Beep beep. Beep beep.
Chloe jumped and grabbed her phone off the
bedside table. Trust her to forget to turn the sound off. She looked at the
display:
- read
now?
Here we go, Chloe thought, her stomach lurching
in anticipation.
She pressed ‘OK’ and read the
message:
All
systems go.
Ready
when you
are.
(116)
Ahh, clever. She would never have thought to
send a cryptically disguised message. She’d just have put something idiotic
like, ‘Ben’s asleep, let’s shag’. Chloe smiled to herself and looked over to
Ben’s still form lying under the covers. Well he was definitely sound asleep
for her mobile not to have woken him up. Time to go then.
Surprisingly, it hadn’t taken too long for Ben
to fall asleep. The no sex tonight thing hadn’t gone down too well with him,
but then it hadn’t gone down too well with her! She sort of did
understand why Mark didn’t want her to sleep with Ben, but she was a bit miffed
that he’d actually asked her not to. She felt a bit indignant about it
actually, kinda like, what gave him the right to tell her who she could and
couldn’t sleep with. It wasn’t like she was sleeping with him, after
all. Even if she was, things only might be different. And plus, she
liked having sex with Ben, it was good sex, and she wasn’t gonna get any at all
today now. Hmph.
Feeling a bit grouchy, Chloe slipped out of bed
and started to walk across the room towards the door, but then stopped. Should
she put some more clothes on, or just go as she was? She wasn’t wearing very
much; her favourite deep purple satin night dress, which was very skimpy and
very short, and yes, it was the middle of January, but it made her feel almost
sexy, and unsurprisingly Ben liked it.
Chloe looked around the room. She couldn’t risk
going through her bag to find something more decent to put on, so her extensive
choice consisted of her knee-length fluffy winter coat, her jeans, her floaty
top, which was probably less substantial than what she currently had on, and
all of Ben’s clothes, which for some reason he’d felt the need to scatter all
over the floor as per usual. Well she’d feel stupid in any of those things, but
she’d feel naked going how she was. Looking back, she could hardly believe
she’d gone semi-skinny dipping with Mark! She must have been drunk or
something; she'd been nearly naked for God’s sake! Mind you, there was
something about Mark that just put her at ease; she felt totally comfortable
around him.
Oh, what the hell! She’d go as she was!
Shivering from the cold and the excitement,
Chloe carefully pulled the door open and looked out into the corridor to make
sure there was no-one around that would see her.
“Sorry baby.” She whispered, looking at Ben
still sleeping innocently with no idea what was going on right under his nose,
before stepping out of their room into the deserted corridor and pulling the
door shut behind her.
It was a good job Mark had mentioned which room
he was in because otherwise Chloe wouldn’t have had a clue where to find him!
Following the numbers on the doors lining the corridor, Chloe walked until she
got to the right room.
116.
There it was.
Knocking softly so as not to wake Paul, Chloe
waited for the door to be opened. There was a click and it swung inwards as
Mark pulled it. Chloe smiled at the surprised look on his face when he saw what
she was, or more accurately, wasn’t wearing. He didn’t look too bad
himself dressed only in a pair of loose trousers. Mmm… six pack…
“Gonna let me in?” Chloe asked, grinning at
Mark. “Getting cold out here.”
“I’m not surprised.” Mark said, smiling and
taking Chloe’s hands, pulling her into the room and pushing the door closed.
“You look beautiful.”
“So what do you have in store for me tonight,
Mr. Read?” Chloe asked, letting the compliment go as Mark ran his hands down
her back.
Whenever they were together he was always
touching her, almost like he couldn’t help himself. Chloe didn’t mind, though.
Mark touched her in a way that Ben never did.
“We can do anything you want.” He said,
kissing her slowly before moving his lips down her neck.
Chloe closed her eyes in pleasure and ran a
hand down Mark’s smooth chest, feeling every ripple of his toned muscles.
“I’m so glad you’re here.” Mark whispered in
Chloe’s ear.
