Close to You
by
Hikaru
**
Part 5
**
Jiro broke away from Sugizo, trying to push the older man away, his efforts all in vain. Sugizo held onto him so tightly it was impossible to let go.
“ I can’t do this… I need to go home before things get complicated.” Jiro mumbled, still trying to push himself away.
“ I won’t let you go home.”
“ You’re Teru’s brother!” Jiro exclaimed, frustrated. “ I had slept with your brother and now I’ve just finished kissing you… I don’t think I can handle anymore of this!”
“ Anymore of what?” Sugizo’s voice much more gentle then before. “ What can’t you handle? Me? I’m not Teru… even though I’m related to him.. I’m not him.”
“ Yes but you’re his *brother*…,” Jiro tried to emphasize his point, “ And I’ve only met you a few hours ago.. this is turning too much like how I got caught in that night with Teru! I don’t want to repeat that!”
“ You won’t be repeating anything..,” Sugizo said softly. “ Like I said, I’m not Teru.”
“ But this situation is turning out just like how it did with him.” Jiro looked up pleadingly at him. “ Let me go home. This isn’t right. I can’t go about making out with people just as I’ve finished a non-existent relationship!”
Sugizo laughed, throwing his head back, much to Jiro’s surprise.
“ What’s so funny?” Jiro asked, pouting slightly.
“ You.” Sugizo shook his head. “ Ne Jiro…, I’m not asking you to make out with me. I’m not asking for anything except just one chance with you.”
“ No.”
“ Why not?”
“ Because you’re Teru’s brother!”
“ So?”
“ I’ll be meeting Teru if I go out with you… and it’ll be awkward! Besides… you’ve only met me!” Jiro was getting exasperated trying to make the other man see his point. “ You don’t know anything about me except that I asked a lady to let you in line first and that I went to Bali with your brother…”
“ Most relationships start without knowing much about each other..,” Sugizo said, thinking, “ I mean, that’s what relationships are for anyways, right? To get to know each other.”
Jiro shook his head, not giving up.
“ No. Not with you. I’m lucky my brother doesn’t know I’ve been with Teru, if he finds out I’m dating another man he’ll absolutely kill me.”
“ No he won’t.”
“ Sugizo-san just let me go home!” Jiro shouted, tired.
The pink haired man pulled Jiro towards him again, this time kissing him more fiercely. Jiro’s hand reached up to push Sugizo’s face away, he looked at the other man, shocked.
“ What is it that you want anyways?” Jiro asked, his lips quivering. “ I’m not about to sleep with you or anyone else… I’ve had enough of that.”
“ I want you, Jiro.” Sugizo said, his eyes looking serious. “ If I had known my brother left someone as wonderful as you I would’ve had him shot. I might’ve known you for just a couple of hours but I know what I see. And I’ve never met someone like you before. I want to get to know you.”
“ You can’t…” Jiro shook his head, still persistent.
“ Why not? I don’t care what my brother thinks.. if he doesn’t want you, all the better for me! I do!” Sugizo said earnestly.
Jiro winced at his words.
‘ ..he doesn’t want you…’
“ I admit, this is going a bit too fast for me.. but I still want you.” Sugizo took Jiro in his arms, feeling the smaller man tremble against him. “ Don’t be scared.. I won’t hurt you.”
“ How can you be so sure..?” Jiro said, still not believing.
‘ ..he doesn’t want you…’
“ How can you be so sure you won’t end up like Teru?” Jiro bit his lip, tears wouldn’t be good now. He had promised himself never to cry again.
Sugizo’s hold tightened.
“ Because unlike that little imbicile, I actually know what I want. And that’s you.”
Jiro let out a long, shuddered breath of air. He let himself slide into Sugizo’s warm embrace, feeling the strong arms hold him securely. Everything was surreal. The bar’s surrounding was just a figment of his imagination. The empty glasses were just visions. The warmness he felt was only an illusion. Nothing could ever feel so good. So right. To have someone fall for someone so quickly, that couldn’t be possible.
But he had fallen for Teru at first sight. He had experienced that feeling. Could it really be, someone else knew how he felt?
Jiro turned slightly to look up at Sugizo. He was welcomed by the soft touch of lips, so gentle and caring. Maybe there really was some truth in what this man was saying…
Should he give them a chance?
