July 1, 1888

I pulled my hair back into a ribbon and walked down the hall to my friend Christopher's apartment and knocked on the door. He answered and grinned. "Hey Alex! Happy birthday!"

I smiled and pushed a few loose strands of red hair out of my smoky green eyes, trying to hide my excitement. "Same ta you. So, ya ready ta go ta Central Park?"

He nodded and grabbed his hat and a little box. "Yeah. So, how does it feel ta be five?"

I shrugged. "I dunno. What's it like ta be six?"

He crinkled his nose up. "Ah, it ain't no different den any odder day."

I grabbed his hand and ran down the street as we walked through the door. When we finally got to Central Park we sat on the nearest bench and he handed me the little box. Inside was a small silver ring that said, "Best friends". I hugged him and kissed his cheek. "It's beautiful."

He blushed a little as I pulled out the little package I had wrapped in newspaper the night before and handed it to him. He unwrapped it and smiled as he pulled out a little brown patch. "Hey, now I can be a real pirate!" He stood up and poked at the air a few times with an imaginary sword before the look on his face darkened. "Ya know, now dat I'se a real pirate, da foist thing I'se gonna do is take ya away. No one ain't gonna hurt ya no more."

"But you don't have a ship." I said sullenly.

He frowned. "Well, I'll get one some day, an' den you an' me is gonna get outta heya. Away from yer fadda', an' dis city, an' we can sail away ta find buried treasure."

"Spanish treasure?" I asked excitedly.

He nodded. "Yeah, an' Blackbeard's too. We'll find 'em all, den live in Jamaica!"

I laughed. "Yeah... where is Jamaica anyway?"

He shrugged. "I dunno. But it's by da sea."

I bit my lip. "Ya think ma'll be okay?"

He smiled. "Yeah, she can come wit us."

We spent the rest of the day talking about the different places we would go, and playing pirates with some of the kids our age. Around eight that night I finally ran back to my apartment and burst in the door. My mother sighed. "You're late Alexandria. Go wash your face and get ready for bed."

I nodded and after I had finished up I walked back out to my mother. "Will ya tell me a story?"

She nodded and told me a story about a knight rescuing a damsel in distress. When she finished I heard heavy footsteps walking up the stairs outside our door. Ma looked at the door and seemed worried for a second. She pushed me towards my room. "Now go ta bed before your father finds ya awake."

I nodded and climbed into bed just as I heard my father walk in. Before long I heard yelling and I tried to block out the noise by hiding my head under the pillow, and eventually I fell asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

July 4

I woke up and got dressed. When I walked out of my room I saw my dad standing by the table glaring at my mom. He saw me out of the corner of his eye then turned and slapped me. "What're you lookin' at?!"

I held my burning cheek and started trembling. My mother sent me a stern look. "Alex, go play with Christopher."

I stared at my father nervously and then looked at my mom. "But-"

She pointed to the door. "Go now."

I nodded and ran out the door to Christopher's apartment. He anwered when I knocked on the door. I smiled, trying to forget the concern I felt for my mother. "Hi Chris. Can ya come play?"

He looked behind him and then shook his head. "Can't play right now, but I'll come later if I can. Sorry."

I nodded and walked towards Central Park on my own. I sighed and sat on a park bench when I finally got there and watched a newsie selling his papers. I fell asleep without really meaning to, and a few hours later the newsie tapped me on the shoulder. "Hey kid, ya mind if I sit down?"

I rubbed my eyes and moved over. "Sorry, didn't mean ta fall asleep."

He sat down next to me, took his hat off, and wiped the sweat off of his forehead. "What's a kid your age doin' in da park all alone?"

I shrugged. "I was waitin' for a friend." I frowned as a feeling of anxiety crept up on me. "I better be gettin' home now."

He grunted a response as I ran towards the building I lived in. I gasped as I saw smoke and flames leaping from the windows and firemen rushing around. "Mommy!" I yelled as I started running closer. A nearby fireman saw me and grabbed my arm. I tried to jerk away and the tears started streaming down my cheeks. "Let me go! I gotta find my mommy!"

"Sorry kid, can't let you go any closer." He said and he pushed me back. I watched the building burning and looked through the crowd for my mom or even Christopher, but didn't see them anywhere.