“Mmm, me too.” Chloe murmured, trying to resist
the urge to rip all Mark’s clothes off and do things with him that she thought
she’d decided she didn’t want to do.
Chloe only vaguely registered that Mark was
slowly manoeuvring her over to the bed until she found herself being gently
pushed down, and realised that Mark was sort of half lying on top of her. She
knew what she was letting happen, but for some reason it wasn’t all linking up
properly in her head, and instead of stopping Mark from putting his hands exactly
where he wanted, Chloe was kissing him with as much passion as he was kissing
her. She knew deep down that if her and Mark slept together now it’d be a
mistake, but caught up in the heat of the moment, all she could think about was
how she had so much pent up energy inside her that if she didn’t sleep with someone
tonight she was going to go mad. And here was Mark, close at hand, very
close, and more than willing to help her out with that. How convenient.
She pulled Mark more closely against her and
let out a small sigh as their bare skin touched. Mark started to undo the
buttons at the top of Chloe’s nightdress, tracing a path down her chest with
his lips when a sudden rush of conscience almost brought Chloe back to her
senses.
“Mark, no…” she murmured, finding it
increasingly difficult to keep a level head, especially when Mark was peeling
the thin satin straps off her shoulders.
“Mark…” she said more forcefully, stopping the
hand that was creeping up her leg.
Mark stopped kissing her and looked at her.
“What’s wrong?”
“I don’t think this is a very good idea.” Chloe
said, trying not to sound out of breath.
God, she wanted him.
“Don’t you want to?” Mark asked, looking a bit
disappointed.
Chloe could feel the sexual tension between
them increasing by the second.
“No, I do, I think I do, but… well, we just
can’t. Especially not with Paul in the same room!”
“He’s asleep!” Mark said dismissively, kissing
Chloe again.
Paul wasn’t asleep and almost unable to believe
what he’d just heard. Desperately hoping that he was wrong in his recognition
of the voices, Paul cautiously opened one eye, and immediately screwed it back
up again in horror as he saw Mark and Chloe very definitely about to have sex
on the bed just metres away from the one he was lying in. His first concern was
that Chloe and Mark were going to have sex while he was in the room, but his
second and overall most urgent concern was that Chloe and Mark were
going to have sex while he was in the room. Not Chloe and Ben, or Mark and
someone else; Chloe and Mark.
Paul couldn’t believe it, he just couldn't
believe it. He knew there was something going on between them; he’d even
asked them about it, mistakenly thinking that they’d trust him enough to tell
him the truth, but he was clearly wrong because they’d both lied through their
teeth. And Chloe had had a go at him for telling lies.
Hypocrite.
But indignation aside, what did he do now?
Chloe and Mark clearly didn’t realise that he was awake, and so if he didn’t
let them know otherwise there was a good chance that they’d go all the way with
him right there and he’d have to listen to the whole thing. Eurgh, he couldn’t,
he’d be sick. He had to do something! But what? He wanted to get up and
jump out the window to stop himself being scarred for life, but he also knew he
had to stop what was about to happen between Chloe and Mark. He owed it to Ben
– he seemed to be the only person not telling him lies at the moment.
The fumbling going to between Chloe and Mark
sounded like it was getting more intense, and Paul knew he needed to do
something now.
“Mark, I don’t think this is such a good idea.”
Chloe murmured, unwittingly handing Paul the perfect cue.
Led by impulse, he threw the covers back and
sat up.
“No, nor do I.” He said.
Chloe and Mark both looked round at Paul, utter
disbelief on their faces.
Paul knew the feeling.
“Oh my God.” Chloe said, pushing Mark off her
and grabbing a pillow to hold in front of her.
“I… we… I thought you were asleep!” Mark said
with shock in his voice.
“I know.” Paul said.
“So you…”
“I heard everything.” Paul confirmed, gravely
surveying Chloe and Mark. “Speechless.” He said.
“Paul, please… don’t… this isn’t… it’s not…”
Chloe stammered. “Please don’t tell Ben.” She whispered finally, tears in her
eyes.
