Kian was never supposed to be 'Mr Right', just a bit of fun..... a sort of fling! I had know Kian all my life, he used to be best friends with my older brother Steven, they'd been in the same year at school, I had been in the year below. I suppose if I'm honest with myself I did have a bit of a thing for him, but I was just a kid then. By the time Kian and Steven had left school they'd drifted apart .....Steven had discovered girls, and Kian had discovered music!
Over the next year or so I did wonder about Kian, so when I met him in a club a couple of weeks later I can't deny I was excited, and a little shocked! He was no longer the Kian I remember; he was no longer a skinny little boy with greasy hair. Kian Egan was now a very handsome young man. With his blonde hair and blue eyes he was every teenage girls fantasy.
"Kimmy Bear!" he cried throwing his arms around me as I cringed at the pet name he'd called me all those years before.
Sipping my vodka + Irn-Bru I told Kian all about Steven, how he was at University studying Politics. I told him all about me, how I'd just finished a two year course in Travel, and he told me all about him, and the band he was in. By the end of the night I found myself staring into his blue eyes, extremely fascinated by what he was telling me. That's why when he took my hand in his and kissed me, I didn't pull away! The next morning I woke up full of regrets. Kian just laughed as he listened to me babble on about how wrong it was about how all I was after was a one-night stand, a fling!
"Kimberley why was it so wrong?" he grinned lying completely naked on his bed. Staring at his naked package I couldn't take my eyes off the thing that had given me so much pleasure the night before.
"It just was." I blushed. "Kian cant you understand I was only after a one night thing?" I cried throwing my clothes on. "You do realise we'll never be able to be friends again don't you?"
"And whys that?" he asked standing up, walking towards me.
"You know why!"
"Do I?"
"Yes!"
"I don't think I do" Kian teased.
"You do!" I yelled suddenly remembering how annoying Kian could be.
"I honestly don't Kimmy Bear." He purred "You'll have to explain it to me."
"I've....I've....; I've seen you naked! I've touched that thing!" I cried blushing frantically pointing to Kian's naked lower half.
"So." Kian shrugged. "You can't tell me you didn't enjoy yourself."
"Well I......." I started to say, but Kian silenced me with a kiss and pulled me back under the duvet.
After that Kian and I were inseparable. We did everything together. I found myself falling for him.......fast! That's why 10 months later when he popped the question I only had one answer .....Yes! It wasn't the way I imagined the love of my life to propose. I'd always imagined sandy beaches, candle lit dinners, but to be honest I couldn't have cared less. I loved Kian to the bones and I was just glad he loved me back. We were sitting in the livingroom listening to the local radio station when the DJ announced
"Kimmy Bear! This is just for you." Then our song started.

You set my soul at ease
Chased darkness out of view
Left your desperate spell on me
Say you feel it too I know you do
I've got so much more to give
This can't die, I yearn to live
Pour yourself all over me
And I'll cherish every drop here on my knees


Staring at Kian through water filled eyes I couldn't believe it, he wasn't really the romantic type but just this little gesture meant so much to me.

I wanna love you forever
And this is all I'm asking of you
10,000 lifetimes together
Is that so much for you to do
Cos from the moment that I saw your face
and felt the fire of your sweet embrace
I swear I knew
I wanna love you forever
My mind fails to understand
What my heart tells me to do
And I'd give up all I have just to be with you
And that would do
I've always been taught to win
And I never thought I'd fail
Be at the mercy of a man,
I've never been
Now I only want to be right where you are
I wanna love you forever
And this is all I'm asking of you
10,000 lifetimes together
Is that so much for you to do
Cos from the moment that I saw your face
and felt the fire of your sweet embrace
I swear I knew
I wanna love you forever
In my life I've learned that heaven never waits
Let's take this now before it's gone
like yesterday
Cos when I'm with you there's nowhere else
That I would ever wanna be no
I'm breathing for the next second I can feel you
Loving me..I'm gonna Love
I wanna love you forever
And this is all I'm asking of you
10,000 lifetimes together
Is that so much for you to do
Cos from the moment that I saw your face
and felt the fire of your sweet embrace
I swear I knew
I wanna love you forever


