Part 64

Disclaimer and Copyrights

Daniel rolled over on the sofa and slowly cracked his eyes open.  Startled by what he saw next in the dimly lit room he sat up straight - for sitting on the coffee table was a person, watching him.

"Sorry." Graham smiled shyly as he held out his hand out in placation to the startled man.

"How long have you been there?" Daniel asked him as he rubbed sleep from his eyes.

"Not long."  His smile grew as he watched the other man frantically trying to wake up properly.  "I forgot you snore.."

With a soft growl Daniel sat up and pushed the bedding back.  "Thanks for reminding me."

Graham chuckled. "That's okay. " He tilted his head back as he watched Daniel stumble to his feet.  "Where are you going?"

"You're here... won't that mean that Jack..?"  Daniel looked around and realized it was still dark outside.  He squinted and moved closer to the mantel clock, seeing that it was almost five in the morning.

"It's five o'clock?" Daniel exclaimed, turning back to look at Graham, still sitting on the coffee table. 

"I couldn't sleep at the hospital," Graham said with a dismissive shrug as he got to his feet. 

In confusion Daniel tilted his head and asked, "So you thought you'd come by.. here?"

"Well, after I got no response at your place.... I did.."

"You went to my apartment?" Daniel asked, his voice rising slightly in question. 

Graham gave a shy smile as he cringed and said, "I know. Desperate, huh?"

"I guess that depends," the older man said, putting his hands on his hips then realized he was bare-legged.  Quickly he reached for his pants and pulled them on, much to Graham's amusement. 

 "I've seen your legs before," he commented as he sat in Jack's favorite chair.  Daniel rolled his eyes but continued to pull his pants on regardless.  "And what does it depend on?"

 "Huh?" Daniel reached for his glasses on the coffee table now and slipped them on.  Graham couldn't help his smile.

 "I said, what does it depend on?"

 With a throat clearing cough, Daniel said, "On what you're here for..?"

 Holding his hands open, Graham said, "To talk.."

 Daniel smoothed his hand through his ruffled hair then met the other man's eyes.  "Talk?"

 "Or to resume a talk, I should say."

 "Oh," Daniel said as he moved over to the sofa, his unfastened belt clinking quietly with each step.  He tugged his pant legs up as he settled onto the sofa. 

 "Talking was always your strong point," Graham said, before he smiled timidly.  "You always wanted us to talk more."

 "Not at five am," Daniel mumbled.

 "Sorry.  I didn't wake you up though. You woke up on your own."

 "I'm sure having someone sitting watching me sleep had something to do with that."

 "Well, if that's the case it took you a while - I've been here about an hour."

 Daniel frowned. "You're kidding?"

 "No.  Jack told me where he kept his spare key.."

 "Jack did?"  The anthropologist's voice shot up slightly.

 "Yeah."  Graham's voice broke into a soft sigh as he toyed with a frayed spot on the arm of the chair.  "My father woke up, you see.."

 "Oh!" Daniel nodded, not needing any further explanation. 

 As he rubbed his face, Graham said through his yawn, "And I haven't had any sleep tonight so Jack suggested I come here to wait - maybe get some sleep.."

 With a mind still fuzzy with sleep - two whole hours of it to be exact - Daniel couldn't quite get his head around the way Graham kept referring Jack - as Jack.

 "So he sent you  - here?"  Daniel frowned, a little in disbelief.

 "The choice was mine.  He told me where the key was in his boots in the garage, just in case I wanted to come here to wait instead.. I didn't expect you to be here, remember."

 Arching his brow Daniel commented, "Well, I wasn't at home..." 

 With a sly smile, Graham shrugged.  "I know.  That was when I had to make the decision.  To come here knowing you were here.. or to go home instead.."

 "And you came here?"  Daniel said, pointedly.

 The dark eyes looked down a moment, shielded by long black lashes, then Graham looked up and met Daniel's gaze.  "Being in that garden with you tonight.."  He paused then bit his top lip for a second before playing nervously with the frayed spot as he spoke.  "It really meant a lot to me.."

 Daniel blinked quickly and tilted his head as he let his eyes drift to the darkened corner of the room where the firelight hadn't reached.

 Graham went on, "It reminded me of what we were like.."

