Title: A Dream Within A Dream

Author: Sarah

Rating: I'm sure at one point it'll be NC-17, but for now there's nothing
more than PG-13

Disclaimers: They're really mine, but you all were just tricked into
thinking they belonged to Joss? *coughs* Really, I swear I'm telling the
truth. *pauses* Anyone believe me? *hopeful look* And Taz (Purple Girl) is
Star's!

Notes: This is the sequel to Is It Love. It might be confusing, but I'm
trying to have it make as much sense as possible, really. The title is the
name of the poem used in the beginning.

Summary: Set after Graduation II, Faith wakes up from a coma, and is unsure
of what reality actually is.

Dedications: To Anne, as always it's her fic so I hope you like it babe! And
to Michele for being my beta and to everyone on PurpleGirl. Spread the love!
*hugs Star, Rach and Liv*

And also just to Liv because this chapter was supposed to be a lot more
angsty than it was but I can't seem to write it too well with her around!

******

"So you gonna tell me where I can get my stuff at?" I ask before shoveling
some more spaghetti into my mouth. I may be no world-class chef but it's
pretty damn good. Hell, Cordelia's eating it and I know that means it's
good. She's not the kind to eat something that sucks just to be polite.

"It's at your old apartment that the mayor gave you I'd assume," she sighed.
"I guess we can go tonight."

"You know it's not like I need you to do everything with or for me. I'm
perfectly capable of being on my own. I have memory loss, not a brain
tumor," I respond, not exactly happy with the way she's got that agitated
tone in her voice.

"Yeah, and what happens when you see Buffy and she kicks your ass again? Or
when you run into some vamp that sucks you dry because you’re still too
weak?"

"Yeah, a good lot of help you'd be with a vamp! What would you do? Throw
credit cards at it and beg it not to break your nails? I don't need your
fucking help. I want love dammit, not pity." I stand up from the table,
placing my plate in the sink before leaning against the counter to look back
at her. She's totally peeved, but for some reason that just makes me more
pissed off. She's treating me like a damn five year old, telling me I'm not
allowed to cross the street alone.

"You know what? Fuck you," she yells as she stands from the table. "You
wanna be a pain in the ass then go out and you can do whatever the hell you
want, and when you come back I'll be waiting with my I told you so's. You
want love you say? Blowing up on me for trying to help you and protect you
isn't going to get you very far. Maybe you're not that different from the
old Faith after all."

I watch as she storms out of the kitchen and shake my head. I didn't mean to
yell but how else am I supposed to act? She treats me like I'm glass that's
going to break the first time someone touches me. I don't need that. I don't
need anything or anyone, right? Letting out a long sigh I head up the stairs
to go apologize. I know she only wants to help, but how can she?

I knock on her door; feeling even more confused now than I did before, and
softly beat my head on the wall when I get no response from her. "Cordy,
come on. I'm sorry," I say to the door, making sure to be loud enough so
she'll hear me. Still no response. Was I that bad? I just want my fucking
clothes! I want to see everyone and get some sort of life started again. I
don't want to feel useless. "Come on doll, you know I'm not going to beg.
I'm sorry okay?" And still nothing. What the fuck? Letting out another sight
I push myself off the wall and rub my temples for a second. "I'm going out,
I'll be careful. Miss you."

I start to wonder how bad I pissed her off as I head out of the house. She
only wants to help and I go fucking up the one thing I do have now. Just
great. Well it's still not that late, maybe I can stop and get her something
before I come back? Heading towards the main roads I look around at my
surroundings, remembering so much yet nothing at all. At least nothing of
importance. Why can't I just go talk to the G-man about this? He'd
understand wouldn't he? But then I tried to kill his slayer, I suppose he
probably wants me dead too.

As I'm walking around town I'm taking time to notice all the people, hoping
someone would spark some sort of recognition in me. My slayer senses are
going haywire, telling me there's vamps all around but Cordy was right, I'm
in no condition to be taking them on. I stop to look in the windows of the
stores around me, looking for one that'll have something I can buy Cordelia
before I realize I've got no cash. No belongings. It's like this life isn't
even mine.

I keep walking until I get a really twisted idea and turn around to make my
way to the arcade. Okay, so this is probably the most retarded idea I've
ever had, but I really need some cash to get something for Cordelia. I see a
ton of kids, all ranging in ages from early teen to probably older than me
and I can't help but grin. I make my way towards the back of the arcade
where they've got a basketball hoop set up, one of those trick ones where
unless you're damn good you can waste all your cash and never get one shot
in.

I see a bunch of high school jocks trying to show off for their girlfriends
and smile wickedly. I suppose I was poor in this world too because I've
still got my ways of surviving with no cash. I move up next to the guy who's
just given the attendant five bucks. He takes his first shot, then his
second, third, fourth and fifth without making it in. I can't help but
laugh, he wasn't even close and he shoots me a very peeved look. "Maybe you
should stick to football, or something that doesn't actually require any
talent," I taunt, getting a kick out of the fact that he's starting to turn
red. I guess it's kinda mean to tease the kid in front of his friends but a
girls gotta do what a girls gotta do right?

