Thursday 26 July 2001

From The Brain Of Tiny

Woken at ten to nine this morning after a four am bedtime. Eventually mnaged to roll myself out of bed. Had a bit of difficulty finding clothes to wear, the top I wanted to wear was no where to be found. So off I went in my search for my top. I emptied the ironing basket and pretty much looked in every nook and cranny I could think off, I gave up. So in my desperation I had a look in my cupboard for clothes I lifted up a jacket and there it was! My top! Under the jacket! What kind of idiot hangs a jacket over the top of a top!? Anyway I finished getting ready anmd decided it was about time I filled in my college forms. Once they were ready I decided to come online and try to get the latest From The Brain Of Tiny online before I went out, however I was rudely interuppted. "Who emptied the ironing basket?" squawked my mother "Gillian" came my reply (that'll teach her to use my mobile without asking!) "Your dad's ready lets go" mum said. Off went the comp, I picked up my college forms and asked for an envelope and stamp, now this confused the hell out of me, my dad said "what for?", so I told him" your not sending them away yet" " why not?" "we still have to discuss it" "What? then why has mum been harrassing me to get them filled out? Why have I been getting nagged at everyday to fill them out if I can't send them?" "your mother likes to nag". You can imagine the look on my face! Headed off to Coatbridge to bowl and go to Frankie and Bennies for lunch (family day!) Uninteresting fact: for those of you who watch the Simpsons, my mother bowls like Marge! After bowling (before we went for lunch) I decided to spend some of my pennies on the puggy's.I played one game where they GAVE  me a gun! ME!! BLOODY MARVELOUS! This game was the dogs bollocks. It could sense if you moved left, ducked moved right. However it could NOT sense if you did the Macarena. Then I discovered a machine in the corner that I hadn't played before so I put in my pound and guess what? Without out doing anything I won! Out of the machine came loads of ten pences! (a punds worth to be exact!) Every time I played it I got the same thing a pounds worth of ten pences! However I'm not going to argue! There was this other machine that you could use to send ring tones to your phone. Brilliant! I decided to get a ring tone, one that would show people how dignified and mature I am, one that would let people see that I mean business. I wanted a ring tone that would sum up all those things. Which one did I get? Bob The Builder of course! Now every time someone phones me Bob The Builder plays! Got back from Coatbridge at about half three and the phone was ringing but it stopped before I got to it. So I 1471'ed it, number with held. But for some reason I decided to try Iain (he's my friend that has been away in Australia for 5 weeks despite the fact I was sure he was back next week). It was him!! We decided to get together right away! Ten minutes after I hung up the phone I saw his little smiley face come towards me. He wasn't even tanned! I was dissappointed! After walking round the town (meeting a surprising amount of people that we hadn't sen for ages) we went back to his house. He started showing me things that were weird or cool that he had brought back with him. I have to admit I became very upset at the site of the Australian Coco Monkey from the front of Coco Pops. He looks crap! Seriously fucking crap! I mean you look at the Brittish version of Coco Monkey he is the height of primate cool! The Australian one looks crap seriously fucking shitty! I apologise to Australians reading this but its true and you know it! Another thing about Australian culture Iain informed me about were Pokeys! Apparently over there this means Puggys. Well my Australian friends over here it is something very VERY  different! However Iain did explain to me that there were some good things over there. He showed me (and let me taste) a cereal they have Nutri-Grain. We have this over here but it's not actually a cereal it's a breakfast bar with fruity shit covered by some wheaty stuff. Over there this is a cereal and it's damn good! Yummy!  Another thing Iain brought back was a bag of Willy Wonkas 'Oompas' these are a bit like our 'Tootie Fruities' but woth 'Oompa' writted on them! Iain was gutted when we got to my house and switched on Big Brother and he discovered that it was almost finished. Iain had a special privalage today tnat I'm sure you all will be jealous of (yeah right!!) he read my handwritten copies of yesterdays From The Brain Of Tiny and what I had done of todays before hand, an 'advanced preview' if you will! For those of you who are interested in what Iain brought me back from Australia here you go: Gift set of Davidoff Cool Water for women (including a nice sized bottle and little silver heart containing 'compact perfume') A little cuddly koala A kickass engraved lighter He's my bestestestestest friend in the world! Last night I was in pm with THE sexiest Scottish hunk before he goes offline for two weeks, I'll miss him loads and loads... thats what you asked me to say right Martin? :P When you read this it will be Friday and Big Brother's last day, your last chance to vote for Brian! Get on the blower! Win a free uhm bike if you call this totally non Big Borther related number - 09011 15 44 02 please note I lied that is a Big Brother number and it's tp vote Brain to win so you won't actually get a bike VOTEFORBRIANTOWINONTHATNUMBERUPTHERETHATACTUALLYHASNOTHINGTODOWITHWIN NININGABIKEBUTTHENWHOREALLYCARES....VOTEFORBRIAN