"Kian....;" But he silenced me.
"Sshhh." He whispered placing his finger on my lips. "Kimmy Bear I love you. You know that right?" I nodded. "I wanna love you forever..... and I wanna be with you forever....will you marry me?" he asked going down on one knee.
"Yes! Yes!" I screamed planting kisses all over his face.
The next day Kian woke me early.
"Hi the future Mrs Egan!" He whispered dropping soft butterfly kisses on my lips.
"Hey Baby" I smiled stroking his cheek.
"I'm going out for a while. I wont be long." He promised
"Where are you going?" I quizzed.
"It's a surprise" he grinned.
"Please tell me." I pouted giving him Puppy Dog eyes.
"You'll see when I get back," he laughed pulling his jacket on. "Now go back to sleep."
"Cant you even give me a hint?" I asked
"Nope! Right I'm off. Bye Baby. Love you." He smiled giving me one last sweet kiss.
"Mmm" I mumbled falling back a sleep."
I wasn't sleeping long, only an hour or so when I woke with a jump. I heard someone banging on the front door with such a force I thought the glass panel was due to cave in. Clutching my stomach I knew it was the police, you know how people say you know a policeman's chap when you hear it? Well trust me, you do!
Running down the stairs I barely had time to tie the rope on my dressing gown. Slowly opening the door I gasped, I was right there were two police officers standing on my front door.
"Kimberley McLeod?" The tall dark haired officer asked. I could barely answer him, I was numb all over. I just knew something bad had happened.
"I'm Constable Fraser, and this is PC Green could we come in a minute?"
"What happened?" I cried as we sped to Sligo General Hospital.
"We don't know fully ourselves yet. All we know is there's been a really bad accident, and your fiancee was involved.
"Was it serious?" I babbled. "I mean will he be alright?"
"We don't know." The young PC said smiling apologetically "You'll find out at the hospital." Biting my lips till I tasted the coppery taste of my own blood I finally allowed myself to shed my first tear, which was to be the first of many!
By the time we got to the hospital I'd already accepted the worst. PC Green took me to the reception while Constable Fraser went to find out more.
"Hi this is Kimberley McLeod she's here about her fiancee Kian Egan!"
"Oh yes!" The small blonde haired girl said. "We've been expecting you. If you'd like to take a seat the doctor will be along in a minute."
"Whats wrong with him?" I sobbed. "Please tell me. Will he be alright?"
"I'm sorry I don't know anything. But please take a seat the doctor wont be long."
I hadn't been sitting long, just a minute or so when a short stubby grey haired man walked towards me.
"Kimberley?" He asked. I nodded. "I'm Doctor Malachy
"Where is he?" I asked calmly. Already knowing the worst. Sitting down Doctor Malachy explained.
"Kian was in a very bad accident. We've managed to revive him twice....but I'm afraid there's nothing more we can do."
"He's dead?" I managed to croak.
"No, not yet. However its only a matter of time." Letting the river of tears fall from my eyes I sobbed. How will I cope without him? I heard myself ask.
"Would you like to see him?" The doctor asked gently. Leading me to where Kian was I felt the bile in my stomach rise, the man that was lying on that bed wasn't Kian! Kian was gorgeous, this man, was covered with blood, and cuts. There was no way this man could be Kian. Could there?
"I'll leave you alone to say your goodbyes." The doctor whispered gently closing the door. Taking his hand I laid a soft kiss on it.
"Oh Baby. "I'm so sorry." I whispered hoarsely. "If it wasn't for me you'd never be in here." I didn't think for one second Kian could be listening to me, so I started to tell him how much I loved him.
"I know I don't say it as much as I should but..... I ........ I love you so much! I don't know how I'm going to cope without you. When you asked me to marry you lastnight I thought my heart was going to burst. I've never felt so much love for anyone Kian." For a couple of seconds I just watched him, he looked like he was sleeping. I still kept expecting him to wake up, tell me it was all a horrible joke.
"I love you Kian Egan..... I'll always love you!" I laid my head on Kian stomach; I closed my eyes and cried for what I was about to lose. The night I met Kian again I'd only been after a one-night stand, I had always been selfish when it came to men. Somehow they always gave me their heart but I'd never give mine in return. Until Kian!
I must have fallen asleep because when I woke up Kian was looking at me, for a split second I thought it was all a nightmare.
"Kian?" I whispered as fresh tears rolled down my cheek.
"He.....hey Baby!" Kian smiled breathlessly. Even saying two words made him breathless. For a few seconds we just stared at one another. I broke the silence,
"Kian you can't die! I need you!"
"You'll be fine." Kian reassured me. "Your strong."
"No I wont. I can't go on without you Kian. I love you so much, I need you. Please don't die!" I pleaded. Looking into his blue eyes, I remembered the sparkle that was once there. Now there were.....dead! Squeezing my hand Kian started to cough and splutter.
"Do you want me to get someone?" I cried jumping up in a panic.
"No." Kian croaked. "I wanna....I wanna.... spend m.....spend my last minutes with you."
"Kian I'm sorry." I wept clinging to the only man I have ever loved.
"Kimmy I love you. Always remember that OK?" I nodded. "Don't spend your life waiting for me Kimberley. I'll be up there!" He croaked pointing to the ceiling "Waiting for you."
"Promise?" I asked
"I promise with all my heart. I'll be up there waiting patiently for you." He smiled and for a split second I saw the twinkle creep back into his eyes.
"I love you Kimmy Bear. I'll love you forever"
"I love you too Ki." And with one last gently squeeze to my hand Kian was gone. As the machines beeped the nursed went about their business trying to bring him back, but we all knew it was no use we all. We all knew Kian was gone.
So you see Mr Right will pop up when you least expect him to. The day Kian died I thought my whole world had ended, but I carried around his words with me 'I'll be up there waiting for you!' for many years. And now as I lie here tied up to these machines I know it'll only be a few days, and then I can spend eternity with my fiancee!