 With a faint smile, Daniel kept his eyes averted as he said, "Yeah, did."

 As he rolled his head back Graham peered at him through partly closed eyes as he said, "It was nice to have someone in my corner for once." A little shyly he added, "You *were* saying that.. weren't you?"

 Daniel's smile grew slowly.  "Absolutely."

 Graham gave a slightly more confident smile in return.  "Thank god." He laughed softly now and it was obvious he was relieved that he hadn't just made a complete fool of himself.  It was on the tip of his tongue to ask what it was Daniel felt for him now, but he didn't feel brave enough.  Just this much had turned his legs to jello and made his heart thump quickly in his throat. 

 After a few moments of silence between them - that wasn't awkward because his thoughts were occupied with the strange feeling of peace he felt now that he'd made this hurdle with Daniel - Graham looked up and saw that his companion was watching him closely.  "And Thank 'you'," he added quietly.

 Daniel's face twitched with a shy smile then he reached over and patted Graham's fidgeting hand.   "I think you were overdue to know that someone cared about you."  

 Under Daniel's hand Graham's hand turned so that it faced palm up and his fingers stroked the inside of the older man's wrist lightly.  "I appreciate that.."

 Daniel looked down at where he was being softly caressed, the sensation sending a tingle throughout his body and down to his toes. 

 "Do you, agh.. Do you want a coffee?" He asked nervously as he slipped his hand from the touch and rose to his feet. 

 Dropping his hand into his lap Graham shook his head and looked up. "Do you think he'd have stuff to make hot chocolate?"

 "Well, he's got a can of that fake cream in the fridge.."  Daniel replied, as he pointed absently to towards the kitchen.

 "That'll do." Graham shrugged.  The blond man nodded before going towards the kitchen. 

 Graham sighed heavily, wondering if he'd read the signs wrong as he sat forward and buried his face in his hands.  Perhaps Daniel didn't feel pity for him, and perhaps he did care about him - but none of that really added up to what Graham wanted it to.  Growling as his cheeks grew hotter the young man wished he'd never embarrassed himself by coming here.  He was grasping at straws - obviously. 

 He looked up again when he heard the sound of scuffling beside him.  Daniel was holding a cup of frothy hot chocolate out to him.

 "Thanks," he said in a tight voice, taking the drink as he sat back in the chair.  Daniel pushed past him to sit on the sofa, putting an identical drink down.  They were silent for a while then Daniel sighed as he looked around.

 "You know what you were saying earlier, about Jack shutting down?"

 "Yeah."

 "What about you?  If you go to Arlington who's going to be there to help you?"

 "I'll be fine," Graham said as he took a cautious sip of the hot drink.  The soft moan told Daniel that he'd made it just right for him. 

 "I meant what I said," Daniel broached the subject tentatively. Graham noticed that and saw his opportunity to broach the subject again.

 "That what you feel for me isn't pity?"  There was a weak smile in answer so Graham shrugged and asked, "So can I ask - at the risk of my pager going off again.."

 Daniel laughed now, low and soft as the Graham he knew shone through. 

 "What it is you do feel for me?"

 Swallowing as he considered that question, Daniel studied his hands.  Graham waited a few moments then asked, "Dan?"

 As he held his hand up, the older man said, "Give me a minute.."  He met the dark eyes and smiled, "Please."

 "Sure.  Didn't know you were still trying to work it out," Graham said frankly.

 Rolling his eyes slightly, Daniel joked, "It's only been a year, give me some time!"

 They both laughed gently now as Graham said, "Sure, hate to be accused of rushing you."

 "You can rush me, if you like," Daniel said under his breath.  Graham heard it and frowned, not sure if Daniel was flirting with him or not. 

 Taking a risk, he quipped, "Love to.."

 Daniel, biting on his top lip, lifted his eyes and looked at the other man.  "Pardon?"

 Shaking his head, Graham dismissed his off-hand comment and occupied himself with his drink.  He felt the scrutiny of the blue eyes upon him and deliberately looked around the room before he reached to put his drink down.

 "Ah, do you know where the bathroom is in this place?"

 Daniel frowned. "How long has Philip lived here, and you don't know that?"

 Getting to his feet, Graham smoothed out the front of his jeans with his hands. "I never visited him here.  He didn't want me to."

