Driving Interstate 81 through Pennsylvania is boring. 200+ miles of boring.
There are some truly beautiful parts this way. Slowly rising mountains. Green
valleys. Surging rivers.
But you can only take so much.
The mind wanders. Some town and street names remind you of things. There is an occasional conscious effort to stay awake.
This is my travelogue. This is what I know about I-81. What I don't know I make up.
Many thanks to PAHighways for helping me assemble the exits.
Exit number is followed by the Exit Name.
197 Waverly
A real "girl movie" that I enjoy is "The Joy Luck Club." The struggles of mothers who left China and their American born daughters. One of the daughters is named Waverly. She was a child chess prodigy but lost her nerve after her mother's seemingly insensitive words. The two have a very difficult time connecting until near the end of their story when Waverly breaks down and cries out that her mother never really saw her for who she was. The mother responds with very simple and movingly delivered lines "I see you. I see you. I see you."
186 Drinker Street/Dunmore
Sounds like a Carmac punch line.
185 Steamtown National Historic Site
From the park's site:
Experience a part of American railroading that hasn't existed for nearly a century-the era of the steam locomotive! Steamtown National Historic Site was established on October 30, 1986, to further public understanding and appreciation of the role steam railroading played in the development of the United States. It is the only place in the National Park System where the story of steam railroading, and the people who made it possible, is told.
180 Moosic
We sang a song in elementary school that went:
Put another nickel in
In the nickelodeon
All I want is having you
And music! music! music!
But it sounded like moosic, moosic, moosic.
178B Avoca
That's not a word. Or a name, really. Reminds me of avacado. Also, there is a small town in Virginia (off route 50) called Atoka.
170B-165 Wilkes-Barre
I'm never really sure how to pronounce Barre. It seems either way is correct but "barry" is preferred by the dictionary. Seems that it is more complicated than at first glance, from Linguistic Geography of Pennsylvania: "Northern dialect, with a complicated linguistic history. Upstate New York-type in origin, with later mixture of Eastern Pennsylvania (German) features, and more recently Slavic superstrata due to immigration."
164 Nanticoke
Unflattering, funny town name. So is Assawoman.
159 Nuangola
I believe this is pronounced "new Angola." The traffic is usually bad in these parts.
155 Dorrance
"All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy." is what Jack Torrance typed over and over in The Shining.
145 West Hazleton
The halfway point between home and Syracuse. Kim always tries to get this far before stopping but we never do.
138 McAdoo/Tamaqua
I used to watch Wonderama on DC's Metromedia 5 (now Fox) as a child. Bob McCallister was the host. It was a variety show for kids. There was a game they played in which a child contestant was asked to pair six kids with six parents. There was only one clue as to familial relationship. The theory being that related people jump alike, the contestant was permitted to watch the others jump in place.
Anyway, the theme song for Wonderama contained the catchy phrase "kids are people, too/wackadoo wackadoo wackadoo."
134 Delano
Finally, a town named after Franklin Roosevelt's middle name.
131A Hometown
There are warning signs posted before this exit that are perhaps best summarized in song.
To John Mellancamp's "Small Town:"
No re-entry from Hometown
No food in Hometown
No lodging in Hometown
But that's all right with me
124B Frackville
Sounds like an cursed Amish town. We often stop here at the Cracker Barrel. Not our favorite but I know I can get something vegetarian here beside a salad (hold the chicken) or a grilled cheese.
124A Saint Clair/Schuylkill Mall/Pioneer Coal Mine Tunnel/Anthracite Coal Museum
Schuylkill is another place I cannot pronounce. I just looked it up and it's: SKOO-KL. Of course it's probably said another way locally. I guess when we the boys get older we should be prepared for, "Mom, can we go to the Anthracite Coal Museum?" and "I wanna go through the Pioneer Coal Mine Tunnel, please."
116 Minersville
There are also towns in Virginia and Maryland named after occupations like Mechanicsville. Why aren't towns named after desirable occupations, too?
104 Ravine
There is actually no ravine along the highway here. Several miles down, though, the road is suspended high in the air through the mountains. There are some hills and turns that appear like the road will stop and you will end up in a ravine.
90 Lebanon
Many, many towns in New York are named after other places. Other states do this too, but not nearly as much as NY: Mexico, Lisbon, Amsterdam, Paris, Philadelphia, Syracuse, Antwerp, Limerick, Denmark, Copenhagen, Bombay.
85B Fort Indiantown Gap
Seems like they could not stop naming this town. Three good town names could be derived from dividing up the moniker for this one.
80 Grantville/Hershey
I spent a weekend in Hershey when I was in high school. I remember the whole town smelling like chocolate. The streetlamps downtown are shaped like Hershey Kisses.
72 Paxonia/Linglestown
These two town names do not go together. Paxtonia is part of the Roman Empire. Linglestown is where Homer's friend Barney was born.
65B Marysville
From probably my favorite Tom Waits song, Burma Shave:
Hell Marysville ain't nothing but a wide spot in the road
Some night my heart pounds just like thunder
I don't know why it don't explode
Cause everyone in this stinking town has got one foot in the grave
65A Enola
OMD's Enola Gay:
Enola Gay, you should have stayed at home yesterday
Aha words can't describe the feeling and the way you lied
16 Gettysburg/Chambersburg
At certain points everything sounds like a Civil War battlefield site. These two I'm sure about. The battle of Dillsburg I'm not. We stopped in a diner in Gettysburg once. Seemed like a real nice town.
10 Marion
Harold Hill, The Music Man, proclaims:
Madam Librarian
What can I do, my dear, to catch your ear
I love you madly, madly Madam Librarian...Marian
Heaven help us if the library caught on fire
And the Volunteer Hose Brigademen
Had to whisper the news to Marian...Madam Librarian!