~~
Teru awoke to find himself facing the sleeping Ami. He noticed that his hand was still clutching some of her long strands of hair and that they were lying nude beneath the thin layer of cloth spread over them like a blanket. He let go of her hair, shifting into a more comfortable position. As soon as he moved, Ami stirred, blinking a few times before looking up at him.
She smiled.
“ Ohayou there.”
Teru gulped. A sense of déjà vu came over him.
“ Ohayou.”
She bit her lip at his expression. Clutching the sheets, Ami got up from her bed, wrapping herself in a bathrobe.
“ I need to go to work.” She explained, nodding towards the bathroom. “ You just make yourself at home while I shower.”
Teru nodded.
Ami walked into the bathroom, closing the door softly. She leaned against the white wood, breathing slowly. Raising her hands to her face, she shook her head, not believing what had happened between herself and Teru. Looking at her reflection in the mirror, she saw a stranger looking back at her.
“ He’s regretting it.” She spoke aloud to herself. “ He never wanted you.”
When the words she spoke finally registered itself in her mind, tears gathered in her eyes as she broke down and cried.
~~
“ So…. You were with Teru last night.”
Yumi looked up as her friend entered the store they both worked at. Ami gave her a weak smile and wore the work apron quickly, noticing that her boss was giving her the evil eye. She slid next to Yumi behind the counter and stayed quiet.
“ What happened?” Yumi asked, wrapping her arms around Ami’s slim waist. “ You’re tired from all of last night’s ‘work’?”
The blond chuckled but stopped when realizing that Ami was still quiet.
“ What’s wrong?” She was truly worried now. “ You’re supposed to be happy… you were with Teru last night… I thought you’ve always wanted to be with him..”
“ I did..,” Ami whispered.
“ Then what’s the problem?”
“ I don’t think he wanted to be with me..” Ami said, her voice choked. “ I remember him saying someone’s name last night.. but I forgot about that when he kissed me. When I woke up this morning and I saw him looking at me like.. like *that*.. I remembered.”
Yumi hugged her friend again,
“ Ami…”
“ Do you remember him saying anything about someone named Jiro?” Ami asked, her voice shaking.
“ No.” Yumi shook her head. “ Ami, I think you’re all worked up about nothing… he was drunk last night! I mean, he knew where he was going when he came back to you so he wanted to be with you. Jiro might just be his friend he spoke of when he was dead zonked.”
Ami shook her head, not wanting to hear her friend’s rationale.
“ No! He had this *look*… it was as if though he regretted what happened between us..”
“ Yeah, right…,” Yumi placed both hands on Ami’s face, making her stare straight into her eyes, “ You’re just worried over nothing. Really. What you saw was probably his morning face.. how he always looks like when he just wakes up… you’ve never really slept with him before this now, have you?”
“ No.. but..”
“ That’s it then! Don’t tell me you’re gonna break up with this guy you’ve been gushing over for months!” Yumi gave Ami a grin. “ Cheer up! You were able to be with the person you’d been dreaming of!”
Ami tried a smile.
“ I guess that’s true.”
“ And he didn’t brush you off or leave you alone, did he?”
“ No…”
“ So?”
Ami sighed, this time smiling more happily.
“ I guess I was just overreacting..”
“ That’s right!” Yumi said, laughing. “ Now… your turn to help me… I think Die-kun likes this person named Shinya….”
~~
“ Okaeri.”
Teru looked up and saw that his brother was waiting for him in the living room. There was an expression in his eyes that clearly said he wanted to speak with him. Teru shrugged and took the seat across his brother.
“ Tadaima.” Teru greeted him.
“ You were gone all night.” Sugizo said, his tone even.
“ I was with a girl.” Teru replied curtly. “ I haven’t been meeting Totchi, don’t worry.”
“ Good.” Sugizo had an approved look on his face. “ At least you’re doing something right for once.”
Teru thought about Sugizo’s words and remembered Ami. He wondered if what had happened was right. Having that one night with Jiro was enough, he didn’t want a relationship like that anymore. He hoped that Ami was different..
“ I’ve met Jiro.” Sugizo announced.
Teru literally fell off his chair. He took a moment to gather himself before looking at his brother in shock. He hadn’t expected that.
“ You.. y-you’ve met Jiro?” Teru asked, not able to hide the surprise from his voice.
“ Hai.”
“ Oh.” Teru looked away, not knowing what to say. “ How is he?”
