“What?” Chloe asked, hardly believing she’d heard the woman correctly.
“You’re pregnant.” The woman repeated.
Chloe was silent. In the space of two words her whole world had just crashed and burned. She wanted to scream, “GET IT OUT OF ME!” but she didn’t. She wanted to cry about the fact that it wasn’t over yet, but she didn’t. She wanted to be sick at the thought that there was still a part of Mark inside of her, but she didn’t. She couldn’t do anything. She was so shocked and so disgusted that all she could do was sit there and stare blankly at the woman. And most of all, she didn’t want to look at Ben: she didn’t think she’d be able to bear the inevitable look on his face.
“A-are you sure?” Ben asked.
The woman gave him a disparaging look. “Yes, I am sure. In fact,” she looked at the piece of paper in front of her. “It’s probably about time you went along to the hospital to make sure everything’s okay with the baby.”
“But if it’s only a week old…” Ben started.
“Six weeks.” The woman said.
“What?” Chloe asked, looking up.
“You’re just over six weeks pregnant.”
Chloe stared at her open-mouthed.
“But it-” Ben stopped and looked at Chloe.
Chloe nodded, the confused relief acting like an anaesthetic on her brain.
“So…”
“It’s yours.”
“But- Oh my God.” Ben said.
“Now,” the woman said, completely oblivious to the situation in front of her. “If you take this form along to your local GP he’ll be able to make you an ultrasound appointment just to check that everything’s working like it should.” She said, proffering a sheet of paper to Chloe. “And I’ll also give you these,” She added, giving Ben a handful of leaflets. “They’re basic information leaflets about what happens next, the various implications, helpline numbers, etc etc. I take it neither of you have any other children?”
“Um, n-no.” Chloe said.
“Well then you should find them fairly useful – they’re specifically aimed at first time parents. Is there anything you’d like to ask?”
Chloe looked at Ben dazedly and then back to the woman.
“Um, no, thank you.” Chloe said, standing up and leaving the room in a state of suspension.
Once in the corridor, the closed door behind them, Chloe and Ben looked at each other.
“I’m gonna be a dad.” Ben said, not able to hide the smile.
“I-I’m gonna be a mum.” Chloe managed to say through the shock.
“I can’t believe it. Six weeks!”
“I know.”
“You okay?”
Chloe nodded slowly. “Yeah, I guess. I’m just a bit… surprised.”
“Come on, let’s get out of here, get some fresh air.” Ben suggested, leading the way down the now familiar corridor and out of the front doors.
“Well,” Chloe said as they walked out onto the grass. “That’s, um… unexpected.”
“Tell me what you’re thinking.” Ben said, stopping walking and looking at Chloe.
“Not a lot at the moment!”
“Are you happy? Are you angry? Worried? Scared? I need to know what you’re feeling.”
“I-I don’t know. I don’t think it’s sunk in yet.”
“Chloe,” Ben said, turning to face her, taking her hands in his. “Do you want this baby?” he asked earnestly.
Did she? Did she want a baby at 19? Did she want a baby when her future was so uncertain? Were her and Ben ready to bring a whole new life into this world and take care of it? Were they going to last long enough to look after it properly? Look at it another way: did she love Ben? Yes. Did Ben love her? Yes. Were his future prospects good? Yes. Was he promising her the world? Yes. Could he give it to her? Yes. Did he look more alive and excited right now than Chloe had seen him in months?
“Yes.” Chloe said. “Do you?”
Ben grinned. “Almost as much as I want you.”
“Ohhhh what do we do now?!” Chloe asked, smiling back.
“I do this.” Ben said, pulling Chloe into his arms. “And then we take it one day at a time.”