She looked terrified.
Well so she should, Paul thought. Bloody hell!
“Don’t tell Ben?!” he exclaimed. “What… oh
words escape me! I can’t believe we’re even in this situation!”
“Paul, mate, I know it looks bad…” Mark
started.
“Too right it looks bad! What the hell do you
two think you’re doing?”
“Oh God.” Chloe said, hiding her eyes with a
hand.
Paul felt bad because he knew she was crying,
but he was so angry with her for doing this to Ben. So angry with her for doing
this to him! How could she put him in this position again? What was he
meant to do now? Once again he was caught between his loyalties to two of his
friends. Once again, someone was going to end up hurt, and, once again,
regardless of what he did, he was probably going to come out of this worst off.
This wasn’t fair – he didn’t ask to get dragged into all this, not again! Once
was bad enough, but twice! Well, that was just bad luck, or in Paul’s case,
bloody sod’s law. Why was it always him? Why did everyone always have to suck
him into their sordid lives? Couldn’t they just let him get on with
concentrating on his own sordid life? As if dealing with one life wasn’t
enough.
Mark put his arm around Chloe, but she pushed
him away and got up off the bed, struggling to do up the buttons her nightdress
with shaking hands, silent tears escaping from her eyes.
“Clo…” Mark said, looking after her in
confusion.
“Someone gonna give me an explanation, or are
you just going to stand there?” Paul asked. “Or is it just me who thinks that
cheating on your boyfriend with his friend is a serious thing?”
He looked around at the blank faces staring
back at him.
“Would it be easier if I broke it down for you?
Or shall I go and get Ben’s side of things?” Paul asked, getting up off the bed
and making to go towards the door.
“No, Paul, please.” Chloe said. “I… I don’t
know what to say, or… where to start.”
“At the beginning might be an idea. How long
has this been going on?”
Chloe looked at Mark. “Um… I… I don’t know.”
“It’s only been about a week.” Mark said.
“Oh well that’s alright then. As long as you’ve
only been cheating on your boyfriend for a week we’ll forget all about it,
shall we? How could you? How could you do this to Ben?” Paul exclaimed,
looking at Chloe.
“It’s not her fault.” Mark said.
“Oh of course not. She’s totally blame free. It
takes two, Mark. You…” Paul shook his head at Mark in exasperation. “I
just… argh, you idiot!”
“You don’t understand.” Mark said.
“No, I don’t understand! What…” Paul trailed
off and sat down on the bed. “You know what? I don’t even have the words, and
quite frankly I don’t particularly want to talk to either of you right now. I
just want to go back to sleep and wake up in the morning and find out that this
was all a horrible nightmare, but doesn’t look like that’s possible. Which is just
great. I think it’d be a good idea if you went, Chloe.”
“Clo, you don’t have to.” Mark said as Chloe
turned towards the door.
“Why do you have to make it worse for
yourself?” Paul exclaimed. “Just go!”
Chloe left the room without a second glance,
while Mark regarded Paul with a wary expression.
Paul, however, was so angry he was having
trouble speaking. The only thought he was having was AAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
and the only thing he wanted to do was kill Mark. And Chloe, because it bloody
well was as much her fault as it was Mark’s. This whole thing was just beyond
Paul’s comprehension.
“Why did you have to do it, Mark?” he said.
“What?” Mark asked, looking puzzled.
“You couldn’t just leave things how they were,
could you? Couldn’t bear to grant Ben one little bit of happiness, is that it?
Do you know what you’ve done? Do you know what Ben will do when he finds out?”
“If he cares for Chloe at all he’ll be happy
she’s happy.” Mark said.
“Oh that’s right, silly me. He’ll be ecstatic
that you’ve stolen away the love of his life. He’ll send you flowers to thank
you.” Paul said sarcastically. “Like being in a1, do you? Enjoy being in the
band? I know that Chris does, I know that it’s all Ben’s ever wanted, and
believe it or not, sometimes I actually find it in myself to enjoy it too. Well
congratulations Mark, you’ve just put an end to all that. Aren’t you going to
be Mr. Popular?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You haven’t thought that far ahead, have you?
