Recently during the Canadian election of 2004 I decided that since I was 18 and eligible to vote I would go to the elections home page so that I could read about the different parties and be better informed in this regards, so that I would be able to make a conscience decision when my time to vote came. I read the pages for two of the parties, and then I just got pissed off at having to read them. Mainly because these were two of the most stupid things I've ever had to read. just to give you an idea of what I had to endure, I've decided to write about what I read.
To start off with, the first party that I read about was known as "the marijuana party". the reason I read this was because I remember hearing of them back in grade 9 and I just wanted to know if it was as stupid as it sounded. How right I was. This party is dedicated to trying to legalize marijuana and make it available to everyone. Isn't that wonderful? Would you say that this is a good party to lead our country? This whole thing is just a large pile of bullshit. No one gives a fuck about legalizing pot and certainly there's no way you're ever going to get enough votes for it to matter. Any registered voter that actually supports this party are probably going to be too stoned to remember when the voting day is and forget to place their vote. The funniest thing about this party is that in the section marked "news" it states that the leader of the party was arrested for possession. And directly after that there's another article that states that the leader was going to give his parties platform from his prison cell. The thing I'm wondering is why the fuck the first article of news isn't the one that states he was arrested for possession. Because this is a guy who's trying to legalize this stuff, don't you think that people would clue in that he might have it on him the moment this dipshit stepped into the scene in the first place? Fucking morons. I seriously think that if the leader of the marijuana party ever became our prime minister we'd be majorly fucked. I can imagine how he spends our tax money. Gives his friends all the important government jobs, they're too fucked to know what's going on anyways, and then he tells them to raise taxes because he's got the munchies and needs money for chips. Also, there's no way anything of any importance is going to be done to begin with. Our tax money is not going to go towards what we really need, because anyone knows that when you're stoned you don't give a fuck about anything else except how hungry you are and whether spongebob squarepants is on. You'll never see people smoking it up and saying "you know, our hospitals are underfunded" or "Schools need more teachers." I say that anyone who votes for them because they believe in what they're standing for seriously should be shot repeatedly in the face. Their attitude towards marijuana is "A crime is only a crime if it's hurting someone else". That is bullshit. If that is the case then why don't they have a political party devoted to trying to legalize indecent exposure. They could call it the "Naturist party". Fuck it. What's next? Changing our flag?
The other party that I read about was known as the "Communist party of Canada". I had no fucking idea what it was about either other than the fact that it sounded retarded, so I decided to check it out, only to realize it was nothing more than a party run by some PMSing feminist who's working towards "equality advances of women". In other words, another reason for me to be pissed off. These are just many of the things that they're fighting for:
The Vote: Ok, I'm all for women having to vote, but the fact that they weren't allowed to over 80 years ago is too far in the past to keep bitching about. They can vote now, just shut the fuck up about your women's sufferage bullshit because I'm tired about hearing a history lesson about how women used to not be able to decide the direction that our country was headed.
Reproductive Choice: I don't understand what the fuck they mean by "reproductive choice". Do they mean the choice to have abortions or the choice to have children when they want to? I don't know about anyone else but I haven't seen a news report about a woman who was forced by her husband to have his children.
Some Legal Protections against Violence: i feel so sorry for you in this regards. Sarcasm? Damn right. Women have just as much Legal protection against violence as men do. It's pretty much just a matter of picking up the phone and dialing 911. Or calling your lawyer or some shit. It's not like men have more protection than women against violence. And it's not like women face more violence than women do. Shut the fuck up.
Some Legal Protections against homophobia: Here's the thing that pisses me off. I have never heard of a case of Lesbians getting beaten up because of their sexual preferences, only if they're by other females, then in that case it's plenty equal to me. Most males are usually fascinated by female homosexuality so much that nowadays it's very tolerated. If you ask me, there needs to be more legal protection against homophobia against gay males, because guys have a tendency to beat the fuck out of those guys, even when they're just minding their own business. Fuck they're retarded.
Some Legal Protections against Racism: Last I checked, women aren't a race.
social programs to provide a measure of equality: That's it. I can't take this shit anymore.
Another thing that pisses me off is the fact that while other parties state their pleas and include the problems of both males and females, this party overstates female problems without stating any problems that males face and this makes it seem like women have been reduced to nothing more than slaves. The party states that women's organizations have been shut down or under funded without even showing any specifics, and don't seem to give a fuck if male organizations are underfunded either. Also It seems that they belive rape only happens to females. They say "Violence against women remains widespread, yet funding is being eliminated for women's shelters and rape crisis centres." They fail to realize that the door swings both ways and men are just as likely to get raped as women are. The only problem is that women are looked upon as the weaker sex and believe that women can't rape men. Also their statement "The very concept of feminism is ridiculed by right-wing forces, and the self-confidence and achievements of many young women are twisted by the mass media to spread the lie that 'male inequality' is the 'new reality.'" is complete bullshit. Yeah, I'm sure that the fact that men pay more for auto insurance than women is all because of women's self-confidence and achievements. And don't feed me that bullshit about statistics stating that men get into more accidents than women. Both sides are just as likely to get into an accident as the other. If we're going to talk about statistics here then why don't you go find some statistics about how men get raped as well as females. If this is the case where the fuck are the goddamn rape crisis shelters for men? Shit I can't take this anymore. I'm all up for equality, but it has to be 50/50 for both sides.
After reading through all this I realized that I don't give a fuck about Canadian Politics. It's all just a pile of bullshit. Every party's platform boils down to these things: Lower taxes, Raise Health care, Raise school funding, etc. And of course all of these are bullshit. I think it's retarded that people buy into this. There's no way that they can lower taxes while at the same time raising everything else. People need to realize that the only ways they can get money to give everyone health care and better school systems and that shit is if they either raise taxes or borrow from other countries, and then people would bitch about that because of our national debt. The worst part about it though is that I have to vote because if I don't vote then I'll have dozens of annoying loud mouthed dipshits all on my ass saying "you don't care about the direction out country is headed" and blah blah blah shut the fuck up. Also because If I don't vote then I can't bitch and complain that the government isn't doing a good job, because accoring to dipshit know-it-alls my vote could've made a difference. So I have a brilliant plan to get around all this. What you do is when it comes time to vote, vote for the party you know is not going to win. This way, when the government totally fucks up and everyone's bitching about it, you can say "Don't look at me. I didn't vote for them. The other party could've done a better job." It's foolproof.