Mario Cuomo "I watched a small
man with thick calluses on both hands work fifteen and
sixteen hours a day. I saw him once literally bleed from
the bottoms of his feet, a man who came here uneducated,
alone, unable to speak the language, who taught me all I
needed to know about faith and hard work by the simple
eloquence of his example."
Ruth
E. Renkel
"Sometimes the poorest man leaves his children the
richest inheritance."
Mark
Twain
"When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so
ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.
But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how
much the old man had learned in seven years."
Charles
Wadsworth
"By the time a man realizes that maybe his father
was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's
wrong."
Milton
Berle
"Father's Day is a holiday on which the family takes
time out to remember the forgotten man!
Bill
Cosby
"Fatherhood is pretending the present you love the
most is
soap-on-a-rope."
C. D. Williams "You don't need to
be right all the time. Your child wants a man for a
father not a formula. He wants real parents, real people
capable
of making mistakes without moping about it."
Rabbi
Kassel Abelson "The Hebrew word for parents is
horim, and it comes from the same root
as moreh, teacher. "The parent is, and remains, the
first and most
important teacher that the child will ever have."
Mae
Maloo
"Children seldom misquote you. They more often
repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said."
Henry
Ward Beecher "The most important thing a father
can do for his children is to love their mother."
-
Father's Day is a holiday when your son lets you wear
your new necktie
first.
Last
year on Father's Day, my son gave me something I've
always wanted:
the keys to my car!!!
Father's Day always worries me. I'm afraid I'll get
something I can't
afford.
Do you know what I got for Father's Day? The bills for
Mother's Day!!!
I'm getting my father something he never had before -- a
Job!!!
Father's Day is the day when father goes broke giving his
family money
so they can surprise him with gifts he doesn't need.
My dad used to play games with me. He used to throw me in
the air --
and walk away.
Father's Day gift: Something between the covers?
From the dead to the delightful, books have it all
By T.D. MOBLEY-MARTINEZ
Knight
Ridder Newspapers
 A tie - not another tie.
That's what your dad's thinking as he peels back the
wrapping paper on that unmistakable skinny-flat box this
Father's Day.
Not another tie.
But because he's your dad, what he says is: "Oh my!
Why, that's terrific! I've been needing another
tie."
And depending on your age (or his), he ruffles your hair
to punctuate the sentiment.
It doesn't have to be this way.
Cosmic truth No 1: All dads love books.
Cosmic truth No 2: The trick is finding the ones that
kick-start his square-peg-in-a-square-hole mind (or was
that a round hole?).
Here's a sampling of new books that will free your dad
from lying. Again.
"Enter the Matrix Official Strategy Guide"
(Bradygames, 192 pages, $14.99): Mall rats aren't the
only ones plugged into one of the coolest movies - and
now games - to light up the big screen. This book appeals
to his sense of order and his yearning for dominion:
Chapters break down the way to navigate this world where
machines use an illusion of life to lull humans into
becoming batteries.
"Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers" by
Mary Roach (W.W. Norton & Co., 224 pages, $23.95):
Roach's offbeat approach to death is evident from the
beginning: "The way I see it, being dead is not
terribly far off from being on a cruise ship. Most of
your time is spent lying on your back." Roach traces
the use of the cadaver - from medical experimentation to
the rate of decay - and describes odd, behind-the-scenes
moments perfect to halt all discussion at dinner. For
instance, a plastic surgery seminar where a surgeon
practiced face-lifts on decapitated heads.
"Jarhead: A Marine's Chronicle of the Gulf War and
Other Battles" by Anthony Swofford (Scribner, 272
pages, $24): Another war memoir? Hardly. Swofford writes
candidly about a television war - Desert Storm - that was
very real to Swofford, a sniper, and the men who served
with him. In it, he recounts a life spent waiting. For
terror. For heroism. For it all to be over.
"When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us: Letting Go of
Their Problems, Loving Them Anyway and Getting On With
Our Lives" by Jane Adams, (The Free Press, 206
pages, $23): Adams, a social psychologist, explores the
pain of a generation "who did it all right" and
yet produced children who fail to thrive. But really,
does the value of this book need explanation?
"The Wandering Hill" by Larry McMurtry (Simon
& Shuster, 320 pages, $26): It isn't "Lonesome
Dove," but, for some dads, just having a new Larry
McMurtry to pore through is enough. The second in
McMurtry's Berrybender series, "The Wandering
Hill" takes the reader through the rough-and-tumble
life of 1830s America. You know, walking 12 miles through
the snow to get to school, never having new shoes,
playing with sticks of wood as toys - all the stuff Dad
says about his own childhood.
"A Short History of Nearly Everything" by Bill
Bryson (Broadway Books, 560 pages, $27.50): Dad already
says he knows everything, but now he really can. Bryson,
a noted travel writer and humorist, takes the reader from
day one to the present like a stone skipping on the
water. To make sense of it all, Bryson sidles up to the
biggest brains alive - archaeologists, anthropologists
and mathematicians - and tries to make sense of their
theories on how we became who we are.
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