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Philip K. Pejorative is a play on sci fi author Philip
K. Dick.
I wrote this article but Terry kind of fucked it up a
bit. The idea was this father transplants his himself and little hoodlum
children to Windsor. Like most
over-proud parents, he thinks his children are smart. But they're really
just little thugs.
At first the kids find Windsor
boring. Not enough to occupy their little criminal minds. But then they
turn on Detroit TV and realize the gauntlet has been thrown down.
For reasons unknown, Terry changed "zebra mussel
shakes to mollusk shakes".
Terry did, however, ultimately rescue the piece by
throwing in the bit about the kids' mother at the end. All is forgiven,
Terry.
The article was ultimately a poke at the reaction
non-Windsorites have to Detroit TV. People in the rest of Ontario
and Canada
pretty much grow up on a diet of Canadian TV and American network TV out of
fairly benign places like Vermont,
upstate New York, and Seattle.
Detroit TV, however, is a whole new world of horrors.
First there are the daily multiple murders, the rapes, and the arsons. Then
there are the commercials -- commercials for guard dogs, alarm systems,
bars on your windows, and slip-and-fall lawyers.
Terry, however, decided to throw in a bunch of crap
about the kids working on the unified field theory.
Anyway, when it's 3 am
and this is the last article to go on a flat before the printers, you no
longer want to fight for your original idea.
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