Disclaimers: Joss owns all BTVS characters, not me. I own Discord, Elle, Lucy and Bee.
Title: No Doubt own 'Too Late' where the line is from. It's a beautiful song.
Dedications: To Eliza Dushku, and her quote on fighting: "I recently had a catfight outside this bar. I almost broke this chick's nose." Lol, YOU RULE!
Roman Numerals: I know they are wrong, but as in SDV, I like the 4 X's.
 
Dawn's POV
 
Slayers Do Christmas XXXX - Compulsion Has Stained Me
 
'Karen, I told you, he sooo likes me, he keeps giving me packs of Oreos! Oh, as if I'd like him? He's a dweeber of major...'
 
Huh?
Where'd the bedroom go?
 
I look round and see; Buffy and Faith?
My sister's like some bad stuff magnet!
 
'Dawn?! Elle, what's she doing here? Dawn, come over here!'
 
'God, Buffy, take a pill! What's happening? Why am I here? I was in the middle of a really important conversation that I need get back to, like, now!'
 
She grabs hold of my arm, and pulls me over to Faith and... wow, is that Sarah Jessica Parker?
Faith knows so many famous people!
Why can't she be my sister?
 
'Don't curse God, Dawn!'
 
'Did I forget to send you a card for your sixtieth, Buffy?'
 
She's worse than mom, sometimes.
Do this, do that, don't do that, though, and don't say that!
 
'Dawn, hello. Delight to meet you finally. Come and stand here, next to me, you can tell me what's going on in Dark Angel, I keep missing it. You watch it, right?'
 
'It's one of my favourites!'
 
I look round, into this arena thing and see Xena, in... wow, hardly any clothes!
Avert eyes, look at Buffy or something.
Ok, when I get home I'm asking mom if we can adopt Faith.
She has, the coolest friends.
First Xena, then Sarah Jessica Parker.
 
My life's the best, ever!
 
Discord's POV
 
Be focused, Dis, kick some Demon ass and everything will be cool.
I roll my shoulders and click my neck.
 
'Dizzy, come here for a minute will you?'
 
I take a run up, and forward flip over to her.
 
'I know, Elle, I'm a show off, but if you've got it, then flaunt it.'
 
'No arguments from me there. You've got it, and packed it into a skimpy outfit as well. Bravo, Dizzy. Listen, spoke to Lucy, there's a small change over her warrior.'
 
She's fiddling with her nails, and I know I'm not going to like what she tells me next.
 
'Hit me with it, Elle. What's she pulling now?'
 
'She doesn't have a warrior.'
 
'So we win! Hey, easiest fight I've ever...'
 
'No, Dizzy, she's her own warrior. You're going to be fighting Lucifer for Dawn's soul.'
 
Crap.
 
Faith's POV
 
'Shut up, I'm fine over here, I'm going to talk to Carrie, from Sex in The City. I don't want to stand over there with you, Buffy, people will think you're with me or something.'
 
'And you almost gave your soul up for that... brat!!'
 
Eternal struggle?
Shit, man, this is the eternal, fuckin' struggle; Clash of the Summers sisters!
 
'Jealous much, sis?'
 
'Ok, Dawn, you keep talking to Carrie, ask her how filming's going while you're there. Stand in-between us, Faith, before I kill her!'
 
Great, me in the middle, again.
I know they love each other, but they've got the funniest way of showing it.
Just as I'm thinking how I'm going to stop Dawn and B from catfighting [ŠED] their way through the fight, the lights start flashing and Bee comes in, dressed in a skimpy bikini, with a mic.
This is surreal, like... shit, it's just plain surreal!
 
'Welcome to the Clash of Heaven and Hell! In the white corner, we have Discord, killer and super strengthed... yeah, whatever, and in the red corner we have Her Flaminess, the woman of everyone's nightmares, killer since time forgot, put your hands together for Lucifuge Rofocale, not at all commonly, but still much referred to as, The Devil!'
 
Dis walks into the centre of the arena floor, and does that shoulder clicking thing that makes my skin creep.
Then two doors open and out walks... fucking Hell, literally, Lucy, man, that's some chick!
I start laughing, I know this isn't meant to be funny, but it's so weird.
Lucy's in tight leathers, waving some big, old sword round like a Ninja.
She's got that Callisto thing going on, you know, she does look abit like Callisto.
Fuck, man, this just gets more and more freaky.
Xena and Callisto, fighting it out, total head fuck!
Her leathers, woo; they're nice, you know, not taking sides 'n' all.
Faith, she's the Devil, she's trying to kill Dis, and steal Dawn's soul.
Keep it in your pants!
 
Just to prove I'm under control, I give Dis a holler.
 
'Rip a limb off for me, Dis!'
 
She looks up at me and winks.
 
Then, I get ready for all Hell to break loose, literally!