After the fire was put out, my parents were never found, so I was sent to an orphanage. It was okay at first. I mean, there was a roof over my head, and I had food. At the time I was so upset about loosing my best and only true friend, not to mention my mother, to really care.

As I got older the lady that ran the orphanage got a boyfriend, Mr. O'Reilly. He came by quite a bit, seemed to be a pretty nice guy. He became the father I never knew before long. But then he got a little too close, and decided to teach me things no eight year old should have known. When I was younger, I was to scared to do or say anything about it. As I got older I tried to fight back, resulting only in more bruises.

By the time I was 12 he had been married to the lady for five years, but two months before I turned thirteen I found out I was pregnant. When they found out about it, they locked me in the basement until the baby was born, and then claimed it was hers. I watched my little boy grow up with someone else for two years, and cried myself to sleep most nights. In 1898 when I was fifteen I finally got tired of the beatings and being someone's whore and so I ran away.

One night after O'Reilly had passed out I got dressed, packed a few clothes, stole some money out of his pants, and ran out into the night, hoping someday I'd find my kid again. I didn't stop until I got to Manhattan. When I did slow down I realized my mistake immediatly as I heard menacing laughter coming from behind me. I turned to see two guys walking up to me. The taller one stepped forward and wrapped an arm around my waist. "Hey sweetface."

I pushed him away quickly and glared. "Don't touch me you creep."

He just laughed a little and the two of them dragged me into an alley kicking and screaming. Later on I walked out with twice as many bruises as before, and fell asleep on a park bench in Central Park.

The next day I woke up and started walking around. Around one or two in the afternoon my stomach growled but before I could steal any food, someone bumped into me and I heard a whistle. I turned to see who had ran into me and I saw a boy with a red bandanna around his neck and a cowboy hat on his head. I glared at him angrily. "Whatta ya think yer doin'?"

He shrugged a little, but before he could say anything a police officer ran up yelling for someone to stop "them". I frowned a little, realizing that now they was after me too. The boy grabbed my hand and led me down a few streets until we finally lost the officer. "Sorry 'bout dat." He said as we finally stopped, then offered a hand and smiled. "Da name's Jack Kelly. Friends call me Cowboy."

I glared at him, refusing to accept his hand. "Alex." I said coldly.

He stopped smiling and stared at the bruises on my face. "Ya got a place ta stay, Alex?"

I glared and backed up a little, immediatly suspicious. "I don't need yer help."

"I don't know where ya got dem bruises, an' I ain't gonna ask. But if ya need a place ta stay, ya can be a newsie an' stay at da Lodgin' House. Dere ain't no goils dere, but me boys won't try nothin' wit ya, I'll be sure of dat." He said solemnly.

I tried to hide my shaking hands and stared at him for a few seconds, deciding whether I wanted to sleep on the streets again or take my chances with a bunch of boys. I thought back to what had happened in the alley last night, and I realized that if I stayed on the streets I would be more likely to run into the other two boys that I knew I couldn't trust. "You better not be lyin' ta me."

"We'll be perfect gentlemen, promise." He said and stepped forward to put an arm around my shoulders to lead me out of the alley, but backed away when he saw the look of fear I was trying to hide. He motioned for me to walked out of the alley instead. "Just follow me."

I nodded and followed him to a restaraunt. "This isn't a lodging house." I said coldy.

He shrugged. "I thought you'd like ta meet some a da guys, an' get somethin' ta eat."

I walked in and looked around at the room full of boys. They greeted Jack and one or two gave me a curious glance. Finally, the one carrying a cane spoke up. "Hey Jack, who's da goil?"

He looked at the boy and smiled. "Hey Spot, dis is Alex. She's gonna be stayin' wit us."

The guys all circled around me to introduce themselves, but Jack seemed to sense my fear and glared at them. "Fella's! Give da goil some room ta breath, will ya?"

They backed off a little and I was introduced to them one by one. A boy with a crutch who they called Crutchy tapped Jack on the shoulder. "Hey, does she got a nickname yet?"

I frowned. "A nickname?"

Jack nodded. "Yeah, we all gots 'em. Dey come in handy when da bulls is lookin' for ya."