Okay, let’s play a little game, shall we? Let’s hope it gets some sense into
your pathetic excuse for a brain.”
“Don’t talk to-”
“I think you’d benefit from listening to me,
actually.” Paul said, cutting Mark off. “I presume you still think you have
these “feelings” for Chloe?”
“I don’t think anything. I love
her.”
“And that’s where you make your first mistake.”
Paul said, trying to clam the rage building up inside of him. “You don’t love
her! How can you? You only want her because you can’t have her. You wouldn’t
look twice at her if she was handed to you on a plate!”
“How can you say that?” Mark asked. “You have
no idea what I feel for Chloe, what we feel for each other.”
Paul let out a small laugh. “You don’t actually
think she feels the same, do you? Oh this just gets better and better.”
“She does have feelings for me.” Mark said.
“Yeah?” she gonna leave Ben for you?”
“We’ve talked about it.”
“And what did she say?”
“She said she wasn’t ready.” Mark said,
starting to look less sure of himself.
“Funny that.” Paul said, with what he hoped was
an infuriatingly smug smile. “So what exactly do you think is going to happen
when Ben finds out about this little affair? Will he, a) leave the band, b)
kick you out of the band, c) kill you, d) kill himself, or e) all of the
above?”
“You’re being a bit melodramatic, aren’t you?”
Mark asked.
“Oh, you think so?”
“Yeah, you’re being stupid.”
“Sounding pretty confident there. Confident
enough for me to tell Ben?” Paul asked.
“You wouldn’t”
“Really.”
“If Ben isn’t happy for Chloe then he’s just selfish.”
Mark said.
“Don’t you think you’re the selfish one for
trying to split Ben and Chloe up?”
“You make it sound like I’m doing it
maliciously!” Mark protested. “I’m not trying to split anyone up – I
can’t help how I feel!”
“Bollocks. Of course you can help it. You could
have started by not running your mouth off to Chloe.”
“Okay, fine. I know what I’m doing isn’t
exactly kosher, but I believe in this, and you know me Paul, I never do
anything wrong, certainly not like this, and I wouldn’t be doing this if I
didn’t think that ultimately it was the right thing to do.”
“Oh please.”
“No, listen. I love Chloe, more than you could
understand, and when we’re together it just feels so perfect. And I know it’s a
cliché, but it’s like the whole world slots into place when she’s standing next
to me. And the way we are together, it’s… it’s like we’re meant to be. It’s not
just wanting what I can’t have, and actually I’d like nothing more than for
Chloe to be handed to me on a plate. And you can be as cynical as you like, but
I feel it, and when I’m with her I know she feels it too. Paul, I think
she’s my soul mate.” Mark said earnestly. “If you found someone like that, are
you telling me that you wouldn’t do everything you could to get her?”
Paul was quiet for a minute while he took in
Mark’s little speech. He was a little taken aback by how sincerely Mark had
expressed his feelings. He had no idea Mark felt that strongly about
Chloe, but, ever the cynic, Paul felt a slight doubt that if Mark had actually
thought about the words he’d just poured from his heart before he’d said them,
written them down and looked at them, he’d have a little re-think about how
much he really meant them. In situations like this Paul found it was always
worth remembering that one of Mark’s secret ambitions was to be an actor, and
so taking everything he said dramatically with a large pinch of salt was
recommended.
“Are you her soul mate?” Paul asked
Mark.
“Is Ben if she’s with me?” Mark asked. “Paul,
believe me, I know it’s wrong, and I know it’ll hurt Ben, but… well someone’s
gotta lose.”
“Well you’ve said it all then.” Paul said, not
believing that was everything there was to be said at all, but fast losing the
will to live. “What can I tell you if you know it’s wrong but won’t stop what
you’re doing?”
