Blood of my Heart, Beloved of my Soul

Part IX

Rating :PG 14 some light sexual innuendo

It had been two and a half weeks since Kataya had joined the SGC and things were going well. While Merdwin was still there to help out, they had worked to find which personnel might have the ability to activate the links.

It turned out that Samantha Carter, Sgt. Davis, Lt. Simmons, and Daniel had proven to be sensitive and all of them except Daniel had begun training. Kataya thought Teal'c should have been able to activate a link, but thought his symbiote was interfering in some way. They were working on it.

Both Sam and Daniel were extremely sensitive. Sam and Kataya were working intensively and Sam was beginning to activate the link more than she failed. Daniel was sensitive as well, but he didn't feel comfortable with Merdwin and had been `too busy' to do a training session with Kataya.

Artereos had agreed that Merdwin should continue to be the liaison for the time being and he had already made a few trips between the Furling world and the Tau'ri, delivering swords to O'Neill, Teal'c and Daniel.

Kataya had contacted her father and given exact instructions on a sword to be made specifically for Samantha Carter. She'd also instructed Merdwin to make sure the circlet he was making for Sam would calibrate perfectly with the sword.

Samantha Carter, in Kataya's opinion had untapped strengths and intended to make Samantha her apprentice, learning the ways of the Katteri, at least as far as being able to utilize the energy. She could not manifest physically, without going through the fire and being reborn, but the potential for energy abilities was there regardless. Sam would learn to fence and then to use her energy with the sword.

Both Teal'c and O'Neill had astonished everyone with their immediate understanding and ability to use them. Not having the energy resources that the Furlings had and despite them not being practical weapons, the swords had proven to be an enjoyable new exercise for the two men and an exciting display for personnel to watch. General Hammond had even been induced to show his abilities with his much more ornate weapon.

Only Kataya and Merdwin had so far refused to show what they could do with their weapons. The Marines thought it was because O'Neill and Teal'c could beat them with their own weapons. O'Neill figured it was because they didn't want to tear hell out of the room. Teal'c came the closest with his observation that perhaps they did not wish to manifest something they felt to be very personal without good cause. He suspected that using the sword could cause the Katteri-enti physical manifestation to take place, at least to some extent.

SG1's scheduled meet-and-greet had been postponed until tomorrow. It was to be a routine mission; a perfect chance to try out their new skills in an off-world, non-combat situation.

They had contacted the Tok'Ra. Jacob was on assignment but was due to arrive at the SCG in about four days. In the meantime, SG1 was becoming a cohesive unit with its new member. Sam and Kataya's immediate liking of one another had deepened into friendship.

Sam and Daniel had talked about his situation but Daniel refused to question Kataya. As far as Daniel could tell, he had told Sam, "It's as if I don't exist most of the time." Sam had agreed it was a little odd if what Daniel suspected was true. She couldn't see a way to resolve it, but she was working on it.

Her own romantic quandaries would, she hoped, come to some sort of resolution soon. In the meantime, she was learning to activate her link with the other members of the team. She really wanted to be able to use her new skills tomorrow off-world.

Sam and Kataya were working on Sam's ability to activate the mind link. They had been working on the activation of the link with Sam using Kataya's circlet and she'd activated the link at least a half a dozen times with Daniel and four times with Teal'c. Sam was amazed at how much energy it took to activate it. Kataya thought that would get better with practice. Sam was feeling tired.

"Do you suppose it would help if we all had circlets?" Sam asked. The stones response to the energy patterns intrigued her.

"Merdwin is bringing some for you and the others, as well as armbands. He should be here before long. Tomorrow will be an
excellent trial run to see how well the bands work. Pack your circlet. I want to try it out in field conditions."
Kataya lit some candles. They smelled of roses and musk, a scent Sam recognized as Kataya's.
"Don't give the circlet to me yet," Kataya instructed her.

"I'm feeling drained, Kataya. I'm almost too tired to move."

