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Bargain
Brand Heroes & Villians
(http://www.labofabyll.com/forum/threadid.php?threadid=1434)
Bargain Brand Heroes & Villians
This is
Smallington, a city too small to be dealt with by 'Real' villians.
Instead it is pleagued by second rate ones. But not to fear dear citizens for
there are heros here to protect you. But...'Real' heros don't waste their
time on second rate villians. That job it left up the the bargain brand heros.
Problem is...is it really worth it to be saved?
Ok...basically this thread going to be about heroes and
villians, that aren't your top of the line piece of work.
Why? Because, though they may have powers, there're not what you think
they are.
Basically it a comienic thread. You can be a villians that
tries to plauges this fair, but unlucky city, who aren't any better. Heroism is
also an option. Both have powers, but the powers have to have flaw in them.
Example: Ice boy, he can make ice cubes cooler, or Heat girl: she can make
herself hot, something along those terms.
Hero/Villian Name:
Secret
Idenity and job:
Description: (What coustume looks
like)
Powers:
Flaws:
---------------------------------------
Hero:
Single Woman
Secret Idenity and job: Trainiee, a waitress at an oldfastion
drive-in dinner.
Description: A waitress outfit: Red shirt, black skirt,
white old fastion rollerskates, gold waitress hat with the letter SW in black on
it.
Powers: Has every power superman does (including the mind
stuff)
Flaws: She can only use one at a time
Hero Name:
Logic
Secret Idenity and job: Just an ordinary, very cute ally
kitten.
Description: Black and white and chibi-like kitten.
Powers:
Godmoder
Flaws: She can godmode...as long as she isn't destracted. Powers
take 10 hours to recover after destraction. And because she's a cat, she can't
talk...much.
Hero/Villian Name:
Sterling
Secret Idenity and job: Dish washer John at "Dan's Food 4
U"
Description: wears shining platemail armor, with a broadsword and kite
shield, all silver
Powers: Can make his suit appear on him instantly, and his
very presence is a bane to the undead.
Flaws: Has no aim, has no sense of
timing, there are no undead in this day and age, and he's extremely clumsy. It's
best to duck or dodge when he swings, needless to say.
I'll try and
keep myself as light hearted as possible on this one. Been a while since I've
been able to goof around in an RP.
EDIT: Say, are we allowed to have
a second character? I'm sure I can come up with a good, goofy
villain...
Villain: The Silver
Pimp
Secret Identity/Job: Street hustler, pusher, pimp, etc.
Desc:
Different Apparel (Tracksuit, pimp outfit, street mobster, suave business man)
but all of his clothes have some indication of a shiny material, silver or not.
Black cane with a shiny disco ball on the top.
Powers: Commands the dreaded,
but charismatic, hooker army. Men have little to no chance of their
powers.
Flaws: Can get very angry, furious, raging, etc. May attempt to hit
own teammates/super villains in pure anger, causing them to momentarily switch
sides.
Hero(sort of) Name:
That (Creepy) Guy
Secret Identity: Guy who lives in his parents
basement
Description: He doesn't really stand out of a croud. Around 6', 6'1"
(possibly 6'2"), standard white male, brown hair, nondescript earthtone
clothing. Looks bored. Doesn't talk much. He's just sorta... there. He caries
around a black stick.
Powers: Super speed and strength, and talented enough
in combat. He has an eiree ability to creep people out majorly just by looking
into there eyes.
Flaws: He lacks the initiative to actually go out and do
something. Monster destroying city? Eh. Bank robbery? Eh. When he does do
something, it's often as little as possible. And sometimes he forgets where he
is/whats happening around him and just stares off into space.
(crap, I
forgot some of the stuff I was going to use for flaws... ah well. Maybe I'll
remember later.)
EDIT: Some stuff, plus a second character!!!! I'll
probably post #2's sheet in my first real playing post also.
Name:
Kamikaze Man
Secret Identity: What? Where?
Description: Short. Say...
5'1". He somehow beleives that nobody can recognize him when he's in 'uniform'.
