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"Cool Quotes" Archive

 

What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is.

  • Dan Quayle

 

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.

  • Kaiser Wilhelm

A hard man is good to find.

  • Mae West

 

Shopping is better than sex. If you're not satisfied after shopping, you can make an exchange for something you really like.

  • Adrienne Gusoff

 

The code of the schoolyard, Marge! The rules that teach a boy to be a man. Let's see. Don't tattle. Always make fun of those different from you. Never say anything, unless you're sure everyone feels exactly the same way you do.

  • Homer Simpson

 

The problem with the world is that everyone's is a few drinks behind.

  • Humphrey Bogart

 

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.

  • Garrison Keillor

 

To attract men I wear a perfume called, 'New Car Interior.'

  • Rita Rudner

 

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.

  • Dave Barry

 

What do people mean when they say the computer went down on  them?

  • Marilyn Pittman

 

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