"I am going to help you to feel better. Close your eyes." Sam followed her instructions. "I want you to concentrate on how you feel."

"Okay. I'm feeling tired."

"Do you wish to go to sleep?"

"No, not that tired. I feel like I just want to sit down in a comfortable chair, put my feet up for a while, and relax."

"Do you feel the stones warming? Can you tell which one it is?"

"Yes. I think it's the topaz."

"I want you to visualize the sun. I want you to see the sun's energy flowing into the stone and from there into you. It is feeding your energy fields. When the stone begins to feel uncomfortably warm, tell me."

A little later, Sam was aware of the topaz getting hot. "It's hot.”

"All right. Imagine a huge forest of trees and meadows full of green grass and red flowers. Can you see them?"

"Yes."

"They are sending you waves of green and red energy. Watch the energy spiral towards you. Let it flow from the stones into your energy fields. Again, when they get almost too warm, tell me." They sat quietly for a long time.

"It's beginning to get warm but it still isn't hot. I think I feel better though."

"Watch and gather in the spiral a little longer, please."

"Twenty minutes later, Sam said, "It's getting uncomfortable."

"Excellent. Envision the blue sky. Imagine it wrapping you in waves of blue energy. Absorb them. The blue topaz and the sapphire should warm."

Almost an hour later, Sam said, "It's getting hot."

"All right, now for the last stone." Kataya came and sat behind her. "You will probably fail at this one, Samantha. It is to be expected. Often it takes many years to master this particular stone's energy-giving power. You've pulled energy from the world around you, from Nature. Now you will close your eyes again and you will see a vast lonely blackness. It is cold and empty. It is the infinity of the universe."

Kataya spoke in a soft, melodious voice, almost but not quite, chanting.

"I see it." Sam's voice sounded nervous. "It's so large, so empty."

Kataya's voice came back to her even more softly, "No, Samantha, it only looks so at first. See over there? The darkness is beginning to change to become a deep velvety purple."

"I can see it. It's so far away," she said plaintively.

"It is coming closer. There are jewels shimmering in the sky. They are brilliant drops of light setting the velvet curtain of the universe alight with a multitude of purple tones. They are the stars of your world, Samantha, sparkling, glittering and blazing in the sky around you. There are misty spirals scattered about your universe. Clouds and nebulas."

"Yes, yes, I see them."

"They are energy, Samantha, as are the stars. In fact, all of this, when put together, transforms your empty universe into a wildly pulsating, living being ablaze with enormous amounts of energy. Call it Samantha; try to bring it to you."

Several minutes later Sam cried out, obviously frustrated, "I can't. It won't come to me but I can feel it all around me."

"It' ok, Sam, I'll help you." Kataya positioned herself more closely behind Sam and placed her hands on her temples with her fingers on the circlet. Then she began to speak.

Sam didn't understand the words but she had heard this type of song before. It was like a Gregorian Chant and it was beautiful. “Onewellwyn Avilionium Sanctisorium wyn...Wiccadium, Cadwaellon, Tau'riellon...Alphellyn, Omegellyn, Universium...unisillium Maestllyn allaewon wyn Universium.”

As Kataya chanted, Samantha began to tremble and then to laugh in wonder. The amethyst stone in the circlet on her forehead glowed brightly. Samantha had joined with the Universe for the first time. "Kataya, that was fantastic. What exactly happened?"

"You are learning to utilize the energy around you. This time, I had you use the parts of nature that I use. The next time perhaps you can choose the things you prefer. As you learn your own energy patterns, it will take much less time to work."

"The ritual at the end may take you many years to master completely. It took me almost ten years to be able to fully contact and absorb the energy of the universe alone and I am half Furling. Don't be disappointed if you cannot do it by yourself and don't wear yourself out trying. I'll help you do it and I'll teach you the song of the All."