"Oh." I said quietly.

Spot walked up and put an arm around me. I jumped back like I had been burnt and he stared at me suspiciously. "Flicker."

I blinked. "What?"

He smiled a little and shrugged. "Yer eyes flicker."

I watched him like a hawk as he bid farewell to the other boys and walked out the door. Jack sent me a concerned look. "Don't let him scare ya, he ain't as dangerous as he looks."

I shivered a little. For a few seconds I felt like he was staring into my soul with those blue-grey eyes of his. "He didn't scare me." I lied.

Jack smiled a little and sat at a table. "Come on Flicker, let's get somethin' ta eat."

I nodded and sat across from him. After we ordered and ate lunch, we walked back to the Lodging House with two boys named Snoddy and Dutchy. When we walked in we were greeted by an old man standing behind a desk. "Hello boys, who's dis?" He said, warmly. He seemed to be very nice, but then my thoughts went back to Mr. O'Reilly, at the time I had thought he was a nice guy too. I stepped away from him a little as Jack smiled. "Hey Kloppman. Dis is Flicker, she don't got a place ta stay so I thought she could stay heya an' be a newsie. Is dat okay?"

The old man, Kloppman, nodded a little. "I don't see why it wouldn't be. There are girl newsies in other places."

I reached into my pocket to pay him for the night and handed him the money before darting upstairs after Jack, Snoddy, and Dutchy. I heard the guys talking to some others and when I walked in I saw three boys I hadn't met yet. Jack smiled at me and motioned to them. "Guys, dis is Flicker. Flicker, dat's Racetrack, Mush, an' Kid Blink." I glanced at them for a few seconds after muttering a greeting. I only looked at Racetrack and Mush for a few seconds, Kid Blink was the one I couldn't help but stare at. I couldn't shake the feeling that we had met before. I thought for a few seconds, staring at his blond hair and blue eyes... no, eye. I froze as I noticed the brown patch, just like a pirate would wear. My hand automatically flew to my neck where a little silver ring hung on a chain. I had out grown it years ago, but I always wore it around my neck. "Jamaica." I whispered under my breath.

He looked up at me. "Somethin' wrong?"

I shook my head as a chill ran up my spine. All these years I had thought he ws dead. "No, I was just... thinking." He shrugged and handed a deck of cards to Racetrack, who started dealing a game of poker.

"Ya know, we ain't neva' had a goil heya before. I mean, dey've had goil newsies in da Bronx an' Harlem, but we ain't neva' had one." Mush said as he looked through his cards.

I looked up. "Really?"

Jack nodded. "Yeah. But don't worry, dey'll be sorry if dey don't mind deir manners."

Blink laughed a little. "Aw come on Jack, we always do." He said in mock innocence.

I glared at him and found an empty bunk to lie down on. The next morning I walked with the circulation center with the others, being careful to keep my distance. That became my daily routine for the next two weeks. Get up in the morning, follow the guys to the circulation center, carry the banner, go back to the Lodging House and read a book or something. Eventually the guys stopped trying to talk to me when they realized I was avoiding them. Two weeks later I walked towards the gates with my papes and heard Racetrack say my name. Kid Blink laughed a little. "Flicker? Ya mean da Ice Princess?"

A few of the guys laughed but looked pretty uncomfortable when I walked up and glared at Blink. "If you're goin' ta say somethin' 'bout me, ya could at least have da guts ta say it ta my face."

He nodded solemnly. "Yer right. It won't happen again... yer highness."

A few of the guys stiffled laughs as I turned to look at Racetrack. "Mind if I play poker with you guys tonight?"

He shrugged. "Nah, go ahead."

Blink laughed. "I didn't know poker was a game prin-" He stopped and started staring at my chest. I shifted uncofortably and looked down, realizing he had seen the little silver ring he had given me.

He paled a little and looked up. "Alex? Is dat you?"

I froze for a second before I ran out of the gates with my papes. I stopped running after a while and started walking around. I cursed when I finally took the time to look around and saw I was standing in front of the orphanage. I automatically spotted a little boy, just over a year and a half old. I winced a little as I realized how much he looked like his father. He had the same black hair and the facial features were alike, but I smiled a little when I saw he had my smoky green eyes.

