MUSIC CLASS

By Dark Vortex and Rogue Phoenix.

We don't own Gundam, although we wish we did... All we own is some fanfics and fanart.


"All right, class!  Stop practicing and let's get started!"  Heero grimly began to tune his cello.  Duo, oblivious, continued pounding away at his giant double bass.
"WOOOOHHOOO!  SHINIGAMI IS BACK FROM HELL!"  (twang) (snap)
"Mr. Maxwell, IF you please!  Weren't you listening?" the teacher roared.  Duo quieted down with a last rebellious pizzicato note.
"Hmph."
"Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrroooooooooooooooooooooo!"  (glomp) (crash)
"Wak!"  Heero grabbed for his cello as it dropped.  He missed, his arms trapped by Relena's enthusiastic hug.
"Miss Peacecraft!  Aren't you supposed to be in Leadership class?"
"I'm staying with Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrroooooooooooooooooooooo!"  Relena bounced over to the piano and managed to butcher 'Hot Cross Buns.'
Heero picked up his wounded cello and snapped the broken bridge back into place.  Duo moaned.
"There he goes with that again.  I'm gonna be sick..."
Quatre messed around with his violin, playing random notes and smiling happily.  He looked up at the teacher.
"It's a pretty song!"  The teacher looked at him quizzically.  He got an angry look on his face.  "DO YOU NOT LIKE!?"  She fled.
(twang) (pop)
Wufei held up his viola, glaring at the offending instrument as though he were about to accuse it of besmirching his honor.  The teacher came over.
"Chang!  Did you break a string?"  Wufei turned red in rage.
"WOMAN!  HAVE YOU NO DIGNITY!!!! HOW DARE YOU USE MY GIVEN NAME!!"  He swung the viola.  She screamed, dropping and rolling like her clothes were on fire.  She crawled to the intercom button and dialed the office.
"Help!  My students... the Gundam pilots..."
"Just calm down, Mrs. Berlinarm," the person on the other end hollered, "we'll help you as soon as you tell us what--"
BANG.
Heero returned his gun to its hammer space pocket.  "Interference with my learning of music."  He went back to his cello.  Mrs. Berlinarm hid behind the piano and began to search for a way to escape and call 911.
Finding none, she decided to try one last time, standing up shakily.  She searched for someone halfway sane and spotted Trowa in a corner.
"Trowa!  What piece are you working on?" she asked brightly, edging as far away as she could from Wufei, who was now grumpily fighting with a string and muttering about dishonor.
Trowa looked up at her.  "Bach's 'Sixth Etude for Two Flutes,'" he said.
"Oh, my," Mrs. Berlinarm said.  "That's a very advanced piece.  Are you sure you're up to it?  And where's your other flute player?" 
Trowa glared.  "Yes, I'm sure.  And I play BOTH flute parts."
"Um, right.  That's nice.  Could you pass these out?" she asked, handing him a stack of music.
"'Lightly Row?'" Duo protested. "But we--"
"Now, if it's too hard, we can pick something nice and easy, but why don't we give it a try."  Everyone began to play slowly and with distaste.
"To Hell with this!"  Duo suddenly shouted, launching into a booming jazz solo.  It would have been very impressive if Relena hadn't played an incredibly painful chord just then.
"Mr. Maxwell!  Please stick to what everyone else is playing!  You don't want everyone else to feel left behind, do you?"
Everyone paused to glare at Mrs. Berlinarm.  Quatre went back to playing Mozart's 'Requiem.'  Trowa played blithely in the corner, sounding exactly like two flutes.  Heero glared threateningly and began to play the theme from James Bond.  Mrs. Berlinarm hid behind the piano again, then decided facing Heero was better than listening to Relena.  Wufei bellowed at his unresponsive viola, then began to play Mozart's 'Concerto in D Minor,' which shouldn't have been possible with only three strings.
"AAGH!"  Mrs. Berlinarm went fetal, shrieking until she caught a glimpse of the intercom, or what used to be the intercom, and promptly passed out.
The principal, the secretary, and half the police force burst in the door.  They were confronted with everyone playing their respective pieces, Relena pounding away at the piano, and Mrs. Berlinarm behind said piano in a comatose ball.
"What's going on here?"
"I dunno," Duo yelled, spinning the bass without missing a note.  "We all started playing like we are now and she passed out."
"Oh.  I see."  They blinked and left.
"Sooo... Who wants pizza?"