“ He’s fine.” Sugizo folded his hands on his lap. “ You really blew it with him, you know? He’s actually a real decent guy.”
“ I know.” Boy, did he know.
“ You’re not with him anymore, are you?” Sugizo asked, his tone still lacking emotion. “ I mean, you’re with a girl and all..”
“ No, I’m not with him.” Teru thought about how to phrase his next words. “ I guess I sorta have a girlfriend.”
“ Good.” Sugizo stood up, looking at his brother as he did so. “ Because he’s mine now.”
Teru nearly had a heart attack. He looked at his brother, even more shocked than before. He placed a hand over his chest, trying to remember how to breathe.
“ He-he’s what?” Teru couldn’t be sure if he had heard right.
“ He’s mine.” Sugizo said, his voice clearly possessive. “ I like him, he’s mine. I don’t want you near him anymore because you’re obviously hurting him just by being alive.”
Teru also stood up, feeling mad.
“ What do you mean, he’s yours?”
“ Jiro’s agreed to try things out with me.” Sugizo shrugged. “ It took me the longest time to convince him that I wouldn’t mess up like you did but he agreed in the end.”
“ J-Jiro…,” Teru stuttered.
“ You don’t want him, I do. So stay away.” Sugizo narrowed his eyes. “ You’re the reason he’s so upset now and I want to keep him happy, something you’re incapable of doing.”
“ Now wait just a minute!” Teru couldn’t see straight. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing from his brother. “ You cannot go out with Jiro! He’s mine!”
“ Oh really?” Sugizo sneered. “ Since when? The day you left him alone in Bali? Last night when you were with another girl? Since when was he yours, dear brother?”
Teru bit his lip. He couldn’t answer that question.
“ Admit it. Jiro was never yours to begin with.” Sugizo turned around, walking towards his room. “ You could’ve had him, but you decided not to.. so he’s mine now.”
~~
Things were pretty quiet during breakfast between Hisashi and Jiro. Both didn’t know what to say to each other, they were too caught up in their own thoughts to really concentrate well.
“ You came home pretty late last night.” Hisashi observed.
“ You’re not okaa-san, ‘nii-san.” Jiro replied, biting into his sandwich.
“ But okaa-san’s not here, so I’ve got the responsibility to look out for you.” Hisashi’s fingers tapped themselves on the table. “ Were you with Teru?”
Jiro looked up, surprised.
“ You know about Teru?”
“ Haii. Shinya told me.” Hisashi said.
“ Oh.” Jiro didn’t know whether this was good or bad. His brother didn’t seem to be mad at him.
“ I wasn’t with Teru. We’re over.” Jiro said simply.
“ I hope you’re not lying to me.” Hisashi tried to make eye contact with Jiro but his younger brother wouldn’t look up.
“ I’m not.” Jiro replied.
‘ I’m just not telling you some things…,’ Jiro finished what he wanted to say in his mind. ‘ It’s too early to tell him about Sugizo-san..’
~~
It was already nearing noon; Shinya looked around him for a decent looking place he could stop to eat. He saw a small café situated next to a bookstore and smiled to himself, he hurried his steps towards the place, suddenly feeling more than a little hungry.
“ Shinya-san.”
However, it seemed as if though his thoughts for having lunch would be disrupted. Shinya sighed and turned to see who it was that had called him. He took a step back seeing the familiar profile of the tall model.
“ Toshiya.”
The other man didn’t look too easy around him but kept on a smile on his face anyways.
“ Could we talk?” Toshiya asked, uncertainly. “ It’s about Teru.”
Shinya rolled his eyes. Teru seemed to be the main focus of everyone at the moment. He nodded at Toshiya but wished that he didn’t really have to talk to the model; he really wasn’t his favorite person. Somehow there was this funny feeling he couldn’t quite shake off—that Toshiya had something to do with Teru leaving Jiro back in Bali.
“ I was just about to grab something to eat.” Shinya nodded towards the direction of the café. “ Care to join me?”
Toshiya turned towards where Shinya was gesturing at and instantly shook his head vigorously.
“ No!—I mean, I don’t think so.” He kept on shaking his head. “ I’ve eaten there before, it’s not all that great… I’ll bring you somewhere else.”
Shinya raised an eyebrow.
“ That café’s just fine. I don’t want to go anywhere far.”
“ But—“
“ Do you want to talk about Teru or not?” Shinya asked, getting annoyed by Toshiya.