"You have the ability inside you to master this. However, for a replacement of your energy levels you really only have to be able to go up though the blue stones. Thankfully, the forces of nature are much easier to tap into than the forces of the universe."

"What was the song you were chanting? The words I mean."

"I am one with Avilion, the Sanctuary. Wiccadian, Furling, and Tau'ri we come to thee. You, the universe, are the beginning and the end. I would join with thee, transforming into a Master of the All, at one with the Universe.” Kataya smiled at her. “That’s a loose translation." Kataya looked seriously at Sam. "I am having a sword made for you to
my exact specifications. It isn't ready but the circlet that Merdwin will bring you will calibrate to it in perfect harmony."

"Why?"

"You have the ability and power within you to use it."

"That may be why you are giving me the sword, but why are you bothering to teach me all of these other things? You aren't teaching them to Sgt. Davis or Lt. Simmons." She paused. "Or to Daniel."

Kataya shook her head. "I don't know if I can explain it exactly. Our lives are entwined in some way. Our spirits are going to touch." She frowned slightly. "Perhaps they will even join or bond in some way. I know it is through Daniel to some extent, but I believe there is more. I wish I could explain it better but I don't know myself, yet. The
mirror of mysts shows a great amount of tears and blood surrounding us together, Sam. It is never wrong, but sometimes it can be changed. I believe that we are facing a great deal of pain and sorrow. I am also seeing a very intense battle. Only by standing together can we survive it." She looked at Sam. "I hope I haven't frightened you. I haven't seen a death. I would like you to look in the mirror, Samantha. I believe you have the sight."

Samantha swallowed. She didn't believe in such things, did she? She was a scientist, a realist, a fact-and-figures person. She wouldn't do anything so silly. "All right." She agreed.

Kataya handed Sam a small mirror, the glass surrounded with the same intricate, delicately woven gold and stones as the circlet. She looked into it and caught her breath. The mirror swirled with a smoky blue haze. Nevertheless, in and out of the haze, sudden images would appear. They came and went quickly. When the images stopped coming, she handed it back to Kataya.

"What did you see, Samantha?" Kataya asked quietly.

"Blue mist is all I saw at first, then only glimpses of things."

"Could you make anything out?"

"I saw you, holding a symbiote in your arms. You were in your Katteri uniform. You were crying."

"You had a vision of my past. That's good. Did you see a battle?"

"I think so, but it was very out of focus. I couldn't tell for sure."

"What else did you see?"

Sam swallowed. "I saw Daniel with a man. They were arguing. There was blood. You were lying on the floor and I was holding you. I was so angry with them. Kataya, the blood, I think it was yours, but I couldn't see any wounds. I think it was because of them."

"You did very well for a first time, Sam. The blood is mine but I won't die. I've seen this and the amount of blood is minimal. I don't know the man. Did you know him Samantha?"

Sam shook her head. "No, he was very out of focus, but I felt as if I should know him." She frowned again. "He was wearing BDU's. How do you know you'll be okay?"

"The amount of blood was small and Merdwin will be here. He is in the vision I see. If need be, he will sustain me with his life force and take me to Avilion to the Sanctuary."

Kataya smiled at Sam. "I know that to outsiders Merdwin appears to be a charming and engaging rogue, perhaps even a dilettante. The truth is that Merdwin is a very powerful Furling. He is the greatest Enchanter of the All and second in Katteri-enti spirit to only one."

"Who?" Sam asked, curious.

"My father, Artereos."

It was time to change the subject. Kataya stood up and turned on some lights before extinguishing the candles. She took up their previous conversation. "Merdwin will calibrate the circlet he brings for you tonight. I know he is bringing Janet one, too." She smiled and then continued. "You will find it much easier to use a circlet that is set to your particular energy patterns."

"Thank you." Sam was lost in thought. "You said Merdwin is coming today? Are the things in the mirror about to happen?"

