I would like a mine in my community because it would help our economy. And I could get a job.
And if it was a gold mine, I'd stake a claim and become rich.

And if another miner was blackmailing me or threatening me, I'd knock him out
and steal his tag so people didn't know he was down in the mines. hahaha, Just kidding.
I'd steal gold and blame it on the guy.

If I owned my own mine, I'd probably convince people it was full of gold.
And when they went to steal my gold, they'd find my mine full of fish.
And then I'd block the entrance to the mine with a boulder and keep the people trapped in there,
and they'd have to survive by eating fish.
And then they'd start a race of sub-terrainian Morlock people and they'd try to destroy
all the normal people who lived above ground because they were jealous of our sun.
I think that would be a good joke.