 "Oh," Daniel said as he got to his feet now as well. He led Graham through the house and towards the bathroom.  Along the way they passed the bedroom.  Graham paused outside the door. 

 "Wow. It's so neat!"

 Daniel came back and stood in the doorframe with him.  "Actually, it was a pigsty," he confessed then looked down into Graham's eyes.  "I tidied it up."

 The lieutenant screwed his nose up as he said, "Choice!"

 Daniel grinned. "Not my preferred way to spend a Friday night, but..." He pointed to the door in the room.  "You can reach the bathroom through there."

 Graham stepped into the bedroom and gave the bed a wide berth as he crossed to the other door. 

 When he came out of the room he saw Daniel sitting on the end of the bed, waiting for him.

 "I wasn't going to steal the guest soap," the younger man said, coming to stand before him.  Daniel grinned as he looked up.

 "Actually, I thought, seeing as you haven't been here before, that you might like to see Phil's room.."  He got up and stepped around his companion.

 "Phil's room?" Graham followed him around the corner to the spare room then stepped inside the partly opened door. "I wondered where all his stuff was hiding in this place.  Does this mean that he and Jack weren't..?"

 Daniel shook his head.  "I have no idea. But I do know he liked to spend a lot of time in here."

 Graham went to the easel and looked at the sketches on there. The paper was brittle, wrinkled and stained while some of the images were smeared beyond recognition from the use of the steamer in the room.  Those that were intact were not as good as he knew his brother could draw and he came to the sad realization that Phil's talent had gone some time ago.  "So sad," he muttered to himself.  Daniel came to stand behind him as he looked at the work.

 "He was so talented," Graham said as he filed through the papers, finding one half-finished sketch after the other.  "And it's all gone.."

 Daniel chewed his bottom lip lightly as he watched Graham look around the room, aware that he was growing more and more distressed as he discovered little things about his brother's life that he didn't realize existed.  He pulled open the top drawer of the cabinet beside the bed and saw Phil's personal CD player in there.  He hit play and held an ear-bud up to his ear in order to hear it.  The song was 'Air that I breathe' and Graham quickly turned it off and pushed the player back into the drawer, slamming it shut.  He leaned against the cabinet and bowed his head. 

 Daniel stepped up behind him silently and gripped his shoulders in his hands.

 "Sorry," the younger man mumbled. 

 Daniel squeezed him firmly then kissed the back of his head as he whispered, "It's okay."

 "That damn song.." He said, as he shook his head and inhaled a deep breath.  He looked up and saw Daniel in the reflection of the window.  "It was their song, he told me.."

 Daniel held the dark eyes in the reflection.  "I know."

 With a heavy sigh, Graham turned slightly to look over his shoulder at Daniel. "He wants it at his funeral."

 The older man nodded as he squeezed the shoulders once more.  Graham slowly shook his head then stepped away from the touch, going over to the easel and picking up a stubby lead pencil.  He toyed with it in his hand, looking over it like it held the meaning of life for him. 

 "I'm sure Jack wouldn't care if you took stuff from here.."

 Graham swallowed as he shook his head.  "No. It's all Jack's stuff now.."  He put the pencil down and left the room.  Daniel ran his hand through his hair until it came down and cupped the back of his neck.  He sighed forlornly. 

 *

The young man was over by the fireplace, feeling the warmth of the flames seep through his clothes and skin, hoping it might reach the cold hard lump in the pit of his stomach.  The rest of the room was still dark - neither man had bothered to switch on a lamp yet which meant that the only light came from the fire.

 "I'm sorry," Daniel said from the top step as he watched his downhearted friend.  Graham turned to look at him.   "I didn't mean to make you feel worse.."

 With a derisive snort, Graham shook his head as he returned to the chair he had been sitting in.  "It's not your fault, Dan.  It all just kind of brings home the fact that he's going.. you know... and I can't reach him anymore..." He shook his head. "I can't get my little brother back - any more."

 Daniel came back to the sofa and sat down.  He faced Graham and leaned in to listen to the softly spoken man.