The man chewed on his bottom lip, thinking about Shinya’s question for a quick second before nodding his head.
“ Then we’ll eat there.” Shinya announced. “ Let’s go.”
Shinya turned away from Toshiya, walking in the direction of the café, not really caring if the other followed him or not. Toshiya seemed to still be hesitating but ran after Shinya in the end, looking quite afraid, as if though someone might just jump out and attack him.
“ What’s wrong with you?” He demanded, noticing the frightened look on Toshiya’s face.
“ Nothing.” The blue head bowed his head, not wanting to look up.
“ Toshiya-kun!”
Shinya turned towards the person who had just appeared out of nowhere. A girl of about 12 ran out and practically threw herself upon Toshiya. He was almost expecting Toshiya to brush her away but instead there was a kind look on the model’s face he’d never seen there before; not even on the many pictures pasted on magazine covers.
“ Kiki-chan…,” Toshiya’s voice was gentle. “ Hisashiburiyo.”
“ Mm!” The girl nodded, her golden hair bouncing on her shoulders excitedly. “ I’ve seen you in all of your commercials… and I’ve read every magazine with you in it! You’re wonderful!”
There was an obviously pleased expression on Toshiya’s face.
“ Arigatou ne.”
“ Why haven’t you visited, Toshiya-kun?” The girl’s happy face was suddenly marred by a disappointed frown. “ You promised you’d come and visit me once you’re famous.”
“ I—“ The pleased look was replaced by one of guilt.
Deciding that he’d better save the situation, Shinya immediately went to Toshiya’s side, offering a smile at the girl.
“ He’s been busy, that’s all.” Shinya explained, “ You know.. he’s got to go through so many shows and photoshoots.. he’s hardly had time for himself!”
Toshiya looked extremely thankful at Shinya’s explanation; the man looked ready to just hug and kiss the man at his side.
“ Who are you?” The girl asked, looking up from Toshiya to Shinya. “ Are you his girlfriend or something?”
Shinya face-vaulted.
“ Anoo… no, I’m not. I’m just his friend.” Shinya felt a headache coming. “ I’m Terachi Shinya. What’s your name?”
“ Kirina Tomei desu.” The girl bowed. “ Or just ‘Kiki’ like Toshiya-kun always calls me.”
“ Ah… Kiki-chan it is.” Shinya smiled, the girl looked so sweet! “ How did you come to know Toshiya?”
Toshiya looked as if though he was about die, though this look went unnoticed by Shinya who was still facing Kiki.
“ He’s my half-brother, of course!” Kiki giggled as if though this was the most obvious thing in the world. “ Toshiya-kun used to work with my family so he became sorta like my brother!”
Shinya turned to look at Toshiya, who couldn’t meet his eye.
“ Um.., Kiki-chan, we’re gonna eat here so why don’t I help you with the cooking, ne?” Toshiya said, smiling like the older brother he was.
“ Haii!”
Kiki rushed off into the café again, even more gleeful than before. That left Shinya and Toshiya by themselves standing in such a still still silence, it was beginning to become oppressive.
“ You…?” Shinya’s voice trailed off at the unasked question.
“ I told you I didn’t want to come here.” Toshiya said, though there was no sign of anger in his voice, only the guilt that would’ve match his face perfectly earlier on.
With that, Toshiya stepped into the café, followed by Shinya, who didn’t know what to make of things anymore.
~~
Die took his jacket from his locker, humming a cheerful tune to himself.
“ What’re you so happy about, Die?” A fellow worker asked, looking curiously at Die who was starting to do a little dance.
“ Hm?” The red head looked up, as if though noticing for the first time that there were other people in the room. He grinned sheepishly. “ Nothing… I was just able to meet this really gorgeous person last night.”
“ As pretty as that Yumi girl you’re always with?” There was an appreciative grin on the guy’s face.
“ Nope.” Die shook his head, his smile turning into a broad grin. “ Prettier.”
This statement was answered by a room filled with whistles and catcalls. Die laughed them off, walking out of the locker room feeling even more happier than before.
“ Shinya… Shinya..,” Die smiled to himself, “ How do I adore thee?”
Die chuckled at his self-talking. He shook his head and walked off towards the bus stand.
‘ I’m gonna find him today.. if it’s the last thing I do.’
**
End of Part 5
to be continued~
back to deg fics pg 3