-Disclaimers: Title belong entirely to Gabriel Garcia, just borrowing it for the sake of the story. Buffy, Spike, Whistler and all the memories belong to Joss and his crew, all other characters are entirely mine. Lyrics by BBMak Ghost of You and Me.

-Summary: Series set 100 yrs after "the gift", Season five finale. This is part AU and futuristic. Spike has been alive for 100 hundred years after Buffy's death. Whistler comes to him to let him know that Buffy has been summoned to fight a new evil, therefore she will be brought back to life and needs a "guide". When Buffy wakes she finds that the only one to cling to is the only person that has survived since the time she was alive. This is a B/S fiction.

-Rating: Overall rating of series is R.

-Spoilers: I will mention everything that has happened through "The Gift".

-Distribution: The only people that have permission to post these series are those who already store my fic and have asked me for permission, if you want to post it please ask me I'll be happy to let you, I just want to know where my fic goes. Poem : Emily Dickinson.

-Author's Note: I adore Feedback, so please let me know what you think of the story so far! bih80@yahoo.com

-Special Thanks: Trish for BETA reading this and her awsome feedback, Karla for listening to me rant, and One Good Day group may you be blessed with many chocolate covered naked Spikes! Thanks for all the reviews!

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"Within you I lose myself

Without you I find myself

Wanting to be lost again"

Author Unknown

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Spike stumbled back three feet and landed on his ass on the hard marble floor. His eyes were wide with fright and he kept backing up until his back hit the wall.

He was panting even though his lungs had not worked for over two hundred years.

He stared at her.

She was real.

She was alive.

He looked at her but the thoughts did not register with his brain, so he just sat there panting with eyes wide open

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What am I supposed to do
With all these blues?
Haunting me everywhere
No matter what I do

The first thing she felt was someone calling her. Beckoning her to come forward and "jump." So she did, she jumped. She did not remember what she was doing, with whom she was with, she just remembered opening her eyes and looking deep into eyes as blue as the sea after a storm.

Those eyes, that reminded her of a time so far away, so long gone, so sad.

The eyes screamed hurt, shyness, and life.

They called her, and she answered.

She blinked and she pulled the memory from times so long ago.

"Spike?"

His once tranquil and scared eyes went into a state of shock as he fell to the ground and stumbled back against the wall. She sat up and watched him retreat.

He was scared of her.

But why?

Last she remembered they were starting out as friends. He was kind of her partner. But those eyes that looked at her now where not of the man in love that she remembered, they belonged to someone else. Someone evolved, someone who grew up and left her behind.

She felt young and vulnerable under his gaze. Almost as if he could see right through her clothes.

When she looked down she had no clothes!

Her hands instantly went to cover her nude form, she looked frantically around the room and tried to stand up but her legs....she couldn't feel her legs!!

She screamed.

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He watched as she went from recognition to confusion, to complete bewilderment as she found her body naked, and to utter horror when her legs did not obey her.

She screamed.

He watched her, she looked so helpless, not the strong Slayer he remembered, not the wild untamed animal that walked with grace and beauty. She was now a child, new and freshly born.

She needed care not backup.

He was completely thrown, this was way more than what he had bargained for.

Her eyes searched his face for any signs of help. But he couldn't move, he couldn't talk, just stared at the vision before him.

"My Legs, I can't feel my legs." She whispered but he could hear her. Her wild eyes looked at him once more. "Why can't I feel my legs?"

Spike couldn't answer.

Whistler came up behind the shaken girl and wrapped a thick blanket around her nude body.

She looked at the demon surprised.

"Whistler?" she asked him.

"Hi'ya doing, kid?" He asked crouching down in front of her.

"I can't feel my legs." She repeated.

"Yeah, I'll take a while for you to regain all your motor skills." He answered.

"What's wrong with Spike? Why wont he answer me?" she asked. "Where's Dawn?"

Whistler looked back at the shaken Spike and shook his head. "You'll have to excuse him, he never prepares himself for this things."

Buffy nodded uncaringly.