 "There's this big chunk of his life that I know nothing about, and .. that's really weird to know, because - well, we've always been so close.  I guess I noticed we were drifting apart a bit, but it didn't seem odd at the time and I just accepted it, but now.. here," He held his hand out and indicated to the house, "I realized that the only person who really knew me, and who I thought I really knew.. was a stranger to me in so many ways."

 "But you were still very close," Daniel said.

 "Sure, yeah." Graham nodded, a little too enthusiastically as he bowed his head.  "But he wasn't my little brother anymore. He was Jack's lover.. Jack's partner.. He was.. Jack's.."  He gave a shrug as if to say 'I can't express it any differently'. 

 "But Jack knew there were parts of Phil that could never be his, because they were yours.  He respected that Philip was your brother and he never overstepped that delicate boundary between being your C.O. and his lover.. Does that make sense?"

 "Most of what you say makes sense to me, Daniel," he admitted. 

 The anthropologist smiled and nodded. "Well, thanks."

 Graham looked at him a long moment then he said, "I'm going to miss you, too," then he added, with a slight shrug, "When I go.."

 As he inhaled a breath, Daniel nodded again and asked, "Do you have to go..?"

 Rolling his eyes, Graham answered, "At the risk of sounding melodramatic, what will I have to keep me here?"

 After a moment's hesitation - when it ran through Daniel's mind to confess his feelings - the anthropologist simply said, "We covered this before.. Your job?"

 "I love my work at the SGC, but I can't go home to that apartment.. Not like it is, and I can't imagine ever being comfortable there without him..."

 "I know what you mean.  Jack feels the same way about stepping through the Gate again.  He doesn't think he can, knowing that it should have saved Philip in someway.."

 "That kind of thinking is only going to make him crazy.  We all know there's nothing that can be done for Phil.."

 Daniel rolled his eyes as he looked down at his feet. Guilt of knowing more than he should flared his cheeks momentarily.  He knew about the timely conversation on the Red Phone that made Hammond snap to attention and put Sam on a secret mission to solve the mysteries of the alien technology they had stored within the Base.  He knew that nearly everything that could be done was being done at that moment, considering Sam's determination to make it work. But he also knew that time was running out and that - despite all the effort - Philip would probably die before the Calvary could arrive. The fact that they'd all been sworn to secrecy made things easy and hard at the same time. Easy, because what Jack and Graham didn't know couldn't haunt them in years to come, knowing how close it *might* have been.  Hard, because it wasn't easy to watch two men he cared so much about go through this with *no* hope whatsoever. 

 He changed the subject and faced the reality instead. "I hear there's a loft for lease in my building."

 Graham's mouth twitched with a smile. "The company would be tempting.."

 That candid confession drove all previous thought from Daniel's mind.  He tilted his head to meet the dark gaze.  "Would it?"

 The younger man's head jerked slightly.  "I think so.."

 Daniel's lips parted slightly as he lowered his gaze and stared at the floor. "We could play monopoly and pass the time..." He lifted his face, his nose was crinkled slightly from his smile and faint dimples appeared on his cheeks.  "I'll even make you hot chocolates.."

 Graham stared at him then shook his head as he asked, sincerely, "How can you treat me like this?"

 Daniel raised his brows higher than the rim of his glasses as he asked, "Like what?"

 "Like a friend.  Like someone you actually care about? 

 "Because you are.  And.. because.. I do."

 "Really?" Graham's frown deepened.

 Daniel stared back at him for a few moments then felt a sudden rush of nervousness creep up his spine.  "That.... that surprises you?" 

 "After what I did to you?" Graham asked in a soft, incredulous tone.

 With a slight tilt of his head, Daniel asked, "Never heard of forgiveness?"  His intense gaze shifted between the black eyes, but never left them.

 The younger man's mouth moved slightly like he was forming the words but unable to say them.  Finally he asked, "Are you saying you've forgiven me... for ... for ...Chris?"

 Quickly Daniel's face contorted with emotion before he said, in a low, soulful whisper, "Of course!" Graham watched the way his lips moved as he spoke, his words so full of passionate expression.

 "Do you really think what we had was that special?" Graham asked him finally, knowing that he did - he thought that what they had was probably the most important relationship in his life, to date. He couldn't ever imagine having another either..  