A few seconds later a dark haired man walked out of the orphanage. While I was trying to decide whether I should run and maybe draw his attention, or stand still and hope he wouldn't see me, his eyes met mine and he started walking my way. I hesitated for a fraction of a second, and then ran as fast as my legs could carry me towards Manhattan. Two or three blocks later I ran into someone who grabbed my arms. I kicked and hit him trying to get away but despite his small size, he was too strong. I burst into tears and made a few more weak attempts to get away as he put his arms around me. "Hey, it's all right. I ain't gonna hurt ya."

I looked up and had to take a second glance when I saw those intense blue-grey eyes. I knew who he was right away, but the last time I had seen him he practically radiated arrogance, and now he only looked concerned. "Spot?"

"Ya okay?" I tried to pull away again but he only held me tighter. "Hey, it's okay. I don't know everything that's happened ta ya, but me an' da guys won't let no one hurt ya."

I frowned. "Let me go."

He nodded a little and stepped back. "So what were ya runnin' from?"

I sniffed as I kicked some dirt and looked away. "Ah, nothin' important."

He frowned a little and looked behind me. "Dat guy at da orphanage, was he da one dat gave ya dose bruises ya showed up wit?"

My head snapped up. "What?"

He smiled a little. "Yeah, I saw him. I followed ya when I saw ya runnin' outta da circulation yard. Anyway, da look on yer face when dat guy saw ya was enough for me ta figure out who he was."

I glared. "He's da guy dat's married ta da lady dat runs da orphanage."

He nodded. "I ain't stupid. Jack brought ya inta Tibby's an' ya looked like ya'd been soaked pretty good, an' ya still won't get anywhere near da guys. I'se seen it happen before."

I glared at him. "Yeah, well if you don't keep your nose out of my business, it'll end up where your eyes is supposed ta be."

He glared back and grabbed my arm. "I don't like bein' threatened."

My eyes widened and I shivered a little. "What are ya goin' ta do ta me?"

He let me go and pointed to my papes. "Well first I'se gonna help ya sell dose, an' den I'm gonna take ya back ta Manhattan."

"I can take care of myself." I snapped.

He looked annoyed for a few seconds. "Just stop arguin' an' give me some a dose."

I reluctantly handed him some papes, and together we sold them by noon. After we got something to eat he told me to follow him. I frowned when he stopped in front of a warehouse. "Dis ain't Manhattan."

He turned around. "No, it ain't. I'm gonna teach ya ta fight."

I started to object but he wouldn't listen, and he spent the rest of the afternoon teaching me the basics of fighting. Around sunset he finally stopped. "Well, yer doin' okay for da first day, but it's time ta get ya back."

I nodded and walked back to Manhattan with him. When we walked in the bunkroom Blink jumped up. "Alex!"

I glared at him. "Alex? Whatever happened ta da Ice Princess?"

He looked hurt for a second. "Don't ya remember me? Jamaica an'-"

I rolled my eyes. "Of course I remember ya! I noticed dat patch a mile away."

He blinked. "Ya mean ya knew all along? But why didn't ya say anythin'?"

I shrugged. "What was I supposed ta say? 'Hey Chris! How ya doin'? So, yer not dead huh.. well dat's good. Cause all da time in dat crummy orphanage I always thought da reason I neva' saw ya again was cause ya died in dat fire an' heya ya are alive an-"

He glared at me. "Woah! Hold it! Don't get mad at me, I didn't know you were alive!"

I shrugged. "Yeah, well I am. Unfortunately." I said and started to turn away but he grabbed my shoulders. I glared at him and tried to get away. "Let me go!"

Spot leaned out the bunkroom door and then turned towards me struggling with Blink. "Flicker will ya stop dat! Flicker!... Blink, for cryin' out loud, let 'er go!" Blink stepped back and Spot motioned for me to come over to the door. When I got there I started to ask him what he wanted, but he motioned for me to be quiet and I heard a man's voice downstairs. "She has long red hair, about so tall, I think she had green eyes. She pushed my son out of the way of a carriage and I'd like to thank her. Is she staying here?" I bit my lip and looked at Spot who walked down the stairs. "Hey Kloppman, who's dis guy?"

