This is a stupid idea I know. I'm no doubt wrong. But... just in case....

Don't feel bad. Impossible idea?? NOt a chance? First law - nobody can make you feel ANYTHING. Rules of the game. Whenever we are happy, sad, embarassed, angry, ashamed, nervous, frigthened, etc, it's because we CHOOSE to feel that. True. So your first step is not to feel bad. Why? You've done nothing wrong. I think it's fair to say you made a MISTAKE. We all make mistakes all the time. Nothing but mistakes. Well, me anyway. :) Usually there is always something to laugh about as well - no matter how bad it seems to be. Really. What happened IS kinda funny. But I know it will be very hard for you to laugh at that.

People. I bet they look at you different. But in the end who cares? Easy for me to say eh!?! Yup. But i feel it's good advice anyway. Anybody who is worth being called a friend by you won't look at you like you have done something "bad". If they do - don't deal with them - or if you must, do so with just dignity. THEY are the ones with the problem! Same thing with family - except I suppose they will always be family. You haven't done ANYTHING "bad". Really - loads of people do that kind of stuff all the time - it's fun. The difference here is you trusted somebody who in the end you couldn't trust. Is that such a bad thing for a person to do? Of course it isn't. The consequences HAVE been bad for you - that sucks - but that is life. What's done is done and there's nothing you can do now except walk on. But this doesn't need to diminish what you do with your life ONE LITTLE BIT. My (probably bad) advice is to accept that people ain't gonna forget this, and maybe you should just look at it as one of those things that can happen to people. It ain't fair - sure - but there's nothing to be gained AT ALL by saying "not fair". It just is.

Like I said anyone who is worth dealing with will see this as "entertainment gone wrong" or something like that. What I see (and you may cringe) is a fantastic young lady who is willing to go to amazing lengths to make her partner happy. If I knew you - and the chances of that are less than great :) - i would be (and I know this sounds real dumb) in awe of you. And I wouldn't think anything else.

People are great - people will generally understand things when they are put in perspective for them. This situation ain't gonna be put in perspective for them. That's something else you need to accept in my (probably wrong) opinion. It's not really their fault - they just can't see to the heart of the matter. Don't konw why - but that doesn't matter either - another of those things that "just is". Don't fight it or hope it will change. It won't.

So - back to the first law - nobody can make you FEEL anything. YOU can feel however you want. So feel HAPPY! All the time! Easy!!

Paul