Disclaimer:- Paramount owns all that is and ever shall be star trek, I merely borrow them for the sadistic reason of making the characters dance to my tune. I promise to return them bruised perhaps but all the same in one piece.

Rating N/C 17 because anything else wouldn't be as much fun

My thanks to Robin who has worked her way for the past x amount of days beta reading these parts. Her encouragement is never ending and her tolerance for fixing up my terrible spelling and grammar is amazing. She is as always a constant source of support.

To Robin with my thanks, to Kalem with my love.

Choices (part 2)

Chakotay managed onto his feet first and bent to help Tom. Tom for all the world was as pale as death, the fine sculptured features swollen with his crying. He staggered slightly, and one of the guards moved towards him. And Chakotay lost it.

"Get away from him!!!! Get the fuck away from him. Don't lay a fucking finger on him, do you hear me?" In an instant, he was standing between Tom and the guard. The guard just shrugged and pointed in the direction he wanted the men to go.

Chakotay turned to see that one of the guards had stopped to pick up their clothes as they made the journey back to their cell.

"I'm wet," Tom said quietly to Chakotay as he helped him through the cell door. Fresh tears rolled down the pilot's face.

For a moment Chakotay was unsure of what Tom was talking about, and then he realised that a mixture of semen and blood was trickling down Tom's legs. Before the guard had a chance to leave, Chakotay turned towards him.

"Can I have some water to clean him?"

The young guard looked sympathetically at the commander and nodded. A few minutes later the guard was back with a bucket of water and two pieces of cloth. He dropped the bucket just inside the door and tossed the cloths in Chakotay's direction.

Before leaving, the young guard glanced over at Tom who was lying on his side on the small cot at the far end of the cell.

"Calven can be a very cruel man," he said quietly so that the other guards standing in the corridor could not hear. "If it's of any consolation, if you hadn't done what he asked, he" he pointed to Tom, "would most likely have been turned over to the men, and he wouldn't have survived the night. He has to perform tomorrow Commander; it's all that is keeping you and your team alive. Tend to him." With that the door was closed and bolted shut, and Chakotay and Tom were left mercifully alone.

Chakotay lifted the bucket and carried it to where Tom was lying.

"Hey," he said quietly and stroked Tom's hair back from his face. "Did you know that you're the bravest man I have ever met?"

Taking the bucket, he poured some of the water into the bowl that he had used earlier when cleaning Tom's eye. He dipped in the cloth and to his surprise he found that the water was actually warm. Starting with Tom's face, he gently washed away the dirt and marks left by his tears. Slowly he worked his way down Tom's body stopping only to change the water.

"Tom." Chakotay stroked the pilot's cheek. "Would you roll onto your stomach so that I can clean you?"

Chakotay held his breath, unsure of how Tom might react to his request, but slowly Tom did as he asked, and Chakotay started the task of cleaning him. He breathed a sigh of relief when he realised that Tom was not badly torn; his preparation had for the most part worked. Like any virgin, Tom would most likely have bled although the trauma would have been less if Chakotay had had a proper lubricant. When he had finished washing and drying Tom's legs, he pulled the blanket up around him and then started to clean himself as best he could with what water was left.

A short while later, Chakotay pulled on his uniform and sat down on the floor beside the cot, he cradled his head in his hands, silent tears running down his cheeks. He lifted his head when he felt a light pressure on his shoulder and turned to face Tom Paris. Long slim fingers gently started to stroke the side of Chakotay's face.

"Its ok," Tom said in a voice that was more of a croak than anything else. "I heard what the guard said. You probably saved my life today or at least bought us some time. Voyager is bound to be looking for us soon. We were supposed to report in today, weren't we?"

Chakotay nodded. "Yeah Kathryn doesn't like it when her crew don't obey orders. She'll begin to worry soon. She'll get us out." He paused as Tom's hand slid over his lips. "Tom if we get--when we get back, you will be within your rights to have me charged with assault. I'll understand Tom. I'll take any sentence I'm given. I...I." Chakotay closed his eyes and turned away from Tom's gaze.

Tom's fingers threaded through the commander's hair and then started to knead the tight muscles of Chakotay's neck.

"Chakotay, the things you did today you had to do. There were even moments that I could have forgotten that we were naked in front of dozens of men. Chakotay I don't, won't be pressing charges against the man who saved me from gang rape."

Chakotay sighed, "We have tomorrow to go through."

Tom nodded. "I've never done anything like this Chakotay. I don't know if I can, I mean I don't know if I could."

Chakotay took Tom's hand in his and brought it to his lips. "I've had rough partners before, and I can't imagine that you would hurt me." He kissed Tom's fingers.

The pilot briefly stared into the older man's black brown eyes and then shook his head. "But I've never…."

Chakotay placed a finger to Tom's lips. "We can worry about that tomorrow. We should get some rest." Chakotay rolled up his uniform jacket and placed it on the ground.

"What are you doing?" Tom asked, his forehead creasing into a frown.

