Ok short announcement: Due to reasons beyond my control I have only one more Chap of this fic written (Ok so the reasons weren’t really beyond my control) but well as some of you know I was busy designing a new Chrissy website which took more of my time than I thought it would so you might only get one chap of this fic next week instead of the usual two but if I suddenly get a burst of inspiration and write another then you’ll get the usual two chaps ok (Am I making sense??)

Chapter Twenty-one

Tara watched unhappily as Chris handed over the electric guitar then pushed the money into the pocket of his jeans, he’d asked her to come shopping with him while Mark and Louise took the twins to the movies “Chris why did you just do that?” she asked

He fell into step with her “Do what?” he simpered

“Sell your guitar…you love your guitar”

He smiled on recalling all those times when he’d played some stupid song for her “I had to” he confessed as she linked arms with him “Why?” he pouted “I just had to that’s all” he told her.

Tara felt a little put out Chris use to tell her everything but ever since the summer and the accident he’d been really distant dealing with his own pain in his own way “Chris is everything okay?” she suddenly asked he stared at her “Yeah why?” she shrugged her slender shoulders “I just thought that’s all” he forced a smile “I just had to sell the guitar…I hardly play it no more” she didn’t believe him and he knew she didn’t believe him “Chris I ain’t going any further until you tell me what’s wrong!” she demanded and he stopped dead!

She watched him slowly turn to face her “Okay I’ll tell you…let’s go somewhere quiet I don’t want the whole damn world knowing” he said as he placed a hand on her arm and lead her to the nearest café.

~**~

Paul glanced at the tattoo on his right arm, up until now he’d managed to hide it from Gloria but she was now staring wide-eyed at it “Please tell me that ain’t what I think it is?” he side glanced the design then sighed “What this?” he smiled

“Yup”

“It’s just a little something I had done”

She took a few paces nearer to him and seized his arm “A little something…look at it” he fixed his eyes on the tattoo then sighed “Glo chill” he said calmly “Chill…you deface your arm and want me to chill?” he laughed “deface my arm Glo you know you really are something else” he said as he kissed the chubby cheek before grabbing a slice of toast and biting into it as he skipped through the door.

Tara smiled as he neared he was taking her ten pin bowling “Hey babe” he greeted her then placed his arm around her shoulder “How’s you day been?”

Tara sighed “Okay I spent it with Chris…how’s yours been?”

Paul glanced at her “Okay…you spent the day with Chris? How come?” he said suddenly his tone a little curt, which made Tara stare at him?

“He wanted me to come to the mall with him”

Paul stiffened a little “Why? Couldn’t he go on his own?”

“Paul what’s with the questions? I spent the day with a friend that’s all”

“Yeah well as long as that’s all he is”

Tara stopped walking and shrugged his arm from around her shoulder

“What? Are you trying to say there’s more to me and Chris?”

“No. Of course not…sorry babe”

“Paul Chris is my best guy friend I’m not going to dump him because you’re jealous!”

Paul shook his head in disagreement “I ain’t jealous babe…just a little concerned that’s all”

“Marazzi you were as jealous as hell…go on admit it?”

He held up both hands “Okay you’re right I was jealous but just a tiny bit okay” he admitted as he placed an arm around him again and they continued on to the bowling allay.

~**~

Chris opened the door to his sisters bedroom and stepped inside a frown on his face as Christmas neared they were both asleep no doubt both dreaming about the days ahead bending down he kissed them before pulling the covers over them and lifting the letters to Santa which Tara had helped them write, they’d been so excited as they rhymed off all the toys they wanted they both wanted Barbie dolls Barbie clothes for their dolls clothes for themselves there was a whole list of things they wanted “Jesus” thought Chris as he sat down and pushed his glasses further onto his face “You two are gonna need a whole goddamn sleigh to yourselves” he smiled his thoughts being interrupted by the sound of the phone.

It was his mother to check how they were and if they had enough money “Oh what do you think mom…the money you sent last week hardly covered the rent never mind all the other stuff…there’s bills and stuff waiting to be paid groceries to buy and now Christmas is coming up”

“I’ll sent you some more but it’s quite expensive down here motel rooms don’t come cheap”

“Yeah I know”

“Things will get better hon I promise just let’s get this damn year outa the way…do what you can about Christmas and tell the girls I love them and I’ll be home soon”

“Okay”

“Oh and Chris”

“Yeah?”

“I love you hon”

He smiled into the receiver “I love you to mom” she rang off minutes later leaving him listening to the dialling tone.

