Summary: When Lyria Strider returns to Hogwarts to teach DADA, an old enemy is the only one who's not glad to see her.  How will the school cope with quarreling teachers?

 

A/N: It all belongs to J.K.R.  Lyria, however, was invented by me, and I love her and guard her jealously.  If you want to use her just ask, I promise I’ll let you!  You will find some references to “Keeping Up Appearances” here, but you don’t have to read it first to read this.  Please enjoy!! 

 

 

If there was one thing Severus Snape hated about teaching (besides the students), it was staff meetings. 

 

This one, however, had the potential to be a rare disaster.  As usual, Dumbledore had gathered the staff the morning before the students were due to arrive, mostly so they could review the usual and meet the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher.  However, neither the headmaster nor the new teacher had arrived yet.

 

He put on his most unpleasant look and checked his watch again.  Yes, they were now officially seventeen minutes late.

 

As if on cue, the door opened, and Albus Dumbledore entered, followed by a woman.

 

So, now they were giving the job that should rightfully be his to a female.  An idiot, a werewolf, and a Death Eater weren’t insulting enough, now they’d give the job to a midget of a woman who probably couldn’t even hold a wand properly.  Yes, he was bitter.  He had the right to be.

 

She sat down in the Defense Against the Dark Arts chair, next to his, and he got a good look at her face.  There was something familiar about her...

 

She seemed attractive enough, in a natural way.  Brown hair hung down to her chin in fluffy, uncontrollable waves.  Steely blue gray eyes were framed by silver glasses, which rested on an inconspicuous nose.  There were a few slight scars here and there, but the face had hardly changed at all...

         

“No.”  He said flatly.  “Professor, I refuse to believe you’ve hired her...”

 

“I hate you too,” she replied sharply.

 

“Charming as ever, I see,” he snarled.

 

“Well, yes, it *is* nice to see you again.  And look, I don’t think you’ve washed your hair since the last time we met.  How nice.”  Lyria Strider flashed that infuriating smirk at him. 

 

“How are you coping with being by yourself?  After all, it must be lonely without bedding your murdering boyfriend all the time,” Snape replied.

 

“What, hoping to be my source of comfort?  Don’t hold your breath.”

 

“If we could continue, please,” Dumbledore interrupted, looking slightly bemused. 

 

They both shut up.

 

Dumbledore went over the usual rules, policies, and other foolishness before sending them off.  “Severus, perhaps you could help Lyria settle in?”

 

He fought the urge to simply strangle her and take care of the problem then and there.  “I’d be delighted,” he snapped, stalking out.

 

 

“Could you not drop my things all over the place?!?  Some of that breaks, you know!”  Lyria hollered.

 

“Then carry it yourself,” he replied with a snarl.

 

“Someday, your face is going to stick that way, and no one’s going to notice,” she warned.

 

“And someday, if there is a God, you will go away,” he replied.  “Did he hire you specifically to aggravate me, or is that just your gift to me in addition to your ever-infuriating presence?”

 

“He hired me to teach.  I’m not sure what you do here,” she said innocently.  She always did have a talent for pissing him off, might as well put it to use.  “Now who do I have the delight of sitting next to during meals?”

 

“Seating at the head table is the same as it always was,” Snape replied.  “I won’t talk to you if you don’t talk to me.”

 

At that moment, a giant black dog bounded into the room and nearly bowled him over.  “What the bloody hell is that beast doing here?!?”

 

“Oh, this is Padfoot, my pet,” Lyria replied.  “He’s very intelligent, for a dog.”

 

“Keep it away from me,” he warned, leaving the room and slamming the door behind him.

 

“Very intelligent for a dog?”  A voice asked.  Padfoot had resumed human form.

 

Lyria smiled at Sirius.  “What did you want me to say, that you were very intelligent for an Animagus?”

 

They laughed a bit before Sirius resumed his dog form and they went down to the welcome feast.

 

 

 

“I thought I told you to keep that thing away from me,” Snape snapped as soon as she sat down.

 

“He doesn’t bite.  Usually.”

 

Things seemed to be going from bad to worse lately.  “I don’t want it near me.”

 

“Then move.”

 

He settled for giving the dog a menacing look and turning his attention to the sorting ceremony.

 

Strider also turned her attention to the ceremony, clapping politely for all the students as they were sorted. 

 

“Never thought I’d see the day you’d applaud for a Slytherin,” he commented.

 

“Never thought I’d see the day you taught.  But then again, Potions, I shouldn’t be surprised.  And favoring all of your own, I imagine...”  Lyria trailed off.

 

“Because, naturally, you wouldn’t dream of favoring Gryffindors,” he replied sarcastically.

 

“Haven’t we all got a pet house?” she replied.  “Some of us are just more obvious than others about it.”

 

He thought for a moment that she had a point there, but of course said nothing out loud.  “You’re not as stupid as I usually give you credit for.”

 

“You’re not as smart as you give yourself credit for, either.”  She replied with a smile.

 

‘Yes, Severus, she just insulted you when you were being civil with her.  Take note of that, and never, ever do it again,’ he thought, mentally kicking himself.  “Must be a flaw you’re familiar with, Strider.”  He glanced at her hand as she picked up her fork.  “Still wearing that ring of his, are you?  Why not just give up?”

 

“Because despite his faults, I love Sirius, which is of course something you’re totally unfamiliar with.”  Lyria responded flatly.

 

“I don’t think mass murder qualifies as a minor character flaw.”  He picked up his own fork.

 

“Must be something you’re familiar with, Snape,” she replied with a mocking sneer.

 

It was not going to be an enjoyable term.

 

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