"I believe those things are still in the future. Not the distant future or they would be much hazier. If they were going to happen as soon as tonight, I believe I would sense it, and I don't. I can't always, of course, but in this instance, I am sure the time is not yet." Kataya felt the man in the vision was not of the SGC. "I hope Merdwin is coming because he is also bringing a circlet for Janet. I'm hoping it will help Janet to link with Merdwin. Being the link for those two is exhausting." Kataya said solemnly, but her eyes started to twinkle with humor.

"They certainly seem to have really made an impression on each other. I'm not wrong, am I? It was a mutual attraction?" Sam asked.

"It was immediate and intense on Merdwin's side. I've known him all my life and I have never seen him like this."

"Janet's a really nice person. We're close friends and I don't want to see her get hurt," Sam said thoughtfully.

"I want happiness for them both. Merdwin is a wonderful man. He will treat Janet as if she is the most precious thing in the universe, because to him she is."

"You seem to know Merdwin very well. You must be as close as Daniel and I," Sam said.

"Janet hasn't told you." Kataya looked surprised.

"Told me what?" Sam asked.

"Sam, Merdwin and I are very special friends. We know each other as well as we know ourselves. He's the father of my two oldest kits."

Sam stared at her. "Janet knows that you're his wife?"

"I'm not his wife. I'm the mother of his children. We never became joined mates. He is a wonderful man. He would have joined or entwined with me at any time these past years. I refused because of exactly what has occurred. He has found a Heartmate, perhaps his Soulmate. I believe Daniel is very like him in many ways."

Sam found her voice. "I didn't know, but I think I understand. You're right about Daniel. He's a really wonderful person, too." Sam replied. "We're best friends. You're working on the link with him?"

"No. He is a very busy man." Kataya smiled wryly. "At least he appears to be covered up with work. You and I both know he is avoiding me, Samantha. He wants to know why he is having these visions, but is afraid to ask. I can't go to him. He must remember on his own."

Sam had agreed not to tell Kataya anything Daniel had told her, about the dream, or the connection he had felt with her. That was all. She cleared her throat. "I think that Daniel finds you very attractive. He can be somewhat shy around women. We're very good friends as I said, but there isn't anything romantic between us."

"I'm surprised there isn't, Sam. You make a perfect couple. I'm glad that the two of you are close friends." She looked intently at Sam. "I believe that Daniel will need a close friend. Give him all the comfort and warmth you have to give Samantha. He truly deserves it."

"I will. Daniel is very special to me." She hesitated and then said. I think I could have loved Daniel, but I'm attracted to someone else."

"Samantha, there is something I would tell you." Kataya spoke seriously. "In each lifetime we find a Heartmate, who will always be the `adored of our heart', sometimes we find more than one. It can be a wonderful and fulfilling love. I believe Daniel is your Heartmate." Sam started to protest but Kataya stopped her. "This is not a bad thing. A Heartmate can remain platonic love, or blossom into a truly passionate mating. A Heartmate remains special and adored by you even after you find your Soulmate. There is no other relationship quite like it. If this other does not turn out to be the Soulmate, remember that.

"Kataya, can I ask you something, well, personal?"

"You may ask, but I reserve the right to refuse to answer." Kataya smiled at her to take any sting there might be, out of the words."

"First I want to tell you that even though Daniel is my best friend, if I give my word I won't repeat what you say, then I won't."

Kataya looked at her steadily for some time and then nodded her head. "I believe you, Samantha Carter."

Sam nodded. "I won't tell him your answer if you tell me. I promise you. What is the relationship between you and Daniel?"

Kataya smiled softly. "Samantha, Daniel is my Soulmate. Our souls have lived countless lifetimes together. He knows this. Our relationship has always been a, volatile one. I am a Warrior. I always have been. Oddly, Daniel has always been able to accept that part of me. The part that is Katteri-enti. What he has trouble accepting is that I refuse to join our souls. I will agree only to an entwining. He chooses to forget with each lifetime. His soul is as old as mine is, so the memories remain, he can access them, and he knows all about us and what we can have together. He must remember and come to me."