"Where's Dawn?" Buffy asked worriedly.

Whistler sighed. "Kid, why don't you and me have chat."

Watching the candle flicker out
In the evening glow
I can't let go
When will the night be over

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He was on his twentieth cigarette. The last time he had chain smoked this much was after she had told him to get out of here life, and that had been one hundred fucking years ago.

Damn Her! He thought.

He passed the room back and forth, she would occasionally look at him in wonder at his attitude and appearance.

For the past hour Whistler had filled her in on what happened to her, how she had died, how she had remained dead, how she was needed, and now after one hundred and two years she had been allowed access to the realm of earth to be the next chosen one.

He had seen her get furious at the demon, but she looked too tired and weak to rip his head off the way Spike wanted to.

He had watched her cry when she realized all her family and friends were dead, including Angel. That's when she had looked at Spike for support but he couldn't offer her any. His own emotions were about to jump off a cliff, his thoughts were jumbled together and it seemed almost unreal.

Like a moment suspended in time, a suspended animation that Spike refused to believe. She was not there and they where not having this conversation. When he woke from this nightmare, he was going to fuck Opal silly and kill whatever 'case' he had that day.

It felt almost like the past one hundred years had not happened, like he was a walking zombie and all was an illusion, like the only thing that was real was her being alive and giving him those looks.

He wanted to hate her more than anything. But he knew once you loved the girl there was no going back. He didn't love her anymore, not the way he did back then. Now it was different. She represented all those memories that he had pushed to the back of his mind.

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I didn't mean to fall in love with you
And baby there's a name
For what you put me through
It isn't love, it's robbery
I'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me

It was wall too much for her. The last thing that she remembered was telling her sister that she loved her and jumping into a portal to save humanity.

Now when she wakes, opens her eyes to find a face she knew but has no idea who it is. She felt completely and utterly alone. That and she felt weak, her body felt like it had been sleeping for eons, but then she realized the weirdness in her life and just shook it off.

The wounds of things that happened so long ago where still fresh. She missed her mom most of all, now she would have no one. No sister, or watcher, or friends, no one but herself and the shell of a man she had once known.

This was not Spike, not her Spike. The Spike she remembered was vulnerable and sweet at times, completely in love and willing to do anything for her and her happiness. The Spike that passed and smoked before her was a strange man, secluded, mysterious, and hard.

The lines of his strong jaw seemed harder than usual and his body language depicted someone with extreme confidence in himself. But not the type of confidence that she had seen the first time she met him, it was a confidence that screamed normality.

And his clothes, her Spike had been all about Billy Idol black, this Spike looked like he just feel off a futuristic GQ magazine, and his hair! She had to do something about his hair, it was down to his neck, tied at the nape.

He was not nervous he was just confused. She could understand that, after not seeing her for one hundred years and thinking her dead...well she was dead, here she sat confused and alone.

Whistler was being kinder than usual, she noted, but then again he was always unpredictable.

"So tonight, you'll go with your friend Spike, and both of you will be on your way to the hell mouth in Bogota before you know it." Whistler finished his speech.

She could only nod numbly, she just wanted to crawl in her bed and never come out, then she realized that her bed was long gone and she would be starting fresh and new.

She shifted her weight, the feeling to her legs was slowly coming back, she just didn't know if she could move or not. She tried and failed miserably.

Whistler looked at Spike. The vampire sighed. He hated this.

He was by her side in a second. She looked up at the man before her expectantly. She cringed at the thought of what he had to do.

He bend down and without saying a word or looking at her scooped her up in his arms.

She shivered, he was so different. He seemed stronger than she had ever known him, but it was his confidence that shattered her nerves. He made her nervous. Like she didn't know what to say in front of him, thinking twice over her words to make sure she didn't flop in front of him.

Her small arms went around his strong neck and they made their way to the outside.

Whistler had said that she would go back home with Spike....oh no!!

"I am not sleeping in a crypt." She stated out of nowhere.

Spike looked at her long and hard. "Fine."