 Daniel frowned momentarily then rolled his eyes, as he looked towards the darkened corner once more. Digging his thumbnail into the quick of his other thumb, he said, "What do you think?"  With a heavy sigh he went on, "A year after.. that... and I'm still caring about you?" Now he gave a slightly embarrassed smile as he lowered his eyes to his hands once more, "Or does that just make me pathetic?" 

 "At first I thought that you were being.. well.. 'you' and treating me with the same politeness you greet visitors through the Gate with.  On the surface it's friendly but under it all - beneath it all - you felt nothing really for them.. or me.. in this case."

 "You.. Do you really think this has all been some kind of charade?" He asked as he twirled his finger in the air slowly indicating the room.

 "I don't know!" Graham said then shifted in the seat and leaned back, arching slightly as he ran his hands through his thick, short hair.  "God, I'm so screwed up at the moment!"

 "I know!"  Daniel said.  Graham heard more though. He heard 'I understand that' and slowly he turned back to look at the man beside him.  Daniel's eyes seemed to soften as he gazed at him. 

 "I can't seem to think straight!" The lieutenant told him. 

 With a flicker of a smile, Daniel said, "I understand."  This time Graham knew he meant 'I know that too!'.  He frowned as he stared back into the blinking blue eyes.  "Why don't I leave you alone for a minute.  I'll make another drink.. run around the block.. do 'something'.."

 Graham stood as Daniel went to go. "Dan, please.. Let's talk about this.."

 Shaking his head, the older man said, regretfully, "This isn't the time to talk.  You said it yourself, you're confused.. You can't think straight.. We're likely to say something we might regret." He stared intently at Graham then shook his head and went out of the room, angry with himself for confusing the young man at a time he didn't need this kind of additional problem.

 Graham sat down again, growling as he covered his face.  They were getting along so well, why did he have to ruin it by challenging Daniel?  He always pushed too hard, never secure in the fact that Daniel was always who he said he was - nothing more, nothing less.  He knew now, as he sat wilting in the chair, that Daniel's capacity to love - either sexually or platonically - overwhelmed him. He always felt tricked by people - and found it hard to accept that someone like Daniel could seek him out as a friend, or even a lover.  He was unaware of the eyes that watched him from the dining room as he rocked forward and growled into his hands. 

 After a few short moments he heard a click - the kind of noise knees make when someone squats - then he felt a light touch around the back of his head.  Lowering his hands slowly he saw Daniel crouched in front of him.  Before he could say a word the older man shifted onto his knees, steadying himself by placing his other hand onto Graham's thigh as he closed the gap between them.  Graham inhaled quickly before Daniel's soft lips touched his - capturing them in a tender touch.  The long fingers splayed across the black hair as Daniel tugged him closer, opening the kiss with a hesitant tongue.  

 Gently their tongues jousted, rekindling passions that had been on hold within them both for over a year.  Daniel moaned softly as he dropped his arm down Graham's back and slipped the other hand up Graham's thigh, wrapping it around the body in order to squeeze him into a tighter embrace.  The younger man responded by cradling the blond head in both hands and delving his fingers into the soft, silky strands, digging gently against the scalp. 

 Breathlessly they pulled back and Daniel searched the contended face closely.   As he swiped his tongue across his own bottom lip he said, in a deep, husky voice, "I wanted to clear the air.. between us.." He gave a soft cough then bit his lips together. 

 Graham blinked slowly as he said, "Well, that.. I think that.. did it.."

 Both smiled dopily now.  "You sure?"  Daniel asked, as he removed his glasses and twisted to put them on the table behind him. 

 As he turned back around Graham cupped his cheeks in his warm palms.  "Unless you meant something else in that kiss?"  He rubbed his thumb across Daniel's bottom lip.

 "Well, it wasn't pity.." The older man said with a wry smile.

 Graham pressed his thumb to the lips, denting the pliable surface.  "But is it misguided, just the same?  You're not just feeling something for me because of the situation we're all in?"

 Wetting his lips with a quick tongue again, Daniel shuffled on his knees as he moved closer. "What I feel for you - I've felt for the past year, Grae.  If you want to talk about pathetic..  I've never gotten over you."

 Graham bent his head lower and kissed the rise of Daniel's cheek tenderly. "I never got over you either.  Never got over the fact that you wanted to be with me in the first place.." Graham smiled nervously as he stared back into the blue eyes. 