“Was that mom?” came a little voice

He glanced round to find Irma standing in the doorway “Yeah” he replied

“She ain’t coming home for Christmas is she?”

“I don’t think so”

“You wont leave us to will you Chris?”

He opened his arms taking the crying little form into them “No I wont leave you” he vowed as he kissed the top of her head.

~**~

Tara was on the phone to Hayley “It might be nothing Taz” Hayley said as she fiddled around with the cord “It ain’t nothing Haylz Paul just didn’t want to be there” Hayley glanced across to where Lou sat “Are you sure? You know how sensitive you are…Maybe you’re just reading too much into it?” Tara rolled her eyes “He kept looking at his watch for Fuck sake” Hayley’s eyes widened “Oh I see” she replied Tara swallowed “See you even think he isn’t that interested” Hayley frowned “I didn’t say that”

“You didn’t have to!” Tara was so incensed she slammed down the receiver then flew from the bed Chris would listen he’d understand.

Chris took his time in answering the door and Tara had to duck the baseball bat aimed at her head “Wow…I thought we’d moved on from the cavemen days” she laughed as she past by Chris smiled contentedly as he watched her enter the den “Well do come in” he said tiredly then closed and locked the door.

Tara was already lying on the sofa finishing the potato chips Chris had been munching into “Help yourself” he said as sarcastic as ever Tara looked over the back of the sofa “I will…you know what’s yours is mine” he smiled then came to lie next to her “So what’s up?” she stared at him “What make’s you think something’s wrong” he glanced at her then sat down “Well why else would you be here at almost 1am?”

Tara glanced at her watch “Oh shit! Sorry”

“It’s okay…now are you gonna tell me what’s wrong?”

“Paul”

“Marazzi” Chris tensed “What’s he done?”

“Nothing well no that ain’t really true…I just don’t think he’s as interested in me as I am in him”

Chris frowned “Oh why what’s he said?”

“It ain’t what he said more what he did”

“What’s that then?”

“All through our date he kept looking at his watch”

Chris sniggered and Tara slapped his leg “It’s not funny”

“Maybe he just had to be home by a certain time?”

“Oh puleese…this is Maz we’re talking about he don’t go home before midnight”

“Yeah well maybe he just had somewhere to be”

Tara glanced at him “What? Like where?” she asked he shrugged

“I don’t know”

“You must”

“I don’t it was a suggestion that’s all”

“Chris you don’t think Maz would just use me would you?”

Chris looked thoughtful “Use you?”

“Yeah you know for sex?”

Chris tried hard to keep his emotions in check “Tara you haven’t?

“Haven’t what?”

“You know?”

He was embarrassed and she knew it “Know what?”

“Tara do I have to spell it out?”

“No!”

“No? I don’t have to spell it out?” he looked hopeful “Or no you ain’t well you know?”

“No I don’t know?” smiled Tara

“Taaaaaaaaaz!”

She stared at him then smiled “Whaaaaaaat?”

“Have you gone all the way with Marazzi?” there he’d said it

She gasped then hit him again “I’m not telling you that?” she laughed

“You have haven’t you?”

“What do you think?”

“Jesus you did didn’t you?”

“I might have”

Chris remained quiet which worried Tara “What’s up?” she asked he just stared at the Christmas tree “Chris talk to me?” she nudged he bowed his head “You’re angry that I went all the way with Maz aren’t you?”

“No!”

“Yes you are…Chris I know you you’re fizzing mad”

He bowed his head “No! I’m not” he fumed

“Okay you’re not” she smiled as she reached across and hit his arm playfully he hit her back and before she knew it he was holding her down and tickling her “I told you I ain’t ticklish” she squealed tears rolling down her face he laughed as she tried to fight him off both looking at each other she stopped squealing and he stopped laughing and before they knew it they were kissing.

Tara pushed him away then bolted from the couch her heart racing “I’m sorry…Tara I’m really sorry” Chris apologised as he went to her she pushed him away again “I…I gotta go” she muttered then walked slowly to the door.

~**~

Chris watched her leave his world just crumbling with each step “Great…I just blew it big time” he told himself as he sank dejectedly onto the couch “Fuck it” he said aloud “Fuck fuck fuuuuuuuck!” he cursed as he reached for the cushion “Stupid stupid stupid” he continued berating himself as he replayed the scene over and over again Tara had looked shocked or was that repulsed he wasn’t quite sure which one thing he did know he’d messed up big time.