’m going to find a picture!” Becky suddenly announced, standing up, suddenly all excited about having a popstar in the house. “I’ll have a magazine somewhere! Liz- you have to see Ben! You’re marrying the wrong member, you know!”
“Hey!” Paul cried, taken aback, but Elisabeth laughed and nudged him gently to show Becky was only joking and that she wasn’t going to take it to heart!
Becky then disappeared out of the room, muttering along giddily to herself, trying to take it all in, going to fetch a photo of the elusive ‘a1’.
Elisabeth grinned up at Paul, enjoying a few moments alone with him and leant up to give him a quick kiss- how she savoured his gorgeous taste!
“Plllllease don’t go marrying Ben,” Paul warned her, “or Christian. he’ll make you fall madly in love with him or something. Mark’s okay- he’s just too annoying to like.”
“Awww!” Elisabeth laughed, poking him in defence of Mark. “Am sure he’s lovely.”
“Not as lovely as me!”
“Hmmm.” She giggled and rested her head on his chest. “Thankyou,” she added.
“What for?”
“Everything! Talking to Becky, making us friends again… you have no idea how happy that makes me!”
“I think I do,” he said fondly. “It radiates out of you.”
“But now everything’s just so perfect! I have so much to look forward to! Meeting your band- oh, and you are going to take me to see you perform- right?”
“Right!” He grinned.
“Yeah… and then of course, the wedding… and the honeymoon, and being your wife…” She looked up at him again to give him another kiss.
“You missed one thing out,” he pointed out to her.
“What’s that?”
“Your first time,” he grinned at her, almost excitedly.
Ahhhh yes. That. She was still yet to give up her innocence, still yet to fully commit herself to Paul… that could only be done when she slept with him, slept with someone for the first time…
Question was: when was she going to do it?
~hehe, thought I’d do a little note down here for once! Lol! well, technically that’s ‘the end’ of the first time, lol, buuuut… I can’t just end it there. That wld be mean! The next two chapters are epilogues of the fic- a part one, and a part two- I cldn’t just do one cos they’re from two separate times after this whole reunion scene. Anyways, they properly finish first time off, so am not gonna say anymore until u’ve read them! Nearly done nowwwww, lol. Kate xx~