Janda, the 10th of Marra, in the early autumn of 272YT.
And again the goblin comes. I was sitting today with a old female human...whose name I never learnt, when the evil fiend that has been slaying so many of my bothers and sisters ran in from the west. He drank eagerly from the well (which I was sure was still poisened) and cast deadly glance at both myself and the human. I quickly ran, as did the human, and I doubled back to cover my route. As I write this I am nearing Pineview...to my knowledge he has not been around these parts so I will feel safer, and maybe catch up with some whittling.
Oh what to do? Running is all I can do. I do not, and will not fight. There are maybe some bramans who would go aganist this, and make their money skinning creatures of the forests. In my opnion that is a task for humans and mysrra. I cannot deal with the blood of another on my hands, whatever race or creature it may be.
Kinres, the 15th of Marra, in the chill of autumn of 272YT.
My life is most uneventful at the moment. I have found a slight haven in Pineview, though things are also bad here. Another braman, I do not recall the name, has been attacking and killing humans. I apoligized on behalf of my race...what else can I do? As in my previous entry I still believe braman's are pacifists. These people...they go aganist what we are, they give us all a bad name. Maybe I should not worry about such things....but I have to confess I do...most deeply.
Well here in Pineview I am whittling. At the moment I do not know of another way to make money. I am not strong enough to carry herbs or fruit over to the isles so it rules that out. I will NOT skin to make money. Glass making is something that did catch my attention, and if I could be bothered do drag sack fulls of sand from Banzar, maybe I would do this. But it would be too time consuming and weighing things up I will make more money at the moment whittling.
Not only that, Pineview is always full of people...people watching has always been a great passion for me, so it is an almost haven here for me. Maybe I can learn how the other races think...though on reflection it may be more benificial to learn how these 'renegade braman' think.
So for the moment, I am whittling. I have the tools for glass making, but not the skills. Maybe when things have settled in Banzar I can return and work on the latter. I hope so anyway.
Janda, the 17th of Marra, in the chill of autumn of 272YT.
Today I did something maybe I should not have. I love books and scrolls and papers..some of those I have come across have been of a magical nature, yet they intrested me. Today I was in Forest Heart and found a scroll in a shop. It was not that expensive, so I bought it. Upon reading I realized it was not just a scroll about magic, it contained precise instructions on casting a spell...a spell called warm.
Shaking with fear, curiosity and anticipation I moved deep into a forest and attempted to cast this spell. The first few times nothing happened. Then suddenly I was enveloped by a bust of white heat! All my limbs have reddish patches on them where the heat burnt me. Yet I did not feel the pain. I felt excited. It's like another world...one where I do not have to conform to the other races....I felt like I had power!
I would never, if attacked fight back. I would run. I could never raise a weapon to another...yet if I had magic that would prove an adequate defence. In my head I imagine scenes of this goblin running towards me, then being thrown to the floor by the power I weild. I feel alive, for the first time in my life, I feel alive.
Yet my conscience says no. Without magic there would have been no Breaking, no black blood...but on the other hand, if none of that came to pass, I would not be here. Neither would the many other thousands who live in these lands. Things would be so different...
If people were not so closed minded towards magic, I could ask another's view. Yet that is not possible...this is one choice I must make alone...
Lunos, the 20th of Marra, in the chill of autumn of 272YT.
Decided to make some money by buying fruit today. I had done it before but found the goblin had killed the fruit buyer in Banzar, but I found one in Forest Heart. After picking the fruit, I headed back to Banzar and found the goblin. He could not see me luckily so I headed to the well and waited for someone who was strong enough to kill him to come. After a short while Wyndangel came and I told her of the goblin. She attacked him, almost killing him...I was shaking with excitment...but he ran off. We both tried to find him, me searching to the northwest and west and her to the east and northeast, but it was to no avail. Maybe he will understand now that he is not wanted here.
Sunes, the 7th of Aundin, in the heat of summer of 273YT
A long time since I have had the time or chance to write in this book...almost a year! Yet recent events have prevented me from doing this. I left it in my shop in Banzar and, in fear of the goblin, did not have a chance to retrieve it.
Twice myself and Wyndangel ran into the goblin, twice we ran away. His strength and fighting skill grow at a tremendous rate. Guards have been drafted in to Banzar, but can do little to prevent the goblin killer.
For the while, no more I will speak of this, as just thinking of it saddens me deeply. All this life lost, all this pain...
In Pineview now a possessed braman kills also. She has taken my life from me once so I keep my visits to any towns to a minimum.
However, I have been spending much time in the Verdent Isles Manor. Reading, and re-reading the books of magic that are kept there. Much I have learnt, both from these, and from my good friend Wyndangel. She has told me of some of the keeps in which the scrolls are kept. Though she is no mage, she has great knowledge, and with this, and my determination I belive a great bond and a great chance for peace is forming.
As to this date, I know no less than four spells. I will detail them here.
Enliven - a minor healing spell, requiring a root of ginger (and possibly some moss, though I am not sure). Not only does it heal, it can also be used to make undead creatures easier to kill. Some of the scrolls I seek are hidden in places where skeletons reside, so this spell, I belive, will be most useful.
