Title: If Only
Author: Atarashii
E-Mail: kitsune_atarashii@hotmail.com
Rating: G

Disclaimer: Mamoru ain't mine. I'm not making any profit from this fic. Please don't sue.


***

If Only (One-Shot)

***


Every day that passes by, to me, is like an eternity. Every day that I spend thinking about *her* just makes me want to throw things across the room asking, Why?! Why was I such a fool? How could I have hurt *her*?

She meant the world to me but becuase of those damned dreams, I left her, trying to protect her. Yeah right, great job I did protecting her. If protecting her is leaving her with a broken heart that only *I* could mend, but wouldn't because I feared for her safety. Because I love her.

But every night I lay in bed, gazing at the picture of her and me. If only I could tell her how truely, how deeply I care for her...if only. But I can't. I can't endanger her safety...

If only she knew how it pains me to ignore her. To avoid her in every way I can. And if only she knew that when we *do* meet, how much it kills me inside to treat her as coldly as I do. If only...

If only I wasn't a damned fool that thinks that safety comes before my love for her. If only I could tell her. Tell her the words to make her face light up with a smile that meets her eyes. To take her in my arms and kiss her deeply, passionately. If...

If only I had the nerve to ignore these dreams I've been having and tell you...

I love you, Usako.