But he kept walking.

"I said I am not...."

"I heard what you said, Slayer."

She looked at him, he was being so.....mean. He had not called her Slayer since....well one hundred years.

"Where are we going then?" She asked trying to ease the situation.

"My place." he simply stated and before she could answer they were outside, fresh into the morning dawn.

She shivered in his arms and her head bolted to look at him in surprise. "The sunlight!!" she cried.

He held her tighter but kept walking.

"Ring of Amara." Whistler said to the unlikely couple.

Buffy looked back at Spike as they stepped into the sunlight. She gasped as she say him in the warm morning light. He was so different, like meeting him for the first time. Her eyes widened as his bleach blonde hair reflected off him, giving him an angelic look.

"When?" She asked still looking at him.

He could feel her gaze on her and it bothered him, it was like a reminder that she was there, that she was not going to let him ignore her.

It was hell.

"'bout forthy years back." He stated.

Buffy looked pensive, forthy years. The whole situation was unreal.

At that moment though held by Spike's strong arms she felt more alone and lost than ever. Strangely she missed his penetrating gazes that were always trying to figure her out. This man that smelled so good was a distant picture. He didn't care, he wanted her out of his life ASAP.

That made her scared. Who would she go to? What will she do?

She prayed for the powers to take her back. She did not want to live.

Spike stopped in front of his Vaken and Whistler opened the small compact door.

Buffy glared at the car.

"This is your car?" She addressed Spike but he ignored her and placed her in the passenger's seat tucking in her dead legs gently and closing the door for her. She was stunned and more than ever she wanted to be far away from everything including him.

Her eyes swelled up with tears, and she didn't understand why she was being so emotional. Perhaps it was that she felt cheated out of her 'duty' ticket, or perhaps was that the only other connection that she had to the life she cherished did not want her back.

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Seen a lot of broken hearts
Go sailing by
Phantom ships lost at sea
And one of them is mine

Whistler looked at Spike as he setled the girl in and turned to look at him.

"What's the matter with you," the demon demanded.

Spike pulled a cigarette out and lit it. "I don't know what your blabbering 'bout."

"Yes you do, you know very well what I am saying." he said pointing an accusing finger at Spike's chest. "That girl could have just had the trauma of her life and you're treating her like shit."

"This is not her place, this is not her time." he replied quietly without losing his temper. "I have a life, you know. Not gonna be after her like the wounded puppy I was back then. Got my own bleeding things to do, my own problems."

"I see." Whistler said nodding. "She reminds you of what you were, a pathetic man in love who forgot how to be a smartass. Who lost his identity in her eyes. She makes you question if you still want her, if you still want any woman at all. And you never want to go back there."

Spike shot out and punched the demon sending him flying to the floor.

"You have no bleeding idea what you're talking 'bout." Spike hissed at the man on the floor. "I died that day."

Whistler just looked at him with his hard face that meant, 'I know all the information good and dandy under the stars.'

"You'll see. Love does not go away. It is only ignored. Right now you are all she has. You're what she needs."

"Newsflash, mate. I've always been what she's needed. That's all I've been." With that he turned and jumedp in his car driving off with the slayer.

Whistler watched over them back away and stood up slowly shaking his head. "And I thought Angel was bad.....you'll see this time she'll see you." He whispered as he disappeared into thin air.

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Raising my glass
I sing a toast to the midnight sky
I wonder why
The stars don't seem to guide me

"Why did you hit Whistler?...I mean not that he doesn't deserve it most of the time, but that was...." She said in the car.

"Just a thing between me and 'im" Spike replied and drove in silence to his house.

Buffy peered at him form the corner of her eye. His hard jaw was strained and he looked positively pissed off, I mean she had seen him mad most of the time she'd known him, but right now he looked like you really shouldn't mess with him. So she decided to just let him lead her to a bed.

Spike's pale hands were paler at the knuckles.

There she was sitting in His car out of all places and looking all vulnerable. Like it was his fault that this happened to her.

