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Ask a question and be one of the first to be answered!!!
OK, if I could summarize: here is a friend, who you almost dated, and have known for years, but are not very close to. Right? I am guessing by the way you asked your question that you are saying you are not close because you haven't spent a lot of time discussing personal issues. That's fine. She's still a friend of yours, obviously someone whose welfare you care about, and someone you feel you can be honest with... These are all really good things, and put together they equal the motivation behind what I would suggest that you do. You have a responsibility to this woman both as a friend and as a fellow human being. It takes a brave man to own up to this responsibility, and since you sent me a plea for help in the first place, I believe and hope that you will be able to fill the role. Here's what you need to do: you need to tell her that you care about her and because of that you are worried about her. You would like to talk to her about her problems (if indeed she will talk to you, or if you actually would be willing to continue to listen to her...), or you have a suggestion that perhaps she talk to a counsellor since it makes you sad to see her so upset and you would like someone to help her. THIS IS NOT AN INSULTING THING TO SAY. You should not be afraid to hurt her feelings in saying this to her, because you are telling her because you care about her and are not just saying it in a flippant way the way some people do when they fight (ie, "you are so screwed up, you must need help!") That's not at all what you are saying. You are saying, I want to help you. If I can't do it, I would still like you to be helped and perhaps a professional can help you. If she has gotten to the point where she is right now it means that either no one else has listened to her & taken her seriously so far, or she doesn't feel comfortable enough sharing these feelings with anyone she knows. That is exactly why YOU need to be the one to take the initiative and to let her know that someone cares! She needs it from SOMEONE and she's not getting it from anyone else. Be that one person! Don't let her problem slide away without recognition! And please email me if you would like more help, or post another followup question through the form...
My question for Emilie is:
If I am having a dinner party with both beasts and humans, how can I make sure that both are comfortable with the other? I don't want to create a drama, and I would really like ot have beasts and humans at my dinner party. Can you help?
I can try to help! Are the beasts and humans going to be sitting at the same table? If so, you would probably be best to seperate the table to one side beasts, the other side humans, and where they overlap, put beasts and humans who are comfortable being in each others' company, such as yourself and others who wouldn't be offended by the table manners of the other species'. It might be easier if you put the two groups at two seperate tables, but that probably would not be as fun since it wouldn't encourage as much intermingling. I hope that helped!
My daughter wants me to supply a question for her advice Web page, but I can't think of one. What should I do?
Think harder! Come up with a question that applies to your life that you need an answer to. Then fill out the form to ask Emilie a question. Include your question and wait patiently for Emilie's insightful answer! See below, the next question, for WHY.
Why should people Ask Emilie a question?
I have a few answers to this. Pick whichever you like best!
First: It would make me really happy!
Second: It would help you to find an answer to a question you might not otherwise be able to get answered, and likely, you'd be able to get a quicker answer than you normally would (since I usually answer within 24 hours, sometimes in less than an hour, depending when I receive the question and have time to write back).
Third: It's free. Sometimes you have to pay other people to give you advice.
Fourth: That warm fuzzy feeling of satisfaction you get both from finding the answer to a tough question, and from helping out someone who wants to answer your questions...
I know you volunteer for Big Sisters and I think that's great but it's not for me. But I want to volunteer also. Do you know how I can find out more?
Actually, yes, I have a great resource for you. If you go to United Way's website, they have links to a United Way in your area. Go to the one in your area and it will have a list of programs that they have for people to volunteer for, and also the phone number of the local United Way if you wanted to volunteer directly for them.
My girlfriend doesn't want to see me anymore. I still want to go out with her. she has been sleeping with other people on the side. I dont know if i should forgive her or not. but she doesn't want to see me anymore anyway. what should i do?
It's probably not a good idea to hang around people who don't respect you, because it causes you to respect YOURSELF even less. It also causes people to hurt you because you aren't spending enough time (or respecting yourself enough to be) taking care of yourself. If this girl disrespected you enough to not be faithful to you in a relationship that you thought was monogamous, and if this hurt you, then don't get back together with her. Don't let yourself be hurt again. Look for another girl who will treat you better!!