Kevin, Lucy, and Noses

(Kevin, wearing an open-necked cream shirt and no jacket, sits at his desk. Lucy, wearing a large hat, sunglasses and a bright pink trench coat, makes an attempt to sneak into his office.)

K: "Hi, Lucy."

L: "You're not supposed to know who I am."

K: "Who are you trying to be?"

L: "Anybody but me. You know, after that humiliating fiasco at the Nurses' Ball, I just didn't want to face anybody. In fact, I was going to lock myself in my room today and just stay there, but then, I realized, no, you need to vote. I'm the loyal patriotic American, I need to go down to Luke's and vote. So, I didn't have much time for a disguise, you know and I just thought if I did this, maybe no one would notice me. I could just walk by. Whaddya think?"

K: "I think you'd draw a lot less attention to yourself if you just went as Lucy."

(Kevin studies her.)

L: "What is it? Are my eyes still all puffy?"

K: "No, no, your eyes are beautiful. I just hate to see them so sad."

L: "Whaddya expect? I think this is called post-traumatic shock. You know, you should know about this, Doctor."

K: "Lucy..."

(Kevin stands. Lucy is near tears.)

L: "No, no, please, don't. OK? You're not going to make me feel any better. You can't. You know, I have had so many embarrassing moments at those darned Nurses' Balls, but this has to be the absolute worst. It was bad enough looking down and seeing that ridiculous dress on my body, but then to be hoisted up by one leg, with that stupid dress over my head and swinging out in front of the audience... It was so humiliating. I made a complete fool of myself and that is what everybody is thinking."

K: "My guess is, everyone has already forgotten about it."

L: "Oh, no, no way. It's the hot dish all over town, over their darling little bacon and eggs."

K: "Let it go, Lucy."

L: "That's easy for you to say. Nobody saw you in your underwear last night."

(Kevin is clearly trying to coax a smile from Lucy.)

K: "That's not entirely true."

(Later, Kevin sits on his sofa, a pillow in his lap. Lucy, lying down, rests her head on the pillow. Kevin strokes her hair.)

L: "Doc, I need a favor."

K: "Name it."

L: "If, no, not if, when, I murder Katherine Bell, I need to know that you'll testify I was provoked into complete insanity."

K: "You're not going to murder Katherine Bell."

L: "I wouldn't be so sure. She completely ruined my big night."

K: "Well, think about it. Was the night really ruined?"

L: "I was swinging by one leg in my garters like a human pendulum. What do you think?"

K: "Well, I think that you're losing the big picture, again, but let's stay with you as the subject for just another moment. Do you realize that every time one of these incidents has befallen you, it's really just succeeded in turning you into a heroine."

L: "Really? You think?"

K: "I know so. You realize every time you just plow forward with your focus firmly on the prize--which is what? Money for the AIDS program- -that every time you do better than the year before. You're becoming legendary, Lucy."

L: "I am, aren't I?"

K: "Yes, you are. I'm very proud to be the man you love."

L: "You did it, again. How come you always know how to make me feel better?"

K: "I'm a genius."

L: "I can't argue with that."

(They kiss, but, since they're kissing, there's the requisite interruption. This time, it's a knock at the door. Lucy abruptly sits up. Kevin moves the pillow then seems to decide it serves him better staying in his lap.)

K: "Come in..."

(It's Bobbie, asking about an emergency counselling session for Lucky.)

(The next time we see Kevin and Lucy, Lucy is standing, powdering her nose.)

L: "My nose is still all puffy."

K: "Oh, your nose looks delicious."

(Kevin's action has to be seen to be believed. I guess you could say he had a taste for Lucy. And I think only Kevin could make this move work. Lucy seems stunned, but is laughing. And Kevin has got the biggest smile...)

L: "What are you doing? Stop that. I kinda liked it... it's weird."

K: "But you liked it. I got a lot more weird where that came from. I'll show it to you, later."

L: "OK, I'll have that to look forward to, that'll get me through the day. No, it won't..."

K: "Twice as much money as last year, not including Sonny's thirty million dollars. Lucy, you are a marvel."

L: "OK, I'm a marvel."

K: "You're a marvel. You're a marvel. You're a marvel. You are a marvel. You're a marvel."

(Lucy exits as Lucky enters.)

Lucy: "Lucky, hi."

Kevin: "Lucky, that woman is a marvel."

Lucy: "I'm a marvel."

Kevin: "An absolute marvel. Good-bye, my marvel."

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