He didn't want to talk to her, he didn't want to see her, she belonged in his memories not in his present.

She could hear him grinding his teeth back and forth, so she thought it better to sit quietly. She wanted to ask questions about what had happened in the past years but she was afraid he might go off on her and she really didn't have the strength to fight him at the moment.

They pulled through a gated community with lavishly large houses. Some were very modern some looked antique, but all very expensive. They reached another gate where a guard saw the car come and opened the door without further question. The house came into view and Buffy was glad she was sitting down.

Where did Spike get so much money from? There it was, it must have been three stories high and typical Spanish hacienda look to it. It looked like it fell right off a James Bond Movie. There were so many balconies that were filled and adorned with all types of hanging plants. Flowers bloomed at the base and the edge of the balconies, mostly fuscia and turquoise colors.

She gasped and he allowed himself to look at her.

Her small lips were shaped in a perfect "o" and her eyes were wide in amazement.

For that small second was all it took. This is the woman he had loved so long ago. He had nothing to offer her back then, he was nothing. Helping her for twenty bucks and a few pints of blood.

He felt ashamed.

I didn't mean to fall in love with you
And baby there's a name
For what you put me through
It isn't love, it's robbery
I'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me

She looked amazed at what he had become and he allowed a small smile to dance in his lips.

She turned to look at him and was surprise at his soft expression. She jumped in confusion and then bowed her head in embarrassment at her reaction to his property.

"You've done good with yourself." She said shyly.

"Well it kinda beats the crypt." He replied taking off his seat belt and getting up.

She watched him go around the car and opened her door. For some reason her heart beat fast, he was going to carry her again. Well the bedroom was probably upstairs and she knew for a fact that unless she got some sleep, her legs would just wobble like jelly.

He opened her door and picked her up, easily and effortlessly. Her small arms went around his neck and she blushed at their closeness.

He could feel her hot breath on his face and it made a weird sensation in his stomach, but he pushed it away, he was just probably hungry.

She felt good in his arms, small yet strong. Surprisingly he felt like his anger was evaporating and almost being replaced by joy. She was alive!

He walked to the entrance and she saw that they were already being expected, she blushed even harder when she saw three servants looking at them and smiling.

"Who are they?" She whispered to him.

He allowed himself to smile, this was too much.

"They work for me, pet." He said smiling at his crew.

She nodded numbly. Spike with servants? Can this day get stranger?

"Senor! La senorita esta bien?" (Sir, is the lady alright?) Efrain asked consernd as he saw his master carrying the blonde.

"Si ella esta bien, solo nessesita descansar." (Yeah, she's fine, just needs a little rest.) He replied.

Buffy looked at Spike in amazement. He just spoke Spanish in perfect agility.

"You speak Spanish?" She asked him.

"I speak fourteen different languages, being two hundred, twenty years does that." He replied as they entered the house.

She was completely amazed.

The ghost of you and me
When will it set me free
I hear the voices call
Following footsteps down the hall
Trying to save what's left
Of my heart and soul

The house inside was even more magnificent than the outside.

She could tell that no expense had been spared. From the Persian carpets, to the thick custom made curtains, and hardwood and tile floors.

The walls were decorated with rare paintings and exotic artifacts. What she found most funny was the amounts of mirrors the house contained, was Spike trying to remind himself he was a vampire?

She giggled lightly and he looked at her surprised, was she making fun of his house? Too nancy-boy like?

"What?" he glared.

"Mirrors....all over. Don't your servants gets suspicious that their 'master' is MIA?" She asked smiling.

"They know, slayer." He stated and started walking up the grand stair case in the center of the large foyer. The stairs were made out of pure marble, and the handles were gold. There were large pots of flowers and plants adorned throughout the house and Buffy could smell the scent of nature within the estate.

"They know?" She asked amazed. "Are they vamp...."

"Nope. Can't trust vampires in my line of work."

"Your line of work?" She asked raising an eyebrow.

"I'll tell you all about my 'calling' after you've rested." he said walking down the hall.

