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Danette Blair

Danette's Thoughts on Gentle Mothering

1.) What does gentle mothering mean to me? Gentle mothering to me means spending time in play with my children, instilling in them the word of God, teaching them how to be part of a family by learning chores, and showing them how to respect themselves and others by example. Gentle mothering also means that I use natural and fair consequences when disciplining my children instead of using threats and spankings. Most of all it means loving my children no matter what.

2.) Why is gentile mothering important to me? My oldest son is now three and I used a very strict schedule with him as a baby and spankings when he became a toddler. Now that he is a preschooler I’ve found myself with a very angry child who knows how to really irritate and frustrate his mother. I also have a 1 ½ year old son and a newborn daughter, both who have been on a more natural schedule as babies. God has really convicted me on my disciplining style since it just makes for an angry parent and child. I’m starting with myself, learning self-control through the study of God’s word. It’s not easy to stay calm in the midst of defiant behavior and sibling rivalry for me, but with God’s help I can learn. I’m memorizing Col. 4:6 to help me through this, “Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you should respond to each person.”

3.) Why do you feel God wants you to parent this way? Through God’s word I have learned that the way I have dealt with my children in the past was sinful. In times of stress I disrespected them, raised my voice, had an angry countenance, was inattentive to their needs, and at times was harsh. I’ve been forgiven of these sins and still struggle with them daily, but I’m continuing in God’s word and know that the Lord will give me the gentleness He commands because I have asked for it in prayer.

Danette's Testimony

My parents are both Christians and began instilling the word of God in my life from the beginning. When I was eight I went to a Christian camp where I asked the Lord to come into my life. At the age of 16 I felt the pull of God in my heart to give myself completely to Him, to do whatever He asked willingly. I was sure he would send me to Africa to be a missionary and I was ready to go. But, I was married by age 19 to a wonderful guy who went to my church and I put those plans aside. Two years after being married, my husband stopped going to church, I realized then that I had married an unbeliever. The Lord had a much different plan for my life. Instead of winning the souls of those who lived in Africa the Lord had put me in a place to win just one soul, the soul of my husband. After nine years of marriage and three kids latter, he is still not a believer. So every day during my prayer time I ask that I will be the kind of wife and mother that will bring salvation to my family.