| "But let me be a lover in the Savage Garden with you, and the light that went out of life would come back in a great burst of glory. Out of mortal flesh I would pass into eternity. I would be one of you". The Queen of the Damned Part 1 - Paradise Lost My friend Chiara had written to me and invited me to spend the Carnival with her at Venice. I could stay with her at her aunt's old palazzo not far away from the famous Canale Grande. We could have a wonderful time there. There would be a lot of friends, parties, splendid balls. And did you ever see the magnificent masks and breathtaking fancy dresses displayed in the streets during the ten days of Carnival? All that sounded too wonderful and, of course, I was delighted and only too eager to accept the invitation. Did Chiara think I could bring along my new boyfriend? Tyler and I had been together then for about three months and still could not keep our hands off each other. I had fallen in love with Tyler the moment I had seen him. Eyes like the sky on a bright spring morning under a mop of unruly blond hair. And his laughter, his warm irresistible laughter! I wanted him so much to share this trip with me. "You want to bring along your boyfriend? No problem", Chiara wrote back. "The palazzo has plenty of rooms and you will not be the only guests. So all you have to do is come!" How I wish I had never accepted this invitation ... After a plan crash you sometimes hear those stories about people who had a sense of foreboding, who for apparently no reason decided to cancel the flight thus escaping the catastrophe. Why didn't I have those presentments when I first laid eyes on "La Serenissima"? Instead, I felt an overwhelming happiness when we were approaching Venice from the sea in a so-called vaporetto. It was a very cold but sunny winter's day. I could feel the spray of sea water on my face and it almost took my breath away when the beautiful silhouette of the town emerged from the mist of the lagoon in the light of the late afternoon. Tyler was embracing me from behind, kissing my neck and whispering silly words in my ear. And then, our arrival at the palazzo! After we had reached Venice, we changed from the vaporetto to an old-fashioned gondola. These traditional boats are no longer a common means of transportation in Venice, but for tourists like us, naturally, a must. Our luggage was neatly piled up behind us in the back of the boot and we, wrapped up in warm plaids, were huddling closely, enjoying the ride. Oh, this was so romantic! On our way we were passing a number of magnificent palazzos, some apparently no longer inhabited with decaying grey facades, others still intact with wonderfully decorated walls, big flags with all sorts of ancient heraldry hanging down from the large windows. It was simply a dream! Tyler's mood was exuberant and he started kissing me passionately. Under the covers his hands were all over my body. "Hey, stop it!" I exclaimed, struggling for breath. "What will people think of us?" "Ah, fare la amore ... ," Tyler grinned. "In these surroundings I can think of nothing else!" and started to open first my coat and then my blouse. "You're incorrigible!" I laughed and gave in to his kisses. "Signori, we are here," the gondoliere finally interrupted us. Thank God, the ride didn't take longer or I don't know what would have happened in that boat! While Tyler and the gondoliere started unloading the luggage I could hastily fix my clothes just in time before Chiara opened the main door of the palazzo. "Bienvenuti - welcome!" she greeted us with a warm smile opening her arms to embrace us. "Oh Chiara, it's wonderful to see you again! And this is ... Tyler, " I said, still a little breathless from what had happened in the boat. "I am so glad that you could make it! My friends will be so happy to see you. But you still have time to make yourselves comfortable. Your rooms are already waiting for you. We meet the others in about an hour in a nearby restaurant, is that fine for you?" Time passed by quickly and it was already well after sunset when we left the palazzo - this time not from the waterside, but through narrow alleys and over little bridges with intricate wrought-iron railings. Suddenly, I realized I had forgotten my handbag. "No discussions. I have to get it. Please, do not wait for me. I'll get it quickly. If you describe me the rest of the way I can join you in a few minutes!" I had always believed to have good sense of orientation, but as soon as I had recovered my handbag from the palazzo I became lost in that labyrinth of old crumbling buildings, dark passages and convoluted alleyways. I had been so sure I would easily find the way back and now this! It was almost dark now. Only here and there a few street lamps shed a little light in the dim passages. Fog was slowly rising from the canals. Apparently, I had chosen the completely wrong direction as the sidewalks and bridges in that part of the town were almost completely deserted. "Now, don't panic, I said, trying to calm myself. I rested against a cold dark wall, trying to figure out what to do next. "If I could only get back to a larger square I would certainly find my way back then or at least come across some people I might ask ..." At that moment I heard a muffled sigh nearby. Startled I tried to recede even further into the shadows hoping that nobody would catch sight of me. "Now, what is this?" I wondered peering around the next corner and speculating whether it might be possible to escape in that direction. But that turned out to be a blind alley and all of a sudden I saw that there were two men, young men obviously, one of them with beautiful dark curls falling down on his shoulders, engaged in a most passionate embrace. "Run," I thought. "Run quickly! Don't look now!" But I somehow I could not move nor could I take my eyes away from these two. Never before had I seen two men kissing each other in this way. I found it ... disturbing, yes, but also strangely enticing ... In the shadows I saw the man with the beautiful mane lift a graceful white hand to open the other man's coat, affectionately his fingers caressed his lover's neck. The other man started moaning softly. I gasped and in this moment the first man turned around and stared in my direction. I was petrified because I was sure that -- despite the foggy darkness in these narrow streets -- he could see me. Gleaming eyes were staring at me from the shadows, his handsome face was distorted in an expression of menace and anger, maybe he even hissed a threat at me, I don't know. All this was a matter of a few seconds only. All of sudden, I became aware of the danger I was in and this gave me the strength to do the only thing I could do: run! And head over heals I stumbled into the darkness, hurried through narrow corridors and over countless small overpasses, not looking back, not paying attention to where I went. I only wanted to leave this strange encounter behind. But what had I seen? What had been so terrible after all? That I had watched two men kissing each other? No, it was the face of the one man I could not forget! That dreadful expression of threat and resentment, those terrible iridescent eyes! I was so lost in my thoughts that I directly hit upon to a man. "Scusi, " I mumbled and wanted to move on, but he held me close. "What has happened, Linn? Where have you been? We have been looking for you all the time!" I looked up, confused. Finally, I realized that I had run into Tyler. "Thank God, that you've found me! I've lost my way completely!" "My, my, one can't leave you alone for a minute!" he exclaimed with feigned despair, but I could feel that he was relieved, too. "The restaurant's just around the corner. We were already getting worried as you didn't show up!" "Oh, I'm so glad that I've stumbled into you! This town's a labyrinth I can tell you!" Tyler put his arm around me. "Now, come on. Don't worry any longer! Let me tell you all about the ball tomorrow evening! Chiara has already organized beautiful dresses for us!" He was talking on and on and I was so glad to hear his voice. With him I felt safe as if nothing could happen to me. Oh, how naïve had I been! As this was only the beginning ... |
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