 Incredulously, Daniel asked, "Why?" He cupped Graham's flushed face between both hands as he said, passionately, "I loved you.." 

 Graham closed his eyes slowly.

 "I still do.." Daniel told him without hesitation. He watched the long lashes flutter before the eyes opened.  He gave the distressed man an encouraging smile as he brushed his thumb over Graham's cheek.  "Do you believe that yet?"

 With a soft laugh, Graham nodded.  "Oh, yeah.."

 Daniel laughed as he squeezed the face lightly.  "Good!"

 Graham tentatively reached to touch Daniel's warm neck.  As he traced his fingertips down the thick vein that reached down inside the top the older man was wearing, he mumbled, "God, our timing is shit, isn't it?" He looked into the watchful gaze. 

 Daniel smiled. "It could be better but let's take what we have, huh?"

 The other man nodded as he laughed softly. "Don't worry.  I don't intend to let you go this time.."

 With a gentle nod, Daniel got to his feet and moved to the sofa.  Graham waited a moment, seeing that he was making room for him, then he pushed up out of the chair and joined Daniel, with some trepidation.  They sat entangled; arms around each other and legs straight out and overlapping each other's. 

 As he rested his cheek against Daniel's chest, Graham rubbed his fingertips against the sweater his partner was wearing as he mumbled, "I didn't think I'd ever get this chance again."

 Daniel ran his hand through the thick, short hair then cupped it over the small ear. He pressed his lips against the tall forehead as he ran his other hand up along Graham's arm to rest on his shoulder.  "Me, either."

 Graham looked up into his eyes.  "I can believe that I've felt like I have for you all this time.. But you? For me..?"

 Daniel stared into the dark eyes, realizing that Graham's father must have stripped his self-esteem bare in his formative years, and again over the past twenty-four hours.  He trailed his finger down Graham's nose then lightly pinched his chin as he asked in a deep, low voice, "When will you realize how special you are?" 

 With a slight roll of his eyes, Graham confirmed Daniel's fears.  Gently the older man angled the handsome face up in order to meet it with his lips.  The kiss started out tender but shallow, tongues idly played as each man enjoyed the simplicity of the entanglement.

 After a few moments Graham deepened the kiss and snaked his hand up inside Daniel's top but the older man, without disturbing the tonguing, pressed the hand away from the nipple it was seeking.  When they pulled back finally Daniel told Graham gently, "We're not having sex.."

 Surprise lit the dark eyes as if the mere notion was something Graham hadn't thought about, but Daniel knew how sexual he was  - how sexual they both were with each other - and he needed to lay that ground rule down already.

 "Not yet," Daniel told him firmly and clearly indicated that the thought was not out of the question, just not practicably now. "I don't think we need that complicating everything else.."

 Wetting his lips as he stared at the pink, full mouth, Graham said, "Oh, I agree.. I just.. like touching you.."

 Daniel's mouth twitched with a smile.  "Touching me was all you ever needed to do.." He pushed his free hand through his hair as he sighed softly. 

 "You make it sound like you were a slut for me," Graham teased lightly. 

 Daniel looked deeply into his eyes and said, honestly, "I was." He stroked his fingers down Graham's sideburn while he whispered as he closed the gap between them again, "I was.." 

 Their tongues met in a heated kiss now as they squirmed together to try to get closer, deeper, nearer to each other.  Graham slipped himself onto Daniel's lap, to straddle him in a kneeling position as he devoured the other man's mouth and tongue enthusiastically. Again his hands, both of them this time, snaked under the sweatshirt and simultaneously discovered the hardened nipples inside.  His thumbs rubbed across them, and he felt the deep groan vibrate through the older man's body as he pinched them with experienced fingers. 

 Daniel wasn't resisting him either.  His hands rubbed up and down the solid thighs then, when his nipples were pinched, he reached for and grabbed Graham's ass.  He enjoyed the feel of the spread butt over him as he rubbed his palm into the indentation of the cheeks and stretched his fingers to reach between the thighs. Graham growled this time, enjoying the hand that was slipping over his thigh and onto his cloth-covered crotch.  He thrust against the fingers as they sought out his hardened cock, then he gave an encouraging purr as he brought his own hand down and steered Daniel's hand even closer. 

