Recently, little sis ((age) 19-24 (visit) daily) asked a question. She asked:
For the longest time in my life I thougght boys didn't notice me, now it seems like they are starting to. But in that time where I didn't have a boyfriend ever, I developed some strong friendships with girls. So strong that when some of them did eventually get boyfriends I would be jealuos cause it seemed like they were leaving me. I always wondered why I always felt soo jealous, it even brought me to think that perhaps I was a lesbian and that maybe everyone else knew it except me. To this day I sometimes get jealous of my girlfriends when they are in relationships even though I myself am in one too now. Is this wrong of me?? Could I be a lesbian??

Emilie's answer:
It is really normal for girls who are 'later bloomers' (or just don't feel the need to have a boyfriend early on) to develop close friendships with other girls. Then when these other girls get boyfriends, it almost feels like a betrayal to your friendship with them. Suddenly these girls have less time to spend with you since they are busy with their new boyfriends. Of COURSE you feel a sense of loss when these girls spend less time with you. It is not wrong for you to feel this way about your friends - however they might not understand if you expressed it to them. So you may just want to understand, yourself, that this is the way you feel, and that it's totally normal to feel this way. As for you being a lesbian - right now you have a boyfriend, right? Do you also feel sexually attracted to your female friends, or is it "only" a close bond that you share, in a non-sexual way? I would say that if you were lesbian, you wouldn't be asking me if you were - you would be TELLING me you were! I hope that helps...

Recently, Rico ((age) 19-24 (visit) yearly) asked a question. He(she?) asked:
Should I pretend to be someone I'm not and be nice or should I be me and mean to others?

Emilie's answer:
Everyone is a lot happier when people are nice. It depends what you want - if you want friends & people to like you, you should probably be nice. If you don't care if people like you or not, go ahead, be mean - but you will be pretty lonely. Why is who you are a mean person? Are you angry at a specific person (or people?) and want to cause revenge? Why would this then make you want to be mean to everyone? I am sure you will find it natural and you will be acting honestly & true to yourself to be kind to someone at some point in time - then think about it. Doesn't it feel nice? Wouldn't you like to continue in the future to be this way? If you think about it enough you may be able to continue & be happier and nicer in the future.

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