Light brown hair, his costume is white spandex with red gloves/boots, a red
waistband, and a red K on his chest. Not to mention a giant 'bomb' strapt to his
back, as well as various other explosives about his personage.
Powers:
Nothing really. He seems to not feel pain or be aware of danger to his own
personage though. He can take a beating that one. And somehow, even when his
gigantic bomb explodes, he manages to not die. He can throw bombs at stuff
though. (as well as his infamous kamikaze attack [which likely does more harm
than good.]
Although he doesn't know it he was genetically altered to be
pretty much a human bomb before birth. Which is likely a weakness
too.
Weakness: He doesn't know when to quit. Plus he's kinda weak, though he
doesn't know it. Kinda a dork really, despite his gigantic bomb. Perhaps a
little naive with a "Good day Citizen" here and "Hello Madam" there. And he
sucks in a fight. None the less he also tends to be sort of... spastic. And
erratic. And due to the genetic engineering, any damage done to him might cause
him to explode. Quite literally.
Villain: The Forked
Tongue
Secret Identity/Job: Works at the local Cineplace (I've always wanted
to see a theatre named that ^_^)
Description: Rimmed glasses, White tights
with pictures of forks on the arms, legs, chest, and back (he sent away to have
it done proffesionally, but they messed the order up)
Powers: Snide remarks,
insults, and witty repartee galore.
Flaws: He can't take what he can dish
out. He completely breaks down if someone comes up with a really clever insult
for him. Also, the people he's insulting don't understand what he's talking
about half the time, anyway.
~e~ just remembered another flaw to add 
Villian Name:
B-movie man
Secret Idenity and job: Cecil and works in a video rental
shop
Description: brown short hair around 5"3, wears a black outfit with
pictures of Jason,Freddy Krueger and Mike Myers(the Halloween one),he had
originally started it as a t-shirt but decided to put a graboid on the pants
section.
Powers: knowing everything there is to know about how to kill people
and everything about B-movies
Flaws: too lazy to put it to any (limited) use
that may be
Hero/Villian Name:
Knowitall
Secret Idenity and job:Librarian in a public library for
children who can't read. Buisness gets very slow
Description: (What
coustume looks like): Skin tight blue outfit with a giant moon and star stamped
in gold on her chest. Gold boots and gold gloves. Gold headband as well.
Powers: Knows everything thats gonna happen or will happen. Can cast low
level magic.
Flaws: only knows everything about the things no one cares
about. Like how fast a dung beetle can lay its eggs in a 400 gram pile of dung.
That sorta stuff.
OOC: Yes, you can have more the one. This can start at anytime that the villians like to start it at or the heros that want to make flashy introudction in. People who what to join are welcome anytime.
Hero/Villian Name:
Fear
Secret Idenity and job: Cashier at Food King supermarket. His name's
Chet Mannix.
Description: Black jeans and black t-shirt with a black mask. Oh
yeah, black sneakers too.
Powers: He can bring a peron's fears to
reality.
Flaws: He has a massive list of phobias.
*A terrible
explosion is heard at the City Hall area. People scream at their highest pitches
as they run from the scene. Citizens and business officials pour out from the
Hall, as one man, dressed in a supa fly silver jumpsuit, exits the building,
almost...
Strutting???*
HAHAHAHAHA! What a foo'proof plan! Now the
city of Smallington will know the name...
"SILVER PIMP!!!"
*He
strutted out the hall, his disco ball cane in one hand, a woman in the other.
She was the mayor of the town. Ms. Jowanna Doowit. He planned on making her, his
bitch. Thusly, he would rule over the city!*
"don`t you have any
of Jeepers Creepers in stock?"
The customer had to nudge and finally slap
a pale youth at the counter.
"wha-what I`m up,I`m up!"
"look do
you have any of Jeepers Creepers in stock?"
"uh....nah their all on
loan"
As the customer turned his back Cecil picked up a knife from the
counter and tried to slash the guy in two,but the man stepped forward and Cecil
sat back down,"fuck it,I want to kill him but I`ll have to lean forward a whole
more inch...."
Silver Pimp felt a slam in the back. When he regained his steps, he looked down to see a black chibi-kitten looking up at him with confused eyes.