"Like you could do any better?" He asks, wrapping his arm around his girl
possessively, probably trying to intimidate me. The first thing I notice is
that she's got this wicked purple hair that's kinda distracting. But she's
also really hot so I'm definitely not complaining.

"I could get it in, first shot." Guys are just too easy to bait. He tosses a
dollar at the guy working for the arcade and he hands me a ball.

"Lets see if you can back that mouth of yours up girlie."

I walk to where he's standing and push him gently out of the way. I can tell
his girl's probably getting jealous but I don't have the time to be bothered
by it. I take my shot, and just as I said I would I sink it, nothing but
net. The guy's just staring at me, and I feel bad once again. Maybe I should
have picked a different game. Too late now. The attendant standing by pulls
the ball out from the bottom of the long net and grabs a small stuffed
animal. "You can shoot more, the more you get the bigger prize you get or
you can keep this. What's your choice?"

I eye the small teddy bear he's holding and grin. "I'll take that," I smile
as I take the bear. It's good enough and there's no point in embarrassing
the kid anymore. "Thanks for the shot. Remember to look into that football
thing one day," I wink before walking away. Okay, so I couldn't help that
one. I'll be good now.

As I walk back out onto the main street I realize there's not much point in
me being out without C telling me where I can get my stuff. I start walking
back the long way, for some reason feeling the need to walk by the school. I
suppose it'd just be reassuring to see that it's something that still
exists. Except when I get there it's not what I expected. Sure it was still
in the same place it just wasn't actually standing. What the fuck happened?

"Like what you've done?" I hear a voice ask from behind me. A smile lights
up my face for all of five seconds when I recognize the voice but as soon as
I turn around and see her hateful eyes starting back at me everything falls
apart.

"I...I did this?" I ask, dumbfounded at the thought. Sure I never liked
school but why the fuck would I tear one down?

"Don't play dumb Faith. If you didn't go psycho slut on me and joined the
mayor none of this would have happened."

"I don't know what you're talking about, B. Honest I don't. I don't remember
anything."

"Like your word means much to me?" she asks as she moves closer to me. I
suppose C was right, I wasn't ready for this because I have no idea how to
handle this situation. This isn't the B that I spent years flirting with,
and years getting close to. This isn't my best friend. This is someone who
hates me; I can feel it radiating from her. "I'll make you a deal, you make
sure I never see you again and I won't kick your ass. I owe you that much,
but next time everything’s game. And I will get you back for what you've
done."

She starts walking away from me but I grab her arm. I can't let her go. I
need answers. I need something. Anything. Of course that probably wasn't the
wisest move because the second I touch her she spins around and hits me
right in the face, catching me off guard and knocking me over. "Oops,
must've slipped," she snorts as she glares at me.

The next thing I know I feel arms around me but just before I panic I
realize that it's someone trying to protect me. I crane my neck and look
back to find Cordelia there glaring at Buffy. "Umm doll, not that I'm
complaining, but why the hell are you here?" I ask as she helps me back up.

"I realized that I was being a bitch when you left and I got worried about
you," she smiles as she took my hand in her own.

"What the hell is going on?" Buffy yells, interrupting my moment. I always
knew she was a pain in the ass, but I still love her. "How long have you
known about Faith and not told us?"

"Not that long. Chill blondie."

"How the fuck can I chill when you've been keeping the fact that a killer is
just walking around. And now you're friends? Were you just going to sit by
and wait for her to try and kill us all again?"

"I don't remember all that B," I answer, unsure of what else to say, or do.

"Shut up Faith," both girls snap at me.

"She doesn't remember it Buffy. She's a different person now." Cordy
squeezes my hand in reassurance and I just watch, noting the tension between
the two.

"Yeah right. What the hell did she do to you? She's Faith and she's a
fucking nutcase."

"You know if you'd stop being such a self righteous, hypocritical bitch for
a minute you might actually be able to see that it's true. You say she's the
nutcase? Well what about what you did to her? You're the one who gutted her
and stuck her in a coma. And what about that dream you said you had that
night, the one where she helped to tell you how to stop the mayor? You so
easily forget the good she did don't you? I'm not saying your wrong for
being skeptical, or even wrong for hating her. But at least give her a
fucking chance. People change, because I'm one of those people who have."

"Whatever, I'm so not dealing with this now. I have to finish my patrol," B
mumbled in droll tones as she walked away.

As soon as she was out of sight Cordelia pulled me into a hug and I couldn't
help but smle again. When she pulled away I held up the small teddy bear
that I won her and smiled sheepishly. "I'm sorry, for everything."

Her smile grew so wide I couldn't help but match my own with hers before she
threw her arms around me again and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek. "Well
then I think it's established that we're both sorry. Now what do you say we
get you home before anything else happens?"

Nodding softly I pull away from her, feeling decidedly bad about causing her
this trouble. I suppose she noticed because I felt her cupping my face in
her hands beore kissing me softly. "It'll be okay, I promise."

I'm not sure why, but I've got a feeling that she just might be right...

TBC.....