"I don't understand the difference between an entwining and a joining though," Sam said, confused.

"When our souls are only entwined they can be separated. In a joining, they can't. It's the same for the heart. An entwined heart can be separated, a joined one can't. The consequences are different for each. One half can survive a joining of the heart if the other dies, if they choose to do so. In a joining of the soul, there is no choice. I wish for Daniel to have the choice."

"Are you telling me that if you agree to – to join your souls and you died in battle, Daniel would also die?"

"Yes."

"And he wanted this?"

"Yes. You must understand, Samantha. There is nothing more intense, more passionate, more enchanting and wondrous, than a full joining of the heart and soul. I've never agreed, but my resolve is weakening. Our relationship is truly complicated, Samantha, which is why I've chosen to reveal this to you. He may need you. As his Heartmate, platonic or more, you can give him immense comfort."

"I see. I see something else, too. The kind of love you have for Daniel has no room for anything but his welfare. If being my Heartmate would give him comfort and happiness, then you would freely and gladly encourage that relationship."

"Yes." Kataya answered simply, but a wealth of emotion was conveyed form one woman to the other.

Sam looked determined. "Daniel and I had a talk recently. We talked about the things you mentioned, at least, I think we're talking about the same things. We talked about the feelings we have for one another."

"I'm not going to discuss what you say, either, Sam."

Sam nodded and continued. "We accepted that the love between us is strong and deep. If circumstances had been different, we would have become lovers. I told him that although we could have a very passionate relationship; my heart is telling me to wait. I," she blushed, cleared her throat and said, "This will sound crazy, but ever since I saw the Fire Dance, I've known that passion should be like that. I want that kind of passion with my lover. Not that Daniel wouldn't be passionate, he would, I'm sure, but," she sighed. "I don't know how to explain it. Daniel and I agreed to stay loving friends. It was almost as if we were taking vows. I really do feel the word you used earlier. I adore Daniel. I feel like I always will. Daniel said he feels the same about `everything'."

"In a way, you did exchange vows, Sam, and there is nothing wrong with that. You are correct about the Fire Dance. Two souls, who share it in love, share a glorious experience. I will promise you this. If your lover is your Heartmate or Soulmate, I will invoke the Fire for the two of you to experience. You will remember it forever. And I will do it for you and Daniel. Friends do share it. Merdwin and I used to dance in the Fire together often." She said.

She smiled and said, "My heart will rejoice with you if you have found your Soulmate or a passionate Heartmate. But your friendship with Daniel is a special one. I hope your lover can understand that."

Sam blushed again. "He's not my `lover', er, not yet anyway."

"Perhaps he will be soon," Kataya said.

"I'm hoping it will happen. I should know before long now." She knew Sam didn't want to talk about it any more. She had given her friend a lot to think about. Kataya looked at the clock. "I need to take a report to the General's office."

"I need to stop by Daniel's office and the control room. Do you want to come along? Merdwin will be here soon, right?" Sam asked her.

"Okay, give me second." Kataya took the circlet she still held in her hand and returned it to her own head. She picked her clasp up and attached it to her belt. It was the one thing she seemed to wear regardless of which uniform she was wearing. She indicated her readiness to leave. They headed towards Daniel's office.

"That's a beautiful clasp, Kataya. It has special meaning doesn't it? You gave one to your 2IC when you promoted him. What does it indicate?"

"They denote rank. The far right stone indicates the level of Katteri-enti. The next indicates if you are," she frowned searching for a Tau'ri equivalent, "Airforce, army, special forces, etc…The next indicates your rank within your branch. A fourth stone, indicates you are in the elite guard of Artereos of Cadwaellon. There are only four stones on that level of the lion's crown. The fifth stone, here, on the first peak of the crown, indicates that you are both a Warrior of the Table and a Governmental Representative at the Table. The sixth stone indicates which house you represent. My father presented this clasp to me many years ago when I became a member of his elite guard. It has a great many emotional memories attached to it. With each increase in rank a stone is added or replaced by a different colored stone."