 They both laid down as Daniel guided Graham under him.  He stretched out over the sturdy body to keep the contact with the eager mouth.  As Graham's head hit the pillow behind him the kiss broke, and both men gasped for air.  Daniel looked around them, at the room that was growing lighter with the dawning of the day outside.  Graham looked around them as well then, when they looked back at each other it was Daniel who spoke first.

 "We shouldn't be doing this.." He said with a dry throat.

 Graham nodded.  "This.. this is not.. right.. No."  He shuffled himself up onto his elbows and looked at the room before he focused on Daniel's face once more. 

 The anthropologist looked down at the bedding they were spread across.  "Phil's going to be here.."

 Graham nodded.  "Just what I was thinking.." he said solemnly.  Daniel nodded and shifted himself off the sprawled body and sat on the edge of the sofa as he pressed his face into his hands. 

 Graham sat up behind him, then turned and kissed the back of his neck between the long hair.  "You're such a slut," he teased his partner playfully.

 "And you love comfort sex.." Daniel said before he realized what he'd said.  Graham frowned then shuffled himself to sit up beside Daniel.

 "Pardon..?"

 "Oh God.." Daniel sighed as he covered his mouth with his hand. "Grae, I didn't mean.. to say that..."

 "But it was what you were thinking?" Graham said, frowning as he tried to work through the sudden gut-wrenching feeling that suddenly gripped him.

 Daniel closed his eyes.  He couldn't deny that because it was too obvious that he had been.

 "You told me you forgave me.." Graham said quietly.

 Bowing his head Daniel nodded. "I do.  I have.. but - I guess I just can't forget.."

 "I won't do it to you again, Dan.."

 "I know!  That's not what I was thinking.  I wasn't worried that you were just after me for a lay, Grae.. I think we're both a little beyond that kind of thinking!"

 Graham searched the earnest face as he nodded slowly.

 "But I can't also deny the fact that you and I .. we.. love sex.."

 A smile tugged at Graham's mouth and created a dimple in one unshaven cheek. "No denying that."

 Daniel smiled now at the expression on Graham's face.  With a deep growl he clearly indicated that Graham was 'very' appealing right now.  Shaking his head Daniel laughed as he said, "But I also know how you used to crawl back to bed after an argument with Philip and .." He shrugged.

 "Got out my frustrations by fucking you like there was no tomorrow?" Graham suggested, helpfully.  Daniel laughed as he bowed his head and nodded.

 "Yeah, something like that..." He looked up into the dark eyes once more.  "And while my body craves that again.. My mind.. I can't let it be for that reason.  I'm sure you can understand that?"

 Graham searched the face closely then nodded.  "Yeah, you're right, Dan.  Maybe we shouldn't go there just yet.. I think we've established that we both want to.."

 Daniel nodded then laughed gently as he reached his hand out to cup Graham's knee. 

 The younger man continued, "But just not yet. The next few days.. they're going to be hard enough to cope with without adding to it all.. So let's just give ourselves a few days.  Is that what you're saying?"

 Daniel agreed as he squeezed Graham's knee.  "I'll be here for you, you know that!" He said earnestly.  Graham acknowledged that by running his hand over the one on his leg. 

 "I know.  And that's going to make everything a lot easier to cope with, believe me." 

 Daniel blinked then reached over for a tender kiss.  Pulling back he whispered as he slowly opened his eyes, "We can still kiss though? Right?"

 Graham chuckled. "Such a slut.."

 "Shut up." Daniel laughed as he closed his mouth over Graham's again.

 <End of part 64>

Disclaimer and Copyrights

Stories on this page are the property of Nessessitee and Slida.  Please do not copy these without the written permission of the Author.  All Rights are acknowledged for MGM, Gekko and Stargate Productions as to the Copyrights of the characters within this story and no infringement on the copyrights are intended.  For the Bombshells Series the character of Philip Simmons is entirely the creation and intellectual property of Nessessitee and Slida.  

While the performances given by RDA and MS help to fuel the author's desire to write for their characters in a niche that she feels is present on the actual show, the portrayal of their characters in loving relationships in no way reflects the Author's opinion of the men's private life, nor should it be construed in that manner.

Back