Safe in Ben’s arms, Chloe let the happiness flow through her body. It was amazing – in about eight months’ time she was going to be able to hold in her arms the thing that most girls dreamed about having one day. And yeah, it was sudden and unplanned, but she had the perfect guy, with Ben’s money they’d have the perfect house, and soon she’d have the baby to complete the set. Despite everything that had happened in the week that had been the worst of Chloe’s life, despite the fact that the memories were going to be hiding in the back of her mind for a long time and despite the fact that she knew, no matter how many “new starts” she had she’d never completely be able to forget, things didn’t seem half as bad when Ben was around. It wasn’t like she was okay, because she knew she wasn’t yet, but Ben knew what she needed and he was giving it to her without a second thought. He’d created the most perfect escape from everything that Chloe wished had never happened – yeah, she was running away from it; not “facing up to things and moving on” like the rulebook said, but it was what she’d been trying to do ever since it had happened, only this time she’d be hiding from the world with Ben. She was scared but she felt safe, and she wasn’t alone any more.
“I love you.” Chloe said, looking at Ben.
“Do you?”
She nodded. “Probably more than you know.”
“I love you too.” Ben said, smiling at her. “I have one question, though.”
“What?”
“How?”
“How what?”
“How are you pregnant?” Ben asked. “Aren’t we usually like, really careful?”
“Yeah, I know; I was thinking about that.”
“What was six weeks ago?”
“Um… what’s the date now?”
“9th.”
“Is it really?”
Ben nodded. “Yep.”
“God. Okay, so six weeks ago wassss…”
“Boxing day.” Ben said with a slight smile. “I know what happened.”
“What?” Chloe asked with reservation.
“Okay, do you remember, we went to a party in London and got hideously drunk, and they were giving out these weird party bags to people when they left; they had really stupid things in, including a condoms, and when we got back to mine at like, four in the morning, we were going round the flat finding “fun uses” for all the things in the party bags.”
“Ohhhh.” Chloe said, nodding along as Ben continued.
“And when it came to the condoms, you said that a fun thing to do with them would be to have sex using them, but then I said that what would be more fun than that would be blowing them up to make balloons.”
“But I didn’t agree, did I?” Chloe joined in. “Oh I remember: we compromised and blew up the condoms first, hung them from your front door – if I remember rightly - and then had sex.”
“Without the condoms.”
“Yeah.”
“Oh.” Ben smiled. “That’ll be how, then. Thank God for alcohol.”
“Do you really mean that?”
“I really do. I really want us to have this baby, Clo, and I want to live happily ever after with you in a gorgeous house with gorgeous things in it. Just us three, forever and ever.”
Chloe smiled. “I want that too. More than anything. Sometimes it’s like you can read my mind.”
“I can.” Ben said, taking her hand and starting to walk towards the car. “But only because you let me.”
“Do you think we’ll be okay?” Chloe asked as they got in and Ben started the engine.
“With the baby?”
“With everything.”
“I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I promise that I’ll look after you – and our baby.” Ben grinned. “I think we’re gonna be just fine.”
Paul pulled up outside Ben’s flat, still very glad to be back on home ground. He’d gone straight back to his apartment when he’d got back late last night, but when he’d woken up he’d remembered that he’d left some stuff at Ben’s flat and was just popping in quickly now to collect it. He locked the car and let himself in through the front door, walking up the corridor, pondering at the lights that were on.
“Ben?” came a shout from somewhere in the flat.
“Christian?” Paul shouted back in confusion.
“Paul?”
“What are you still doing here?” Paul asked, rounding the corner and seeing Christian walking across the room towards him.
“Um…” Christian paused. “I don’t know, actually. Ben left and I just… stayed.”
Paul smiled. It was good to be back.
“Well I think you can go home now, mate.”
“Really?”
“Yep. I think Ben’ll be with Chloe for a while yet.”
“Is it all sorted out? I’m sorry for not stopping Ben more effectively, but he’s quite big.”
“Ah, it’s alright. Turns out it was the best thing that could have happened.” Paul said.
“Can I know what happened, yet? Why Chloe left, and everything else.”