"Mr. O'Reilly. He's looking for a red haired girl, says she helped his son and wants to thank her. Seen any girl newsies with red hair?"

I walked out of the bunkroom and snuck a look down the stairs just in time to see Spot shake his head. "Dere ain't no goils stayin' in Brooklyn, an' da guys woulda said somethin' if dere was one heya."

I leaned on one of the floorboards too much and it creaked loudly. I hid and held my breath, breathing a sigh of relief when the man thanked Kloppman and left. Spot walked up the stairs and stared at me seriously. "Ya oughta be more careful."

"I wanted ta see what was goin' on." I said softly as I stood up and walked into the bunkroom. Blink frowned. "What was dat all about?"

I shrugged. "Some guy from da orphanage is lookin' for me."

He nodded a little. "Den I'll sell papes wit ya tomorrow."

"I took care of myself just fine for da ten years I thought ya were dead, in fact I got used ta da idea, an' nothin's changed. I still don't need yer help." I said coldly and climbed out the window to sit on the fire escape.

A few minutes later the window opened and Jack sat beside me. "Hey Flicker. I was just wonderin' how ya know Blink."

I glared at him. "Long story."

He lit a cigarette. "I got all night."

I shrugged and started to tell him about living a few doors down from Blink and the fire that had separated us. He listened and nodded when I finished. "So what happened in da orphanage?"

I glared at him. "Hey, I don't go pryin' inta yer life, stay outta mine. I thought dat was one a da unspoken rules of da newsies."

He sighed. "Yeah, I guess it is. Well, I'll just have to make it even. My mudda' died when I was born, my pop was a no good drunk and got thrown in jail for assault an' resistin' arrest. Now dat ya know my story, what about yours?"

I clenched my teeth. "It ain't none a yer business."

He shrugged. "I didn't think ya'd tell me. I got my own theory."

"I don't wanna hear it." I snapped.

He nodded. "Didn't think ya would. But ya should give Blink a chance, he just don't want no one ta hurt ya. He don't know what happened in dat orphanage, so don't blaim it on him."

"Fine, I'll sell papes wit him tomorrow." I said coldly and climbed back into the bunkroom to get some sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day I was selling papes with Blink, just like I said I would. It started out going pretty good, but around noon Blink had his back turned and was selling a pape to some guy. While he wasn't looking someone put a hand over my mouth to stiffle my screams and dragged me into a carriage.

No one told me where the carriage was going, but it was all too simple. In the back of my mind I was hoping that maybe Blink had seen what had happened and would follow behind, but I kicked myself for believing something as foolish as our dreams of Jamaica had been. One thing I did know at that moment, was that I hated reality. I mean, if it wasn't for reality, life would be great! Reality was just some big stupid concept that should have never been invented.

I remember someone once told me something about people being actors and the world being one big stage. I probably got it mixed up a little, but it was just as stupid. All I knew was that if people were actors in the play of life, the hero in my story needed to be fired because the idiot kept missing his cue! I drew a shaky breath as the carriage finally came to an abrupt stop. I winced as Mr. O'Reilly grabbed my arm and dragged me into the orphanage, and down into the basement. He slapped me and I fell down. "Ungrateful little whore." I shivered and a few involuntary tears ran down my cheeks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

3rd Person

The guys all looked up as Blink ran into Tibby's with a concerned look on his face. "Hey Blink, somethin' wrong?" Jack asked after a few seconds."

"I was sellin' papes wit Flicker an' I was sellin' a pape ta dis guy, an' when I turned around she was gone."

Jack shrugged. "Look, don't worry bout it. She didn't want no one lookin' out for 'er anyway. If she ain't back by tonight we'll go look for 'er, but it's probably nothin'."

Blink nodded a little and waited for Flicker to show up. When they went back to the Lodging House at about nine o'clock and she wasn't there, they decided to go look for her. Spot and Blink went to the orphanage she had passed by the day before. Spot motioned for Blink to stay quiet as the walked to the back and crawled through a window, then opened the door for Blink, who looked around a little. "I'll look down heya, you go up there." He said as he found the door to the basement.

