Baby, Talk is cheapPlease Give me time to take this all in. I'm summing up four whole days into this article and so much has happened. You might be shocked, you might feel sorry for me, you might feel happy for me too... But without a doubt, I know this story will make you think hard about life, love, relationships and will probably give you mixed up emotions.
Last Friday, My Mister Perfect actually replied to my text message. I asked for is e-mail, he asked for mine, i was being a total flirt... again and he would always end his messages by signing Love Martin. Maybe it's a british thing to sign your messages at the end of a text but... did he just say Love? A four letter word which I have been waiting to hear my whole life? After endless hours of jumping up and down and screaming at the top of my lungs, i pause for a moment and take in the moment. Can I really make a long distance fling work?
Saturday Morning came surprisingly fast and he was still the only thing on my mind. For some reason, he somehow belonged there and I felt miserable not having him around. He told me he was having a good time, hanging out with his friends in london... which made me feel totally jealous. I told him I was really bored and that I wasn't going to bug him anymore and he said he hoped I was okay and that I wasn't bugging him. He's the only person who can make me run out of words. Late at night, My cousin, Bea Pages, Came for a sleepover. We bonded, shared secrets and of course, i told her how I felt about Martin. I went on and on... Telling her that He was what I wished for and He left without knowing how I really felt about him. I then planned to tell him through a text message after a few days. I typed in the message and showed Bea.
Hey Martin, To tell you the truth... I Like you.
It was short, sweet, safe and to-the-point and all I had to worry about was what he would say after.
Bea sort of smiled and said sarcastically, "Oops, I sent it!". I, of course, didn't believe her and said "Yeah Right, Bey". She gave me this look which showed me that she was serious. I wasn't prepared for what was going to happen. I muttered out about a thousand Oh My God's and my heart was beating so hard, I could practically hear it. And that's when I heard it, the sound of mesmerize as a polyphonic message tone. Did I really want to open the message and find out what he was going to say? I took a chance and did it. My heart pounded on my chest to a louder beat, I couldn't believe my eyes.
I like you too
My world turned over but I had to ask, What happens now? Are the butterflies in my stomach going to kill me? At that moment I had to wonder: Where do I go from here?
I realized that someone halfway around the world could really change my life. Those three small words definitely went a long way and I was the happiest person in the world. For the first time, I liked someone who actually liked me back. For the first time, Boys weren't just disgusting, dirty pigs... they were sweet, disgusting, dirty pigs. BUt Seriously, I saw boys in a whole new light. Instead of the perverts, weirdos and meanies, there was somehow a sweet, sensitive, funny guy who I can relax and have fun with. I found a guy I could actually talk to, A guy who I wasn't afraid of, The Most Perfect guy in the world. I asked him if he meant it... he said YES.
I woke up to sunday. I felt a little overwhelmed, a little blurred out. I was afraid to wake up and realize that what Martin said was all just a dream. I felt like I had to grab on to something or else my whole body would just fly away. Something strange has come over me and I knew exactly what it was. Later, I sent him messages and he would answer in one or two words which really annoyed me. He didn't ask questions and didn't even remember the reason why we first talked to each other. I thought maybe saying I liked him made him shy, maybe he had second thoughts about it, maybe he told me he like me just to be nice. I don't know what happened but I started to cry. I started to regret and wish for different things. I cried because I thought I was too agressive, I cried because I held on to him so tightly, I couldn't let go.
For awhile, I thought there was no one I could turn to. Luckilly, Bea was there to tell me everything would be okay. Thanks to her, I didn't feel so alone. I knew I was being selfish and that all I thought about was me. So, I decided to not think of things that could be not true and instead, I thought of all the great things that had just happened to me. Someone totally wonderful from London likes me and I have the greatest, most supportive friends in the world.
I went to church the next day. I lit a candle for martin and prayed that he was happy. I prayed God would bless him, take care of him, watch over him and make him successful in everything in life. I hoped he would fall in love one day and that he and his family will have good luck. Walking out of the church, I realized that that was one of the most unselfish things I have ever done and for once, I didn't think of myself. I realized I finally grew up and learned to act more maturely about things.
I came home and felt good about what I did. It felt good praying for martin and I noticed, I wasn't so sad anymore. After all, Falling in Love isn't about one person, it's about two people learning to trust each other, two people learning to listen to their hearts instead of their minds, two people who were going through something great. Although we were a thousand miles apart, the three words we both admitted to each other made us a few miles closer.