Paul thought. He supposed it’d be alright to tell Christian – he was totally trustworthy, was highly unlikely to overreact in any way shape or form, and it was all out in the open with Ben now. Plus, Chloe would never have to know that he’d told him.
“Alright, I suppose you better sit down.”
Christian did so, and Paul sat next to him.
“You know, erm, Chloe and Mark were sorta having a thing?” he started, wondering how far he’d have to go back for this to make sense to Christian.
Paul had lost track of how much Christian knew; he was so used to knowing everything.
“Yeah, I found out when Mark was trying to beat you up in the hotel room in Manchester.”
“Right. Well, Chloe tried to end it with Mark, but he wasn’t getting the message; kept hassling her, and so she went round to see him to tell him to leave her alone, and – are you sure you wanna hear this?”
“I dunno – do I?” Christian asked.
“Well, um…. Okay, well obviously I wasn’t there so I don’t know exactly what happened, but he– Mark raped Chloe.”
Paul looked at Chris and saw that his eyes were full of shock and incomprehension.
“What?” he asked. “Mark did?”
Paul nodded. “It’s a lot to take in, huh?”
“I just can’t believe it. I mean, I do believe it, but I can’t.”
Paul watched Christian process it all.
“When I found Chloe she was in pieces – literally falling apart in front of me. She looked so terrible, like she was dying, or something. I didn’t know what the hell had happened to her.”
“Oh God, poor Chloe.” Christian said. “So that’s why you didn’t want me to tell Mark.”
Paul nodded. “I don’t know what to do about that.”
“Mark?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh, I don’t know. Police?”
“Mm, I think that’s more Chloe’s decision.”
“Do you think she will report him?”
“I don’t know. Certainly not right now, but it’s so complicated – I mean, she knows Mark, we know Mark… I think a lot of it depends on Ben. You should have seen the difference in Chloe when he got there. She was so adamant about not wanting him to know, but by the end of it all she looked so much better. Sorta like Ben waved a magic wand and made it all better.”
“Did she tell him everything?”
“Yeah. Even about her seeing Mark behind his back.”
“How did he take that?”
“He said that he already knew.”
“He knew?!”
“Yeah, more or less. I sorta made myself scarce for the rest of the conversation, but they seemed fine when I left last night.”
Christian shook his head. “I don’t know how you cope with something like that.”
“Ben or Chloe?”
“Both! But especially Chloe – you just can’t imagine it. Well, I can’t.”
“I’ve never seen her so miserable – I think she was trying to be okay but it all got too much for her.”
“God, I’m not surprised! I just don’t know how you’d feel if something like that happened. I don’t know how you managed with it all, let alone Chloe!”
“Nah, it was-” Paul sighed. “It was horrible.” He admitted. “Truly the worst thing I’ve ever had to deal with in my whole life. I really don’t know how Chloe coped.”
“Me neither. I expect you helped a lot, though.”
Paul smiled. “She said I was her angel.” He shook his head. “She’s so damn brave. I think the worst of it’s over now, anyway. Thank God.”
“Yeah. Ben still with her?”
“I’d imagine so. I think he’ll probably stay with her for a while yet. Depending on how strong they are he might stay with her forever.”
“What – like not come back to London ever?”
“Well I know that Chloe won’t be coming anywhere near for a long time, and if Ben loves her enough – which I think he does – he won’t be coming back either.”
Christian nodded. “I think he does. So what about Mark?”
“Oh, I really don’t know what’s gonna happen with that. I am, however, fairly certain that I never want to see him again.”
“Yeah, I think I’m with you on that one.” Christian agreed.
“I think,” Paul said, standing up. “That is the end of a1.” He stopped to contemplate it and a smile spread over his face. “Fancy a drink?”
“Yeah, okay.” Christian said. “But just a quick one. We celebrating anything in particular?”
“Being unemployed.” Paul said. “Whoopee.”