The hall was filled with more paintings and mirrors and plants in pots, some even hanging form the ceilings. There were a lot of windows also. She had to admit the house was beautifully decorated.

"Oh.....so you're talking to me then." She asked him.

He stopped and looked straight ahead.

She could see the hard lines in his face and his crushing teeth underneath the palid skin of his cheekbones.

"I am... you....." she started.

"You have to understand....." he took an unneeded breath. "You've been dead, for me, I buried you. It hurt like hell and at times it still does but for me you are dead. And all the sudden you're alive and talking like nothing happened. Like the past hundred years did not occur," he said slowly.

"Spike, I...."

"Please lets just get used to the changes." He said and continued walking.

They passed several doors until he stopped in front of a large gold-platted one and waited to be opened.

A woman came hurriedly from behind him and opened the door for her master. "Senor." (Sir) she said.

"Gracias." (Thanks)

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Watching the candle flicker out
In the evening glow
I can't let go
When will the night be over

Buffy gawked at her room. It was larger than her the bottom floor of her house,...well what used to be her house.

There was a four poster canopy bed in the middle, made out of cherry wood, and the quilts were red silk. It looked fluffy and damn right sexy.

The pillows thrown on top of it were golden silk. The carpets were thick in ivory cream and she could see how Spike's boots sunk into it.

There was a large window balcony that opened, letting in the morning sun. The curtains were trasluscent red that gave the room a dark yet bright glow.

"This is my room?" She asked in wonder.

He nodded and walked over to her bed placing her down gently.

He grabbed hold of the cherry oak poll and thanked him.

He walked over to the curtains, opening them, letting the sun in completely.

The woman who had opened the door for Spike brought in a tray of what Buffy guessed was food, placing it on the night table.

"Eat, you looked terribly thin. And this is your closet, Paola will help you with anything you need. And please don't hesitate to ask."

Buffy looked at Spike who had now taken off his black leather overcoat and was left with a tight fitting ivory cashmere polo whose sleeves claimed his tight arms, marking out his sculpted chest, and black dockers that tightly fir his lower body, giving away the slightest peek of his muscular legs and rounded ass.

"You're right, he is evil. But you should see him naked, really." She remembered the Buffybot saying.

She knew she was staring, but he looked so human and if she even dared think sexy she would smack herself.

"Senorita?" (Miss?)

Buffy was staring.

"Senorita?" (Miss?)

"Buffy!" Spike got her attention from Spike-staring land.

"What?" she asked startled.

"Paola is talking to you." Spike said smirking and pointing to the plump woman smiling at her.

"Sorry." she mumbled.

"Eat?" the woman asked.

"Yes, thanks you." Buffy said as Paola revealed her breakfast feast.

"I have to go out for few hours so relax. Eat, shower, sleep, we'll talk later." Spike said.

Buffy immediately looked at him. He was leaving her alone?

"You're going out?" She asked frantically.

"Don't worry you're safe." he said walking slowly to where she was at. "I trust my people with my life."

"Where are you going?" She asked taking the plate from the Spanish woman.

"I have a case I have to deal with before we leave to Columbia." He said placing his over coat on once more.

"When are we leaving?"

"The day after tomorrow. Don't worry about packing, Paola will do that, just be ready when we get clearance." He started walking out.

"Spike?" She cried out after him.

"Yeah, Slayer?" he asked tunring around.

"I won't bother you much longer with my presence, as soon as I get used to this I 'll get a job and I'll....."

"Don't worry 'bout it." he said dismisively. But she still felt bad, she felt like she was taking charity from this man she knew she had treated badly. "You'll stay until you're ready."

"Ready for what?"

"To be a Slayer." he stated and walked out the door.

She stared after him as tears swelled in her eyes. "Please go." she asked the servant and she nodded leaving the blonde to be by herself.

Buffy sunk herself on the soft bed that gave her no comfort. She felt totally and completely alone.

I didn't mean to fall in love with you
And baby there's a name
For what you put me through
It isn't love, it's robbery
I'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me

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