A taxi pulled up
outside City Hall,a man wearing a pair of black jeans and t-shirt with pictures
of famous horror movie figures all over it along with a white hockey
mask.Sluggish taking his chainsaw out of the boot.
"fuck it,so many
minutes wasted in that thing...better than walking..now lets see if anything is
happening that I can watch"
Silver Pimp felt
the blow and released the hold on the mayor. She started to run, when from the
dark alleys of the road, a bevy of prostitues emerged and restrained
her.
"Aw hell. You jost didn't doo dat!!" the Silver Pimp exclaimed. *He
looked at the little cat, almost ready to take the pimp's face off.*
B-movie man
shuffled over to the Silver Pimp,resting his arm on his chainsaw.
"I`d
help you like...but man it looks like sooo much effort..."
He turned to
B-Movie man and smiled, "Too moch effort? Jeez you lazy!" He frowned, "Take some
ho's with yas if you want. Maybe that will cheer ya up." SP (Silver Pimp)
smiled.
"Anyways, back too tha cat!" He brandished his pimp
cane.
BM brightened up
though on hearing the word hos and pathetically kicked the cat off him,just
enough force put in that could bruise a fly.
"I prefer the term
energitcally challenged"
Chet was walking in
the park when he saw a big brown shaggy dog. Normally this would be a cause for
alarm but instead Chet remained calm as he walked past. After that the dog
barked and he found himself up a tree. A tree full of bees. Chet deftly lept
into a pond and then, just as deftly, lept out again when he realized that the
dog he saw earlier was coming toward him. The whole incident took place in less
than a minute but for our hapless hero it was an eternity.
However, he
somehow manged to escape the dangers of the park and wound up at City Hall. He
noted that the Silver Pimp was causing trouble again. He resolved to stopthis
fiend when he saw a most terrifying sight. No, not the slacker with the chainsaw
and mask, the adorably cute kitten! A vicious man-eating harbinger of bad luck
and doom!
All thoughts of intervention were driven from his head as he
ran full speed back to the park. He then ran back to City Hall being chased by
the brown dog from before. His screams alerted all who were standing nearby that
he was coming.
I fixed it!
Sterling dropped a dish, and it shattered on the floor. "My hero sense is tingling....." He ranout the back door, and came out a back alley, already in his armor. "The Silver Pimp! And B-Movie Man! My Arch Nemesis....es, es....No matter! I shall stop you!" Sterling ran at them, sword held high.....and tripped over a crack in the side walk. "AAAAHH*WHUMP!*"
BM looked at the fallen swordsman,"dude you should really just walk,I`m not going anywhere for awhile..urgh guess you want to fight,here pimp guy could you like rev this for me?"
"No
prahblem!"
*The SILVER (note to Crash) Pimp grabbed the chainsaw, grabbed
the ripcord and yanked it with all of his supafly pimp strength (what with all
the pimp/bitch slapping in all). The chainsaw revved and started to
purr.
He handed it back to B-Movie Man, "Here yas go!"
*Then, a
shriek of pure horror caught the SP's ear, as Fear, the VERY unlikely superhero
emerged from the park. He motioned with his cane.*
"Ho Squad! Get
him!"
BM grabbed the chainsaw and dragged it across the ground causing sparks to fly as he slumped over to the fallen swordsman,"don`t suppose theres any chance you`d be willing to cut your own head off?"
Miss Knowitall was
sitting in her chair typing away at things that made no sense. She pushed her
wire rimmed glasses above her nose.
"Interesting...I didn't know Platypus's
could do that."
A little dot came up on her screen
"Ah!! TROUBLE! I MUST
GO! FOR I AM...MISS KNOWITALL!"
She dressed up all shiny cheapy like and took
off running, but not before locking up the library.
-----
Coming
upon the huge gathering she commented.
"Well you're all just like a gaggle of
geese on their way from the north migratory dispenses of the upper
regions!"
Sterling shoved himself up with heroic speed and strength!....and fell over onto his arse. "Ow. And no, I'm not cutting my own head off! When I finally get balanced, darn this armor, you'll be in a dilly of a pickle!"
