Disclaimer: If you haven’t figured it out by now, I don’t own Newsies. Disney owns Newsies. I just own the plots. Or lack thereof.

Barbershop 3

Davey pulled a brush through his friend’s hair, marveling at how pretty and shiny it was now that David had washed it for him.

“Oh, Jack, your hair is so prettyful!”

“It’s CLEAN!!!” The Manhattan cowboy whined.

“Yeah, and look how good it looks now! I don’t know anyone who had better hair than this.”

Jack grumbled, but Davey just sighed happily and continued to fill his hair with pink and purple ribbons and braids and such. Jack shivered and whimpered at the loss of his great deal of greasiness, that rivaled Danny Zucco’s, and Jack’s had been NATURAL!!! He’d never be able to do anything with it now. Especially not with Davey pulling out…

…THE SCISSORS?!!?!

Jack screamed and ran, terrified, for Brooklyn. David ran after him, yelling at him to come back so he could ‘trim a few split ends’. Kelly dashed, panting, right onto Spot’s docks. Conlon, looking irritated at the intrusion, jumped down in front of Jack, blocking his path and eyeing his new hairdo suspiciously. “Just what’d’ya think yoah doin’, Jacky-boy?!”

“Spot!! You gotta- “ That’s when Jack noticed Spot’s hair. Long and blonde and shiny. Nice and straight, and it looked really soft. Jack wanted to pet it. Maybe it was a bit too long. Cowboy had a different idea. “…come wid me, Spot.” He finished, grinning widely.

Jack led a suspicious, but curious (and therefore willing) spot back over to where Davey had been stopped by the Brooklyn henchmen. “Heah, Dave. Spotty wants a haircut. An’ shampoo’s stuff, jus’ like mine.”

“What the fuck?! Says who?! You puttin’ woids in my mouf, Jacky-boy?!”

But it was too late. Dave had already grabbed Spot and he was dragged off, kicking and screaming curses, down the street towards David’s family’s apartment, and rushed into the bathroom so quickly that the door was slammed in Jack’s face, and he was left outside to wonder what all the cursing and whining and yelling from Spot was resulting from. Half an hour later, he found out.

Davey emerged proudly, still brandishing scissors. Spot had to literally be dragged from the room, though. And for good reason. His hair had been washed, cut, layered, face-framed, and otherwise mutilated… and looked entirely not Spot. Okay, it looked extremely girlish. Jack started laughing so hard he could barely stand. He couldn’t help himself.

“AHHHHHH!” Spot yelled at him (or something like it, it may have just been really badly slurred by his Brooklyn-talk), and grabbed the scissors from David, proceeding to tackle the two Manhattan boys and chop off random patches of their hair. So they had become, quite literally, Spottily bald. And then he locked himself in the bathroom to alter his horrendous haircut while Jack and Davey stared numbly at the hair all over the floor.

And Skittery laughed, because he still had every single piece of his wonderfully messy hair. They hadn’t noticed him hiding behind the curtains.