Note from Echo: Okay, this is something I just felt like writing for the heck of it. Nick Carter, Howie, and Brian are the Backstreet Boys, they belong to them. The Teletubbies, Barney, and Elmo belong to whoever. The Newsies belong to Disney. Josh and Brody belong to themselves. The cow belongs to me. And uh, Leo Dicaprio belongs to himself. No offense intended.

They're Coming to Take Me Away

By: Echo

I tapped my pencil against the desk impatiently as I tried drawing the still life in art class. Key word being: tried. It's not like I was succeeding. I was actually relieved when art was over. So what if I was going to a class with my worst enemy. Brody. Just the thought of his name sent shivers down my spine. He rated almost as low as Teletubbies, Barney, and Garfield.

I was walking down the hall with Psycho, making sure she could find her locker, when Misty walked up and handed me a picture of Garfield. I shoved it back into her hands and ran away, wiping my hand on the sleeve of Brooklyn's shirt when I saw her, to get the Garfield off. She looked disgusted and wiped her arms off, saying in a very concerned voice, "Who did you wipe on me?!"

I walked in and sat down in one of the desks in the speech room. Another day in... well, it wasn't that bad. As long as there was only one Brody it couldn't get too bad. I sat down and started to read my book. But then the most horrifying thing happened... everyone in the class started singing Boot Scootin' Boogy. I banged my head against the desk. This was an ironic situation. I was the only person in the room that liked country music, yet I was one of the only people in the room seriously annoyed by that song. Well, with the exception of Brooklyn and Dice, but they weren't showing it.

I banged my head on the desk a few more times, but all of a sudden I wasn't in the desk. I must have blacked out for a while, because when I woke up, I was laying on the ground. I jumped up, ready to kill Brody for pushing me out of my desk (after all, I don't know what else could have happened). But when I looked around, I wasn't in a classroom, and Brody deffinately wasn't as good-looking as the guy I came face to face with. In fact, Brody wasn't good-looking at all!

I started laughing hysterically when I realized who this guy was. "Oh my gosh! Do you know who you are?! You aren't Brody! Did you know that?! I mean, you are Christian Bale!!!! You aren't Brody!!!! Do you know luck you are to be you?! And I am so happy you are you! You aren't Brody! Are you really you?! I mean, are you good-looking?!"

He stared at me like I was out of my mind and finally said, "Uh... Spot. I think she hit 'er head a little harder den we thought."

I frowned when I realized what a complete fool I had made of myself. "Oh look! A wall!" I said as I started banging my head against it muttering, "Stupid, stupid stupid..." the whole time.

They just stared at me for a while until someone finally yelled. "Echo! Stop!"

I turned around and saw Psycho standing there. "I'm stupid." I said slowly.

She laughed. "Tell me something I don't know."

After a few strange stares, Jack, Spot, Brooklyn, Psycho, Dice, and I all walked back to the Lodging House. I smiled evily at Psycho and then looked at Spot and said, "Hey Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore."

Brooklyn glared at me, but Psycho just smiled as Spot muttered something under his breath. She looked at him innocently (or at least, innocent for her) and said, "What was that boy? Timmy's in trouble?!"

I laughed as he gave us a confused look. I smiled. "Aw... ain't that cute. Say Rover, go fetch!" I said as I picked up a stick and threw it.

His eyes lit up and everyone stared at he chased after the stick on all fours. I rubbed my eyes. "Wow... this is even better than I thought it would be! I never thought he's actually chase the stick!"

We all watched Spot pick up the stick and start chewing on it. I walked over slowly. "Give me the stick."

He growled and I stared at Psycho for a few seconds. "Please tell me he is not serious."

She shrugged as Jack sighed and grabbed Spot's shirt collar. "Come on Spot, lets go back to the Lodging House."

Spot barked as a cat walked by and started to chase it. The cat ran up a tree, off a branch, and landed directly on my head. I screamed as I got a good look at it and realized it was Garfield. "Nooooooo!!!!!!!!! Not Garfield!!!!! Any cat but Garfield!!!!!!!!!"

Brooklyn's eyes widened in fear and she picked up a branch and tried to hit Garfield. He jumped off my head and the stick hit me instead. I screamed some as Brooklyn kept hitting me with the stick. I grabbed her hand and Psycho took the stick away. She tried to go back after the stick but I kept hold of her hand, and that's when she bit me. I screamed as I looked at my hand and saw it was red. "I'm bleeding!!! No wait, that's lipstick. But Brooklyn bit me!"

Psycho backed up. "You bit her?!"

Brooklyn pointed at me accusingly as Race started selling tickets to watch the carnies. "She wouldn't let go of my hand!"

I let out an indignant squeal. "You were hitting me with a tree branch!"