"I'm going to try get some sleep, why?"

"Not down there on the floor you're not. There is room here Chakotay, and let's face it, you know every part of me now inside as well as out. I think we can sleep in the same bed."

Tom moved back a little to make room for Chakotay to lie down. Chakotay sighed and reluctantly climbed in beside the pilot.

"I really am sorry Tom," he whispered.

"I know Chakotay, I know."

Both men slept uneasily through the night, and it was Tom who rose first. Gingerly climbing out from behind the dozing commander, he made his way over to where his clothes were piled up on the floor and bent to pick up his uniform pants.

"Damn," he muttered quietly to himself, wincing as a burning sensation centred between his buttocks. Fresh tears sprung to his eyes as the reason for his discomfort flooded his memory. He eased himself down onto the floor and slowly pulled on his uniform pants.

He was going to have to do the same to Chakotay--he had to fuck his commanding officer in front of a rabble of drunken soldiers. Tears rolled down the pilot's cheeks.

*What if I can't do it? If I can't get an erection what will happen? Fuck, even if I can, I just, oh god help me. *

Tom closed his eyes and pulled his knees up to his chin. The rest of his clothing lay at his side.

"Tom?" The pilot jumped as a hand settled on his shoulder.

"Don't! Don't fucking sneak up on me like that," he said as he pulled away from Chakotay's touch.

"I'm sorry Tom. I didn't mean to startle you. I just wondered if you were ok." Chakotay pulled the blanket from the cot. "Here," he said handing the blanket over to the pilot, "you're shaking."

Tom stared up at Chakotay as he moved back to the cot and sat down.

"I can't do it Chakotay," he said quietly. "I just can't. And before you go cracking up at me about me gay bashing, that's not the reason. I...just, it's just I never did a man ever and...."

Tom got onto his feet and started to pace the cell. "I just don't know how to ... Fuck, Chakotay what kind of a sick sorry bastard has people raped for entertainment?" Tom ran his hand through his hair, and his voice wavered as he choked back a sob. "This is just a fucking nightmare. I keep thinking that I'm going to wake up."

He stopped in front of Chakotay whose head was bowed and whose lashes were glistening with moisture.

"Chakotay?" Tom crouched in front of the first officer but winced with discomfort and decided it would be more comfortable to be on his knees. Chakotay was on the verge of tears, and Tom couldn't help thinking that it wasn't the hopelessness of their situation that had brought them on but something else. Then slowly realisation dawned. Sighing, he took one of the big maquis' hands and held it between his own.

"Chakotay," he said quietly. "You didn't rape me. Hey, I told you last night you most likely bought us the time needed by the Captain to find us."

A tear escaped from under a closed eyelid and ran silently down Chakotay's cheek. Tom lifted his hand to brush it away.

"I didn't tell you that despite what was happening to us, I felt sensations I had never experienced before." His hand returned to cover Chakotay's. "I didn't tell you that you give great head." Tom bit his bottom lip in a vain attempt to appear innocent, but it didn't quite work and all he succeeded in doing was embarrassing himself.

Chakotay found himself looking into the blue eyes of the more than slightly flushed pilot.

"I've always wanted to do that for you," he admitted quietly, and then he laughed as Tom flushed even redder and started to cough.

"You what?" Tom all but choked out. "When the fuck since?"

"Since the early days," Chakotay replied. "When you were with us in the Maquis, I couldn't help thinking how cute you were but your straight so

I never did anything about it, and well on Voyager it was easier just to see you as an arrogant, trouble making little shit."

Tom raised an eyebrow trying to look as though he was offended by

Chakotay's last comment, but his mind was set on replaying the commander's earlier statement. The one that implied he had a thing for Tom.

He squeezed the commander's hand. "You never said anything Chakotay,"

Tom stammered slightly, "about how you were feeling. I mean, I never, I mean you tolerate me on the ship nothing more."

"It made things easier for me Tom." Chakotay sighed and changed the subject, feeling that to continue with the one they were on now would open up a tangled mess of emotions that he knew he himself couldn't cope with let alone Tom.

"Look, if it comes to it and we are taken back to the hall this evening, you have to do what Calven wants Tom. Think on it as buying us time for the Captain to find us. Think of it as a way to keep them from harming the girls."

His free hand came up to rest on top of Tom's. "Just close your eyes and pretend in your head that I'm the woman of your dreams." He squeezed Tom's hand gently.

"What if I hurt you?" Tom protested. "I mean you did all those things to me to make it easier, and I'm still a little sore."

Chakotay gazed into the concerned blue eyes of Voyager's chief pilot and his own personal provider of wet dreams.

"I'll prepare myself a little later, you don't have to worry, and things would have been better if we had had some sort of lube. That's why you're sore. I'm sorry."

Their conversation ended when they heard movement outside the door of their cell. Tom stood and turned just as the young guard that had given them the water the previous night stepped in with a plate of food and a jug of fresh water.