“I can’t stop, Paul. I didn’t ask to fall in
love with Chloe, but I have done, and now I know how wonderful it is to be with
her, I can never be with anybody else if I can’t have her.”
Chloe quietly opened the door to her and Ben’s
room and slipped into the darkness. She felt weird. A bit light-headed, like
when you wake up after going to sleep for an hour in the middle of the day, and
her heart was pounding so fast she wondered if it was going to be too much to
take and she’d just collapse. Maybe she’d die. Well, she could only hope. She
was in a state of numb shock after what had happened. She’d kept playing it
back in her mind as she walked slowly down the corridor from Mark and Paul’s
room, back to where she was meant to be.
She couldn’t believe Paul had caught her and
Mark like that. It was just the most nightmarish scenario there could ever
possibly be in the whole world. It was hideous, she couldn’t think about it
without wanting to crawl under a stone. Oh to be an ant right now. She knew how
it must have looked to Paul, and there was so much she needed to say, things
she had to explain, questions that needed answering, but he’d looked so angry.
She’d never seen him that angry before; he was angrier then than he’d looked
after punching Mark. God, that seemed months ago. It seemed worlds ago, in
fact. Was she still living the same life now that she was only a week ago? It
certainly didn’t feel like it. Simple – complicated. Yeah, that’s the same. But
anyway, when Paul had told her to go, she’d thought it best to do as he said.
He’d never spoken to her like that before, and she hadn’t wanted to make it any
worse. If it could actually get worse, coz from where Chloe was standing, this
was officially classified as catastrophically bad.
She wondered what Paul and Mark were talking
about now, wondered what Mark was telling him. She hoped Paul wasn’t being too
hard on Mark, because regardless of who Mark thought was to blame, she felt
incredibly guilty about the whole incident. She felt a sense of responsibility
for what had happened, and although she couldn’t remember whose idea it was to
meet where they did tonight, she was sure all this was her fault. If she hadn’t
been dressed so inappropriately then Mark wouldn’t have had such an
uncontrollable urge to sleep with her right there and then, and if Mark hadn’t
suggested sex then she wouldn’t have been so careless.
She was so cross with herself for getting
carried away like that. She was seriously going to sleep with Mark; she’d been
totally ready to, she’d really wanted him, suddenly needed to be
that intimate with him. Which was so so wrong of her and she felt
ashamed at how she’d been behaving. She wasn’t some stupid giggly teenager –
she was supposed to be a mature, responsible adult for God’s sake! She’d shown
herself up, made herself look needy, desperate, and worst of all, easy.
Now Mark probably thought… well God knows what type of person he thought she
was now. She felt cheep, like a hooker.
But if Mark hadn’t told her not to sleep with
Ben, if she hadn’t taken any notice of him, then she wouldn’t have felt that
need so strongly, and wouldn’t have jumped into bed with the first guy who
showed her affection. So it was all Mark’s fault. Bloody Mark.
Ow, her head hurt, and all the thoughts
swirling round and round were making her feel dizzy. She still felt strange,
and… oh no, she recognised that feeling.
Moving swiftly towards the small ensuite, Chloe
fell to her knees in front of the immaculate white toilet not a moment too
soon. Trying to pull her hair out of the way, she retched emptily once, before
her stomach started to contract and all the guilt and confusion was being
expelled from her body. She let it happen because there was nothing she could
do to stop it, but tears came to her eyes because she hated being sick so much.
It felt like the punishment was never going to end, when she felt a comforting
hand on her back and another holding her hair back properly for her.
“It’s alright babe, I’m here.” Ben said soothingly
into her ear.
Chloe closed her eyes tighter and waited for
the horrible nausea to pass, while Ben continued to coax her through it. Once
she’d finished being sick, Ben helped her to her feet and got her a glass of
water before taking her over to the bed.
“Something didn’t agree with you.” He said,
stroking her arm gently. “You alright?”
Chloe nodded, her throat raw, with the taste of
vomit still lingering.
“Hey,” Ben said, winking at her. “Maybe you’re
pregnant!”
He always did know how to make her feel better…