Lindsay storms into Bobby's office. Lightening flashing in her eyes, black clouds evident threatening to burst into a torrent of rain. Thunder in her voice and snow on her shoulder, actually that's probably dandruff so we'll just ignore that and move on. There's no hail, so it isn't a really big storm. Although maybe she could say, "Hail Bobby!" but, no, that would be stupid, wouldn't it?

Anyway, when Bobby looked up, she angrily said, "This has got to stop! Something needs to be done! It's gone too far!" Bobby's a man so Lindsay has to say everything three times before there is any chance he'll hear her. As it is his intelligent response is, "Huh?" Luckily it's an American show or it would have been, "Woman where's me beer!"

"Something needs to be done, Bobby. I'm sick of him humping every piece of furniture and drooling over everything that moves. It's embarrassing and he's only getting worse."

"Still?" Bobby says, hoping if he keeps delaying his actions the problem will just go away. Men!

"Yes still," she snaps back, "what are you going to do about it?"

"Ah? Do? Me?" Bobby asks, then hearing the phrase, 'do me,' echoing through his mind, he gets an idea and looks up at Lindsay hopefully.

"Bobby!" she warns, "We can't keep putting this off, it has to be done."

"I know it's just ..." His face grimaces, his eyes go glassy and he crosses his legs.

She groans, "Either he gets neutered or you may as well be, because until he stops humping, we won't start."

Bobby is out of his chair and grabbing his jacket before Lindsay has even finished her sentence. "Lets go!"

Bobby practically sprints down the hallway towards the elevators. The object of all Lindsay's frustration following along behind them despondently, tail firmly between his legs.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After an extremely long wait and a number of embarrassing incidents involving chairs, desks, a startled nurse, and a pot plant whose leaves had waved, 'oh so enticingly,' Bobby and Lindsay were shown into a consulting room.

"Dr Barker will be right with you," the receptionist said before screeching as something unexpected ran up her leg.

"Dr Barker," Bobby laughed when they were again alone, "like I'm supposed to believe that's his real name."

"It is and it's a she"

"A vet with the name Barker? Come on, that's as implausible as a lawyer named Su."

"For your information Mr Su's an exceptional lawyer," Lindsay replied.

Bobby looked at her disbelievingly.

"He drew up our prenup," she said smugly.

"We have a prenup?" Bobby asked surprised.

"And our joint will."

"We have a joint will?" Bobby asked, wondering why they'd need to protect their assets. He far prefers getting them out there and into sticky situations than protection. I mean it isn't like he's a lawyer and knows the importance of legal documents .... what was that? He is a lawyer ... oh shit, that changes everything then. Dammit, I don't think my story makes sense now. Oh well, I've gone this far, I may as well finish.

"We most certainly do have a will."

"And why do I have no recollection of signing these documents?"

"Let's just say, after certain activities and I've performed certain maneuvers, you are willing to sign anything I put in front of your face. In fact sex makes you very ... amenable Bobby."

"Did you know amen means exalting approval?"

"What's your point?"

"I'm just thinking it's you who becomes amenable. First I make you scream out with joy .. amen ... and then you lose all coherency, and all I get from your little lips is something unintelligible that sounds like ... ablul. So I think it's you who is amen-ablul after sex."

"I'm not the one who has no recollection of signing important documents, Bobby."

"You do have a point ... in fact honeybuns you have two very good points."

Lindsay feels said points harden and cry for Bobby. Damn grace and finesse certainly have a mind of their own sometimes. She spies the stainless steel bench behind him and her knees go week. "Have I ever mentioned how stainless steel turns me on Bobby?" she asks in a husky purr. Hey if you're surrounded by animals you may as well act like them. (Oh Ally that isn't meant as career advice ... maybe it's just me but I think people would be scared off if you moo and bark at them. Then again I'm sure there are some who'd like that. I don't know I don't get out much. Have I gone off topic again?)

"God you're worse than Livvy is there anything that doesn't turn you on?" Bobby asks adding one more thing to his list of need-to-buy-more-of's.

Lindsay looks across the room and points, "Him salivating over us as we do it."

Much to Jimmy's distress he finds himself dragged from the room and tied to a chair. "Sit!" Bobby commands before hurrying back. Removing his tie he walks lecherously towards her, "Now where were we?"

Lindsay lays back delighting in the feel of cold hard steel underneath her and hot hard steel above. Bobby's hands run over her legs, pushing her skirt up, before unceremoniously tearing her pantyhose off. His fingers are just heading for their desired destination when the door opens and a startled squeak greets them.

Dr Barker stands perplexed, does she stop this man marauding this poor woman on her nice clean bench, or does she stand and watch? This is more of a dilemma than poor Dr Darren found himself in last week. You do know about Dr Darren don't you? Well just in case you don't here's the story (and no I'm not just trying to make this story longer without actually having to write it myself. Would I do something like that? I'm just forwarding this information because I do believe it is relevant and a lesson I hope you learn from. You know how you get those emails sent that have such a feel good upstanding message. Email is such a wonderful thing for the social conscience. I know it has made me a better person. Anyway I'm rambling now so before you fall asleep here's the story)



Doctor Darren

Doctor Darren had slept with one of his patients and had felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't.

The guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming.

But every once in a while he'd hear that soothing voice, within himself, trying to reassure him: "Darren, don't worry about it. You aren't the first doctor to sleep with one of their patients and you wont be the last. And you're single. Let it go.........."

But invariably the other voice would bring him back to reality......

"Darren, you're a VET....."



So, as you can see, Dr Barker, too, was in a quandary. What to do? What to do? Hearing a heartfelt moan from the woman she suddenly remembered who and what she was. "Oh God, Ms Dole you do seem to have brought him here just in time." Grabbing her patient by the scruff of the neck, she pulls him off the poor distressed woman, "Don't worry Ms Dole, we'll have him fixed and docile before you know it"

With that Bobby was dragged out of the room. Lindsay took a moment to register what had just been said, but when the implications hit her, an ear splitting, earth shattering, big head exploding scream of

"NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

was heard throughout the whole of the USA.

Even Jewel giggling at her computer half a continent away heard it. (Mind you she was too interested in writing a short 700,000 word installment of soulmates to pay much attention to the noise.)

Jimmy in the waiting room smiled. With Bobby now out of business, maybe Lindsay would be needing what he has to offer. He spied a nice chair with smooth black legs, just like Lindsay's when she wears that short skirt and decided he'd better get in some practice. He really wanted to show her just how rigorous he can be.

Dr Barker giggled with glee and made a rather nasty comment as she dragged the unsuspecting Bobby to her lair.(I can't repeat her comment because I'm sweet and innocent, besides I'm so adorable I wouldn't know a nasty comment if I read one, but I'm sure, knowing evil Ally, it was very, VERY bad) Ally'd never suspected it would be so easy to get her hands on this man and on her birthday of all days. Just wait until she showed him what a real smooootcher she is. And to top it all off, now she doesn't have to kill Lindsay to do it. Or does she?