F A C T or F I C T I O N?
thought you knew everything there was to know about the murph, huh?
YOU WERE WRONG.
we have the REAL dirt!**

**alright alright - we're making it up again. meh. i'm easily amused... just play along, please? thanks, now that's a pal.


  • Back in his Blackpool days, Chris's hair was long enough to wear in a ponytail, or even braids, if he wanted.

  • Chris has plans to someday run for prime minister.

  • In recent times, Chris's hair sometimes reaches lengths that would allow him to put it in a ponytail, or even braids, if he wanted. [note: at time of press, it was still unknown if Chris wears ponytails or not. He has however been spotted wearing braids. Is there any need for that to be a public affair? yikes!]

  • Chris likes to fish.

  • Chris likes to eat fish.

  • Chris also likes to eat this, in disgustingly large amounts. Mmmm, tasty!

  • Chris choreographed the famed chair moves for that Backstreet Boys videos. You know the one.


    "Dammit Howie, it's swivel, turn back, step, step, and pick chair up!
    DO IT LIKE YOU MEAN IT!
    Now where'd Nick run off to, it's his turn..."


  • Chris has an evil pet gnome.

  • He also has an evil pet goat. Don't ask what makes goats evil, because I do not know.

  • Chris has appeared on Electric Circus. He can deny this convincingly, however, because he was one of the "window dancers", and no one ever really sees them...

  • Chris sleeps in a Hello Kitty nighty. Niiiice kitty! purrrrrr meow!

  • Although heard used in commercials by Mr. T of A-Team fame, Chris is believed to have originated the quote "I was born and raised in the ghetto, but the ghetto wasn't born and raised in me.".

  • On a related note, "I pity the foo'!" is a commonly used quote in Chris's vocabulary.

    i can grow one mean mullet, rocker boy!


  • It is widely known that Chris admits to 'borrowing' album art and video ideas from various graphic art books. What is lesser known is the book which has had the greatest impact on all aspects of Chris's life. Click here to see it.

  • One of Chris's lesser-known highschool musical endeavors was Ham!, a Wham! cover band. When they tired of playing Wham! songs, three of the members left and went on to have an illustrious t.v. career with their new band, the Zit Remedy.

    Wheels! Joey! Snake! ...Chris?


  • If Chris doesn't ever actually get elected Prime Minister he said he will simply turn to a life of crime.



...and that's only just the beginning. more stuff (see: more made up crap) to come!

Have a Chris 'secret' that needs to be brought to the attention of the masses? Tell me! I'll put it up here, and credit it to you.



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