Okay, I was reading these Jedi/Redneck jokes and I came up with this brilliant idea to write my own Newsies/Redneck jokes. So, here they are:
((P.S. I am from Arkansas so I am not putting down any hics--I am one))

You might be a redneck Newsie if........

By: Patch

1) You've ever said "Ya'll rise and shine! Carry that banner now ya hear?'

2) You're related to half the "poor orphans and runaways"!

3) You're Newsie name has Bubba or Billy-Bob in it. (for example..Kid Billy-Bob or Racen' Sue Ellen Bob or Bubba Jack)

4) Ya still refer to Spot as "da city slicker who carrys a big walkin' stick!"

5) You use the excuse.."I was starvin' so I stole a R.C. and a moon pie!"

6) Ya think the Newsies Lodging house is Heaven compared to where you use to live!"

7) Ya have a Confederate flag pinned to your newsie hat.

8) You refer to Meddas' as the Saloon!

9) Under your bed at the Lodge you are hidin' 5-15 dogs.

10) At Tibbys you always order beans n cornbread or fried taters!

11)Your lines in KONY are "My very own coon gun with 20 shells!"

12)You couldn't possibly understand why on earth Spot would want a tub---Bathe---What is that?

13) You thought that Medda's "Hello Newsies--what's new?" was funny and clever!

14) Ya refer to scabs as yella-livered sissys or no good yankees! (Sorry, but its only fair to pick on the North too) (Echo: Well I quite agree, yankees are sissies... well, with the exception of our fine newsie friends...)

15) Every night in the Lodge you yell "Good Night John-Boy" or" Good Night Mary Ellen!"

16) You wardrobe consist of over-alls and long johns!

17) You understand the line "I'm one high fallutin (Spelled wrong I know) son of a gun!" in KONY!

Okay guys that's all I have for now. If you have anymore send them to me and you can forward this to anyone and put it in your home pages if you want. That would be pretty cool! --Patch

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