"How many more can you receive?"

"One. If I ever stop fieldwork, I will become a member of the Advisory staff of Artereos. It will be Artereos's stone. An
Emerald."

"It's beautiful," Sam said as they entered Daniel's office.

Daniel looked up from the tablet and statue he was working on and smiled at them. "What's beautiful Sam? Besides you two, that is."

"I was asking Kataya about the clasp she wears. It's their way of designating rank. She was explaining it to me and I was admiring it."

"I have to agree," he said. "It's lovely." He was staring at Kataya. "So the stones indicate what rank you hold?"

"That's correct," she replied quietly.

"How many more can you receive?" Daniel asked.

"The amethyst stones indicate the highest rank in each category except the last, which is an emerald. It's the only one I haven't received. I won't receive that until I retire from field duty and become an advisor to Artereos. I am not ready to do that yet."

There was a sudden extreme tension in the room. Sam said, " listen, I'll be right back." They never heard her leave.

"No, you're very much a Warrior, aren't you?" he asked.

"Yes, Daniel. I am." She looked at him and it was as if they'd had this conversation many times before. Daniel walked toward her. When he reached her, he caressed her cheek. She turned her head to kiss the palm of his hand. Her lips lightly caressed him and he caught his breath.

Placing his hand on the back of her neck, he cradled her head as he brought his lips down to lightly kiss and caress hers. Never had a first kiss seemed so completely right. He had known she would taste exactly like this. Her lips were sweet. He dipped his head to drink from the nectar again. This time it was no gentle testing of the waters. Daniel slipped his other arm around her and proceeded to plunder the sweetness of those lips.

He pulled her roughly towards him and melded their bodies together. Their tongue's began a dance as old as time and the kiss took on an overtone of desperation. She could feel the hard ridge of his passion pressed against her thigh. Her hips rocked his in that sensual thrust and parry, known by lovers since the beginning of time. He moved to ravish her throat with lips that were branding her with fire, leaving his mark for all to see.

She growled low in her throat, a wild untamed sound. How she wanted this man, wanted him hard and fast, no quarter asked and none given. It would be so easy to let him take her here amongst the ancient artifacts he loved so much, the knowledge and the mysteries of the ages surrounding them. As desire swirled around them, through them she gasped and forced herself to pull back.

As his arms loosened around her, he rested his forehead on hers as he drew in great gulps of air. He could feel her tremble in his arms and he wanted nothing more than to sink himself into her and lose himself forever.

She stepped back and out of his embrace, her hands and voice shaking from the storm of emotion they had just passed through. "It is always thus between us, but the reality still stands. I will always be a Warrior. You have always known this."

"Yes," Daniel answered. "I have. It made no difference in the past. It won't this time either."

Kataya broke their eye contact. "That is yet to be seen," she stated as she stepped even farther away from him. "We need to talk but not now."

"When?" Daniel asked in a tense tone of voice.

"Soon. As soon as possible."

"I want you," he stated baldly. Then he gave a short laugh. "Understatement of the year."

"Yes." Her eyes told him all he needed to know about how much she wanted him. "Samantha is coming back."

Sam entered the room almost hesitantly, as though she didn't know what to expect. She found them both looking at the tablet. They looked up as she entered and smiled at her.

<Thank you, Sam,> Kataya sent to her.

<You're welcome.> Sam sent back.

"So Daniel, we're going to the control room for a while. Want to come?” Sam asked.

The urge to stay near this woman overcame him. "Sure, why not? I could use a break." Daniel responded

"Great. Come on, let's go."

The three started down the hall chatting amicably. They were focused on what they hoped to achieve on tomorrow's mission.