She shrugged. "So?! You wouldn't let go of my hand!"

I frowned. "Well great! I'll probably get rabies now!"

She glared at me. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard, I don't have rabies!"

I shrugged. "So what?! Spot probably does! Did you see him chewing on that stick?!"

She glared at me. "That doesn't mean I have them!"

Psycho cleared her throat. "It's transferred through saliva."

Brooklyn glared at us both as we laughed. I shook my head and started walking towards the Lodging House again. "Come on Brookle." I said as I grabbed her shirt sleeve and started dragging her. I looked at Psycho and let go of Brooklyn's shirt when I realized what had just happened. "She's gonna bite me!" I said and ran behind Jack.

Brooklyn started to chase me, but then a shocked look passed over her face. "Oh my gosh! I just understood today's Geometry lesson!"

We all stared at her in shock, until I saw Dice making out with Racetrack. I screamed. "Nooooo!!!!!! The world is coming to an end!"

Brooklyn looked at me like I was nuts, until she saw what was going on with Dice, and then her eyes almost popped out of her head. I grabbed Jack's arm. "Stop her! She can't do that! Dice is going to be a non-Catholic nun! And what will Adam think! Prom is tomorrow!"

Jack laughed. "Aw, I think you need a hug."

I nodded, perfectly happy to ignore Dice. "Okay." Jack hugged me, and leaned down to kiss me, but I screamed. "Noooooooooo!!!!! Brody! Jack is Brody! Keep him away! Keep him away!"

Psycho screamed and picked up Brooklyn's branch and started hitting Brody. "No! Leave her alone!"

He laughed his Mr. Belding (Saved by the Bell) laugh. "Oh, I think the carnies all need hugs!"

Brooklyn went white. "No! Please, spare me! Take Echo!"

"Why can't we all share?!" Said a too cheerful voice.

"Noooo!!! Anyone but Barney! Please spare me!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I smiled as Nick Carter ran up and saved me. I kissed him. "I thank you! I love you man! You saved me from the wrath of kiddie shows!"

He laughed and all of a sudden transformed into a cow named Steven! I screamed out of sheer terror as I felt my hair stand on end. "Why?! Why must I be cursed! I hate cows!"

I ran with the now green cow close behind until I saw Dice fending off Racetrack who had suddenly transformed into Tinky Winky and Brooklyn and Psycho nearby. "Help me!" I screamed as loud as I could. I ran towards the group who were all standing in a circle holding things to fend off the attacking creepy things.

I stared at Brooklyn's stick, Dice's deck of cards, Psycho's bottle of glass cleaner, and I picked up the nearest thing I could to defend myself against the advancing enemies, a fish. Brody walked up and smiled evily, followed by Barney, Spot, who was growling angrily, Tinky Winky, and the evil green cow. The cow glared at me. "Where is the flying boat?!"

I glared back. "Hey! Boats don't fly!"

The cow shrugged (don't ask how). "So, I still want to know!"

Just when I was starting to break, an ugly old blue pickup came out of nowhere and hit the cow. I smiled at Psycho. "Hey, that was my brother who got rid of the cow!"

One by one we got rid of all of the evil nice things until we all fell to the ground and laughed out of relief. "Boy, that was creepy. I mean, Teletubbies are scary enough in pictures, but in real life..." Dice said in a shaky voice.

I glared at her. "Yeah, but at least Brody didn't hug you!"

Psycho shuddered. "I don't think anything could possibly be scar-" She stopped and we all looked up as a huge ship stopped five inches in front of our group and Leonardo Dicaprio stepped off right beside Howie, Snyder, Monahan, and a giant clown.

We stared at each other for five minutes and then screamed as Leo grabbed Brooklyn's hand and started pledging his love, Monahan started chasing after Psycho, Howie started singing to me, and Snyder grabbed Brooklyn's arm.

Just when I was sure I would die of fear, marbles started flying through the air. And Josh, a new good-looking guy in my school, Brian Littrell, Will Wheaten, and Matthew Lawerence chased off the others. I smiled at Josh as Brooklyn walked to Matt, Psycho to Brian, and Dice to Will. "You are the sweetest guy ever. He laughed and wrapped an arm around me... and then he turned into Elmo. I screamed and started to run, but tripped and hit my head.

I looked up as I started to come to, and the first thing I saw was a very concerned, and good-looking Josh standing over me, along with Psycho, Brooklyn, and Dice. I stared at him for a few seconds and then screamed. "Noooo!! He's Elmo!"

Everyone gave me a funny look and right then a new student walked in. He smiled at me. "Hello, I'm Jack. Jack Kelly."

I screamed again. "Brody!!!! Keep Brody away from me!"

They all stared at me as I started laughing hysterically and the teacher called the school counselor.

The End

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