August 21, 2001
I'm having knee surgery at 10:30am today in a city 3.5 hours away. And here I am writing this entry at 1:20am the same day. Linkin Park entertains my eardrums, and a stuffed buffalo guards my monitor. S'kette is settled in nex to "Tank" the tatanka (buffalo), and probably wondering my I look like I'm screaming but there are no words coming out of my mouth. I don't really know the point behind this journal entry, but maybe an explaination is in order. Let me tell you the weird reason why I am up so late at night. . .
The nurses called my house this morning explaing that I couldn't eat anything after midnight the night before my surgery. But I'm a real morning person and I love to have breakfast. So my plan was eat as much a I could up until 10:30pm, then stay up as long as I could. I would leave the house at 7am with my mom and drive 3.5 hours. During that drive I would be sleeping, so I wouldn't worry about how hungry I was. I would finally eat after I have surgery. Seemed like a good idea in the beginning. ThenI also realized that I am a person who also likes her sleep. Now my plan has become a double-edged sword. I can escape the pains of hunger, but I can't experience the comfort of my bed. My bed will become a seat in a moving car along a fairly bumpy road. The roads are all bumpy in South Dakota.
"How many times have you stayed up this late, Kim? How many?" I answer too many. Too many times I have sat in front of this contraption and tried to put my inner thoughts to digital paper. Too many times I have painted in pixels and made magic with filters. Too many times I have chosen the computer over more important things in life. Like watching a movie out in the living room with the rest of my family, calling up a friend just to talk and maybe go out and do something, passing up some badly needed sleep. Why do I do this to myself. A computer can't hug you, walk on the shore of the river and enjoy an evening of fishing, it can't laugh, it can't cry, it can't make you feel wanted. So why am I sacrificing so many important things in life for this inanimate giant paperweight? Why?...
The Lesson...
The computer cannot give you what family, friends, and the bonds created between people who care about each other can give you. Go out and make memories, make moments, make life worth living.
-Kimmy