Warm - a spell that warms a person or a room. When not well studied, the side effects can be most painful.
Thunder Bolt - this is the spell I have studied most. It does not tire me out as much as the others and is a spell of illusion. It makes it seem that a storm is overhead or on it's way. I do not see any other use for this, other than dramatic effect, yet even this could be a great aid.
Rejuvenate - a spell I learnt but yesterday, so the effects I have not yet wittnessed myself. From what Wyndangel told me, it is a very strong healing spell. The side effects however of being encased in it's healing aura are great thirst and hunger. It requires a root of ginger and moss. It also requires preperation before casting, which none of the other spells I possess do.
Though I may speak of these in a most sientific way, these skills excited me greatly. Though I myself, veer away from combat (though the way things seem outside of the isles, this is something I may have to change..) others do not, and embrace it. In some ways, this can create peace, in other's war. Killers such as this goblin or the braman, do not seem to wish to talk, or give reason for their actions. When they do, they are but senseless words. With people such as these, I cannot hope to bring any kind of diplomancy towards, and can only stand by while they are slain by others.
Of course there are some that will listen. There will always be some death, that cannot be denied. Races such as mysrra eat only meat, so they must hunt in order to survive. Goblins I believe also prefer the taste of meat to plantlife. Though I am happy with my diet, and do not wish to eat meat ever in my life, I can understand that some do, and so they must.
However fighting between and among races is another matter. When I was slain by the braman, nothing was taken from my body, so theft was not the motive. All I can think of is some kind of blood lust. The power she feels when she takes anothers life. In one way, I can understand this. With the little magic I possess, I can feel great power. As my skills and knowledge grows, as will this power. Though in my case it is different, I am recieving bliss not from death, but from life. I wield the power to heal not kill. Of course I am not so stubborn that I belive I will never wish to gain power from death. In some ways it is a greater power.
I relaize as I write this, I am controdicting myself. I wish for peace, yet I belive I will take life. Maybe in some ways, this is a balance. A balance of the races, could bring peace. If life is restored in the same way it is given, a half way point is reached. A peace in a way.
For the while however, I will continue with my studies of life. Of course there are difficulties. It is magic, and many people belive that an evil thing, even if the outcomes are good. There are not many I could treat. Maybe the more understanding would listen. With my skills, I wish to aid life, not take it...I just hope others will understand this.
For the moment, only my good friend Wyndangel knows my skills, and she, only a little. I think next time I see her I will talk of what I have written here. More evil will come...I call it evil...how can it be evil if it is a balance? Yet I do not know what else to call it. When I write evil, I mean taking life and dealing pain, be it emotinly or physical. There will be those who possess only the 'evil' magic. I have heard of spells that can render one unconsious, leaving them open to attack. I think if I am to understand a balance, I must know some of these magics.
I am so confused, yet writing here helps me think. Seeing it down on paper makes me understand a little. The lands need peace, peace is achieved by balance, in order to understand this balance and achieve a kind of inner peace, death must be used in the same way as life. This will of course come in time. I can only concentrate on one thing at a time, so for now, I will continue with the magic of life.
I will now write down about the goblin. Though I do not wish to, it needs to be documented before my memory fails me.
A few months ago I went to Pineview to ask people to aid with the goblin. Within a short while I 'met' the evil braman. As she attacked a human, I cast 'warm' hoping she would be fearful of it and run. However she attacked and killed me before the casting was compleate. About a day and a half later, I returned, in full health, in the arms of Wyndangel. She had held me there so I would not return to Banzar. Knowing I had come here to seek help, she became worried when I did not return and came to see if I was still here. The braman had left by then, so she sat with me and waited.
When I awoke, there was also another braman, by the name of Syn, and human lady, whose name I forget, and a male human named Bendar. We traveled to Banzar, and before reaching there went to the cabin to plan. We decided to split into groups and search the town. Syn and the female human went as one groups, Wyndangel and Bendar as another, and, being reckless, myself alone as the third. Searching the whole town, and the caves on the beach, we found nothing. A little later Wyndangel went off to get food, I went out into the woods to think and Bendar left for other realms. A short while passed, and the human lady ran out and found me, screaming that Syn was being attacked. I ran into the town and found an old human man standing over the corpse of Syn. Believeing the goblin to be the killer, I quickly asked the human to take Syn to the church and went off in search of the goblin. I did not find him, but fearing more attacks, I went to find Wyndangel. We returned to the town, and as I was searching the caves found a most dreadful sight. The old human man, the goblin and the corpse of Syn were in the caves together!
I could not believe my eyes. Quickly I ran to the bank and told Wyndangel of this. I have not the power or the will to attack another, and even Wyndangel would not last long aganist two so we decided to leave Banzar.
As we were doing this, from out of nowhere the goblin and the human appeared and began chasing us. I was leading Wyndangel and manged to lose the human on the road, but still the goblin followed. Luckily, after a long chase we outran him.
A few weeks later we were back in Banzar and found the goblin sitting by the well. Wyndangel attacked him, but he proved to much and yet again we had to run, achieving another near miss.
Since then I have not been in Banzar much, yet at least twice more I have seen people attacking him. The last time was two days ago, so he still lives, still doing the same...