| MYSTERY MP3!!! |
Some times you spend so much of your life with someone that if you don't make up fun little games to play then they would have an ice pick in their head. Hence, MYSTERY MP3S!! The Pope, being the walking encyclopedia that he is has chosen a few tunes that Ms. Jennifer has to review. The catch is that she doesn't know what he will put on and she only has a minute to write. Here is the result: 1) Cheerleader- Shit City “I would play this at work to get rid of the yuppie assholes – Crunchy, fuzzy and classic PUNK FUCKING RAWK – Lovely.” The Pope sez: One of the Great White hopes of the Great White North. The Popette hits the nail on the head. Wanna check it out? Go to the links page (Cheerleader, stupid!). 2) Malakas – Pawnshop “Yeoaww!! I could dance to this with my mom on a drunken Christmas Eve. A little bitter in a country way like only the Malakas can do.” The Pope sez: My current favourite fucking band. Cranford Nix was a gutter poet whom you should all familiarize yourself with. (again, see the links page) 3) Lester Bangs – Legless Bird “This makes me think of a strip club where all the girls are too smart to be there but do it cause it's fun, and some of them are boys. Swanky.” The Pope sez: A track from the greatest rawk writer’s most listenable album-- check it out. 4) Ringworm – Necropolis “At a concert your hair would be blowing backwards as some idiot with razor blades sewn into his jacket gyrates beside you and you love it.” The Pope sez: Brutal hardcore from Cleveland! Formed from the ashes of the also great Integrity. Click here. 5) Scratching Post – Touch and Go “Hmmm. This makes me think of being in a bar full of people that wear too new clothes.” (Ms. Jennifer notes afterwards: I would seriously like to um...look into Nicole's eyes. ;) The Pope sez: Nevermind the Popette, she’s just a girl. More hope for Canada to be forgiven for unleashing the likes of Avril Lavigne and Nickelback upon your tortured ears. Here be the link. 6) Reverend Bizarre – Fucking Wizard “If this was your favourite band the beginning of the song will have you cumming with anticipation. When does it kick in? Now? NOW? Oh…. I get it.” The Pope sez: In all fairness, Popette only got to hear the first few minutes o’ this mighty epic. It’s fifteen minutes plus. The kings of doom metal! Check it out here. 7) My Dying Bride – Raven and Rose “Makes me think of being a kid and finding out that Alice Cooper is a boy and the whole world changes after that. Spooky and delicious.” The Pope sez: If you don’t know the greatness of My Dying Bride by now, uh well, you suck. Regardless, break your cherry here. |
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| The Challenge!! |
| FUN! INFORMATIVE! EDUCATIONAL! |
| All right cretins, I know you're thinking "Holy Geez! How can I get in on this?!" Well, the challenge is out: The Fucking Pope wants to see if YOU have what it takes to review a handfull o' his favourite tunes. There are three rules for playing. First: You gotta have a web site or something so that we can see your writing and deem you worthy. Second: Literacy is a must, unless, of course, you are a cute girl who swings. Third: Ya can't suck. Email us if you dare to accept. |
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| Ms. Jennifer |
| The Fucking Pope |