Kevin, Lucy, and Frozen Peas
A million thanks to Alicia for transcribing this episode!

(Open to a smoke alarm sounding and Lucy coughing)

K: Lucy, Lucy where are you? What's burning?

L: It's ok. It's just breakfast burning. See I was trying to make the coffee just the way you like it, then the eggs started burning so I tried to save the eggs but the same time the bacon started burning and so then I just threw more in there and then everything started burning and now we don't have anything left.

K: It's ok...no big deal.

L: No it's not ok, it is..it's a big deal. It's not ok. I just wanted to do something really special and different for you.

K: Lucy everything you do is special.

L: Oh you're just saying that.

K: And I mean every word of it.

(smoke alarm goes off again)

L: Uh-oh

K: Uh-oh what?

L: The coffee pot. When I was trying to save the eggs and the bacon I shoved it in without any water....it's on the burner!!!

K: Good morning, welcome to a day in the life of Lucy Coe.

L: I can't believe it.

K: Dead coffee pot huh?

L: Oh boy, it's so dead on an empty stomach you don't even want to go near that kitchen.

K: Oh come here, let's just forget about the coffee.

L: I really wanted to start your day off with something nice and warm.

K: Well how about something sweet and warm..one of a kind. (Just as Kevin is leaning in for a kiss, the doorbell rings) It's a little early for company isn't it?

L: Oh no, I forgot. I ordered brunch from the P.C. Grill. I will take care of everything you just sit there and read your paper.

K: Lucy...(motioning to the robe he is wearing which happens to be Lucy's)...might be a bit chilly don't you think?

L: Oh...well give me my robe.

K: Just let me get it.

L: Are you sure you wanna be seen like that?

K: Why not I might start a fashion trend. (Kevin opens the door to an angry neighbor holding Siggy) Good mor...DUCK?

Guy: You got it pal.

L: Sigmund you got out of the yard again (grabbing for him)

Guy: (pulling Siggy back) Not so fast.

L: Wait a minute! Give me my duck.

Guy: Your duck bit my dog lady.

L: Well I'm sure your dog must have provoked my duck. (To Siggy) Are you ok?

Guy: That thing's probably got rabies.

K: Ducks don't have rabies.

Guy: Well that's easy for you to say Mary Sunshine, but that is not an ordinary duck(the guy is poking Kevin in the chest)

K: You're gonna lose that finger pal.

Guy: Look I want some compensation and I want it now or else.

K: Or else what?

Guy: Or else this....(the guy puches Kevin in the face to which he responds by rolling up his sleeves and charging at the guy. The next scene we see Kevin laying on the couch with a bag of frozen peas on his head.)

L: I sent Sigmund to his room on a time out, how are you feeling?

K: Like a man with a sack of frozen peas on his head.

L: Oh I still say we should have had that hothead arrested.

K: Oh let it go Lucy, I wasn't exactly Mr. United Nations myself. Besides, I got a few good licks in.

L: Um, ya sure did. But I just picture that guy at home with some vegetable on his head melting and running down his big ugly schnoz.(Kevin laughs). I was not trying to be funny.

K: Oh Lucy you don't have to try. Look around..the kitchen's a disaster, I look pretty damn good in your robe and I have a bag of peas as an accessory.

L: I guess I should be laughing.

K: Yes you should, so why aren't you?

L: Because when you went to get the peas from the kitchen, these arrived for me.

K: It's your divorce papers...are you having second thoughts?

L: Oh no, no not at all. This is what Scott and I agreed on.

K: But...

L: But it's just like tangible evidence of me making a mess of my life all the time.

K: Lucy, you're being too hard on yourself.

L: No Doc I'm not. I just...I just want one thing, Just one thing to go absolutely right instead of everything always going haywire.

K: Shhh...come here, come here. This is right. Don't you see that? This is as right as it gets.

L: You know, after everything we've been through don't you think we deserve normal? I mean haven't we earned normal?

K: Lucy this is normal for us.

L: Well than can't we maybe change it?

K: Well even if we could I wouldn't change a minute of the time we spend together. Well most of it anyway. The point is we've lived alot and we've learned alot from our mistakes.

L: I think we made an awful lot of mistakes don't you?

K: Well we've just traveled alot of different roads and that's what's brought us to where we are now. You see the thing is...we made it. We're right where we're supposed to be...together.

L: So you're saying we've become indestructible is that what you're saying?

K: What I'm saying is I have no regrets. You're one of a kind Lucy and you trying to change is like.....

L: What, like what?

K: Like trying to throw a blanket over a shooting star.

L: A shooting star huh?

K: Ya, a whole shower of them. (and of course we end with a kiss)

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