22 - Nominations are due and Scott tells everyone that he has a Villa in the South of France and they can all come and stay for a holiday. Mark and Zoe are nominated.
23 - Mark and Zoe take their nominations well and sit down with Scott and Nene to discuss why they voted for them. Scott keeps quiet but Nene accuses Mark of being an arrogant, lazy, self-centred Dick before bursting into tears.
24 - The public vote Zoe out of the house and nobody really gives a shit. Zoe leaves.
25 - Scott becomes the first housemate to have a wank. This footage goes down well with the Big Brother psychologist who proclaims that it gives us a true insight into the working of Scott's mind and brings out his true personality. In other words, he's a wanker.
26 - Big Brother sets the remaining three housemates the task of shifting 5000 tons of Elephant dung using only a Spoon. Scott is unsure but Mark is confident, claiming to have done something very similar when he was younger. They gamble 50% of the food budget.
27 - Completely out of the blue, Mark breaks down in tears and announces that he is leaving. He claims that it is because the dung-shifting task has brought back the painful memories of the Elephant incident from his childhood. Nene tries to persuade him to stay but Scott sits in a corner, rubbing his hands slyly. Mark decides to leave.
28 - With only two housemates remaining, the Elephant dung task proves impossible. They fail miserably and resort to getting extremely pissed on some vegetable wine, made by Nene from a couple of mouldy carrots she found in the Big Brother garden.
29 - Nominations are due for the final time. Scott asks Nene to marry him and she accepts. Unsurprisingly Scott nominates Nene to leave. Rather more surprisingly, so does Nene.
30 - When the nomination is announced, Nene graciously accepts defeat and proclaims that Scott is a worthy winner. As they are soon to marry, she also agrees to shag him. The event is broadcast live to the nation and is preceded by a speech from the Queen. Everyone in the Big Brother production crew breath a huge sigh of relief as viewing figures go through the roof. Scott takes his $70,000 and runs away to Hungry. Nobody, including Nene, ever sees him again.
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