BM shrugged,"uh sure why not...alright then hold still...don`t want to have to do this again",he picked up the chainsaw and held it above his head before falling back,into a sleeping position,"zzzzz......up an hour,damn I`m knackered"
*Silver Pimp took
his cane and poked B-Movie man.*
"HEY YOUS! GET THE F*CK UP BEFORE I
PIMPSLAP YOU,"
SP screamed into his ear.
BM looked up and sat up using his elbows and pushed his chainsaw towards Sterling using his foot,"but c`mon man,its like I have to move it half a foot...that requires far too much doing..."
The Forked Tongue
ran down the street cackling, a nondescript sack over one shoulder. An
over-weight police officer stopped to pant for breath behind him. FT turned and
jogged backwards mockingly. "What's the matter, pudgy policeman? Eaten one too
many babies today? Don't they have anyone better to send than the
boys-in-berry-blue?"
"I... told... oof... you... it's... gasp... a... pant...
slow... metabolism... gasp..."
"Slow like molasses, well, obviously not when
you're scarfing it down, uweeheheheee!!!"
Fear ran into the
Ho Squad and screamed in...no, wait, this is a good thing. Fear smiled and then
realized what he was supposed to do.
"I have no time for you women of low
moral standing!!!" Fear cried out. "I must defeat these fiends. Perhaps
later."
Single Woman could be seen flying in and toward the City Hall window. Closer and closer she came until. *Wham* "Damnit, damnit. Forgot, can't go through walls if I'm flying." she cried as she slid down the window to the ground. Holding her nose she burst in through the door. Nasiled she said, "Do not fear, for I am here."
Well...it just so
happens that Logic suddenly stood in front of Forked Tounge, not realizing she
was there and tripped the guy with her godmoding strength.
OOC: She's a
godmoding cat. She could show up anywhere...as long as she isn't destracted by
moving objects 
Forked Tongue fell
with a smack onto his back and dropped the sack with a whack, and raised his
hand to smack, "Ack, watch where you're standing, you jack- oh, hello, it's the
catastrophe waiting to happen." He quickly gathered the money that had spilt out
of the bag.
((I couldn't help it, I started typing and that sentance
wrote itself
))
Logic cocked her head to the side in a sort of curious fashion. She then walked over to FT and playfully bapped his head...which seemed to feel like a very hard punch to him.
The Forked Tongue jumped up, indignantly. "No fair, you're a cheetah!"
*SP looked at how
fear defied the ho's! It was something short of a miracle.*
"No mattah!"
Silver Pimp exclaimed, "Ho Squad! Lapdance mode!"
*The strippers and
prostitues grabbed ahold of fear and seated himself on one of the abandoned park
benches.*
"Just thenk abowt it mahn! Alla dem will give you a lapdance fo
free!"
*Too good to be true? You ask?*
Logic climbed up
FT's back, putting a ton of weight on him. She yawned and groomed herself before
curling up and falling asleep...thus knocking off her godmoding ability (Bad
idea
)
As soon as the
weight was released, the Forked Tongue got up and pulled the kitten off his
back. "Why you little..." But then he noticed the policeman had almost reached
them, "Don't think I'm a felinthropist or anything, it's just that I don't have
the time right now, and I usually prefer not to insult the intelligence of
anyone too stupid to be offended." With that, he tossed Logic at the officer,
who had stopped to catch his breath again, and ran off again. As he passed the
owner of the store he'd robbed, he gave him a rasberry, "This'll teach you, you
pathetic comic book otaku, to fling petty insults at... the Forked
Tongue!"
"Oh, I'm so scared!"
Logic woke up in the arms of the exhausted officer. Again, she cocked her head to the side, meowing, jumps off him and walks along the sidewalk.
Fear gritted his teeth and tried to concentrate on his mission but it was to no avail. The seductive power of the Silver Pimp's hos was far too strong. Fortunately, he saw a spider crawling near his hand. For a moment overwhelming terror and carnal pleasure battled fiercely for control of Chet. Panic won out in the end of course and, with amazing strength, Chet broke free and ran off screaming like the little punk he is.
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