Spot nodded and started walking away but before he could get out of the room Blink saw a flash of red at the bottom of the stairs and called him back. When they walked down the stairs they saw Flicker laying in blood and broken glass. She had been soaked and her clothes were torn into tatters. Blink kneeled beside her and noticed her wrists were slit, probably with one of the pieces of glass. He took off his shirt and ripped some strips off that he wrapped as tightly as he could around her wrists.

Spot and Blink carried her upstairs and then to the Lodging House as fast as they could. When they got her there Kloppman called a doctor to fix her up and Blink watched her all night and the next day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flicker's POV

My eyes fluttered open and I was surprised, and a little happy, to find that I was in a bed in the Lodging House instead of in a cold basement, although I was disappointed even to be there, I hadn't slit my wrists for no reason. I saw Blink out of the corner of my eye yawning. He smiled when he saw me giving him a skeptical look. "Ya feelin' okay?"

I glared at him. "What do you think?"

He looked away. "Why'd ya do it?"

"Do what?" I asked, wondering what I had done.

He looked at my hands. "Try ta kill yerself."

I turned away as tears started building up in my eyes. "When I was a kid, my fadder beat me, when I got rid of him, dat creep beat me an' he raped me. Den last night it was just like old times, only when he was through wit me I could hear him upstairs wit some odder goil. I knew dat she was goin' through da same thing I had ta go through just a few weeks ago, but I didn't feel sorry for her, I was just glad it was her an' not me. I knew no one would come get me, an' I couldn't take knowin' dat da next night he'd have his doity hands all ova' me again. So when I saw dat glass da only thing I could think of was endin' it all."

He looked upset for a second, well, about as upset as he could look. His mouth always turned up at the corners a little, even when he frowned. "We did come lookin' for ya."

I shrugged nonchalantly. "Well it ain't neva' happened before."

He set his lips in a determined line. "From now on ya don't 'ave ta worry bout dat, cause I'll always help ya when ya're in trouble."

"Maybe I didn't want to be rescued, ya eva' think of that?" I said bittery.

His forehead creased in confusion. "What do you mean?"

I glared at him and started quoting something I had once heard. "You do me wrong to take me out of the grave Thou art a soul in bliss But I am bound upon a wheel of fire That mine own tears do scold like molten lead." (From King Lear, by Shakespeare)

He clenched his teeth and for the first time he seemed angry. "Look, I know what's happened to ya, but ya ain't da only one ta get a rotten deal in life. Ya don't 'ave any clue what kind a' life any of da guys've lived or what mine's been like, so don't tell me my life's all great, cuz it ain't." He said with a cold note in his voice and walked out of the room.

I blinked back tears, but couldn't keep a few from rolling down my face. "He's right you know." I heard a voice say from the shadows. I jumped as I saw Spot Conlon walk out from behind the door.

"What're ya doin' heya and what would you know anyway?" I snapped.

He smirked mockingly. "I came heya ta see if ya was doin' okay an' I know a heck of a lot more den you know sweetheart."

I glared at him. "Don't call me that... and you don't know as much as ya think ya do."

He put his hat on and smirked. "I know dat yer a selfish witch fer treatin' Blink like dat when he's just tryin' ta help cause he cares 'bout ya. He'll be da last ta see what kinda person ya are, but he'll figure it out eventually, an' one day ya'll need 'im an' he won't be dere. Den ya'll be sorry." He said coldly before he walked out the door.

I let out a strangled sob as he slammed the door behind him. A few minutes later the door opened again. "Alex?" Blink said, concern in his voice. "Ya okay?"

I wiped away my tears and glared at him, Spot was wrong, I would never need Blink, never. "Go away, I don't need you."

He looked hurt. "I'll be here if you ever do. I'll always be here Alex."

I looked down away as he walked out the door. 'He had said he'd always be there, Spot said he wouldn't.... but it doesn't really matter, I'll never need him. I'm fine on my own, just fine... who needs friends and family and laughter and love... not me, I'm fine.' I thought, trying to convince myself I had done the right thing. I looked up at the door again. 'I don't need Blink, or the others, I'm fine on my own... but still, it would be nice to have a friend...' I shook my head, trying to forget the thought and fall asleep into a peaceful, if not eternal, oblivion.

The End... well, sort of

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