The following are some parodies of prayers that I have invented in an effort to relieve the stress that yahoo games and chat place upon me when I am playing or chatting on Yahoo. Bear in mind that they are not an attempt to blaspheme but comic relief. It is hoped that you will take the spirit in which they are presented. These prayers make reference to ENIAC, essentially the electron computer ever made. It is now in the Smithsonian museum with parts of it in other museums around the United States. It was used to compute and develop ballistic firing tables for the Military. So at any rate here are my parodies.

Yahoo Lag Monster Exorcism

(Use this prayer when yahoo chats or games lags)

The power of ENIAC compels you! Be gone foul Yahoo Lag Monster! The Power of ENIAC compels you!

General Prayer

(Use the prayer when your computer or game is not going your way, or just for GP)

Hail ENIAC full of vacuum tubes, first art thou among computers. Holy ENIAC father of all computers, pray for our chips now and at the hour of their death. Reboot!

The ENIAC's prayer

(Use this prayer to help with yahoo games or chat)

Oh great ENIAC, hollowed be thy vacuum tubes.

Thy circuits be burnt at home as it is on the Internet.

Give us this day our daily bytes, and forgive us our curses as we curse our computers for crashing.

Lead us not into the dark neither regions of the Internet, but deliver us from Yahoo.

For thyn is the most powerless, the insecure, and the slowest forever. Reboot!

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