*~*~*~*

Lindsay's apartment 10p.m.

Lindsay sits on her couch, the same place she has been for the last hour, going over and over again in her mind what happened in Bobby's office. Why? This was the main question she asked herself. The main thought running through her mind. Why? Closely followed by why now? Why tonight? Why did I? Why did he? And then the questions that really scared her began to appear. Why was it so good? Why didn't she stop him? Why didn't she stop herself? Why can she still feel him? Why is she so ... happy? ... Why had it never been like that before? And why was she so afraid it would never be like that again? Why?

The questions repeated themselves over and over in her head. The answer she gave to most was simply, "I don't know!" Sure she'd always liked Bobby. He was a good friend, a very close friend, someone she trusted and respected and ... yeah, even loved a little, but as a friend! Only as a friend! And yes of course she was attracted to him, extremely attracted to him, but that was only because she was female and he's just ... the sexiest most amazing looking, smelling and sounding man she has ever met. But all that doesn't explain why she just did what she just did. Doesn't come close to explaining why level headed Lindsay Dole suddenly, for no reason other than pure lust, had sex with her boss in his office little over two hours ago. And not just sex but the best sex of her life. Sex that in intensity amazed her. Sex that, even now, just thinking about it aroused her. Why?

Not why did thinking about it arouse her, because that answer's obvious, she's human after all. But why did it happen? Why did he get up from his desk and walk over and sit next to her? Why did he sit so close to her? Why did he lean in so close, so close as if to read what was on the notepad on her lap? So close that his breath tickled and warmed her neck. Why did he reach for her notepad only to stop when his hand touched her thigh? Why did this touch, barely present, cause her to breathe in so sharply and turn her head until her eyes met his? And why was it that the last rational thought she had was "Oh God yes!" before their lips met hungrily and his hand flew from her thigh to her breast and she slowly lowered herself backward onto the couch gripping him to her in case he did not follow? But he did! Oh God he did! Thank God he did!

Lindsay shakes her head and admonishes herself 'thinking like this doesn't help'. She has to stop thinking about what they did and work out why they did it. Why is the important question. Why did Bobby come over to her? Why did he want to see what she was working on? And why was she even in his office in the first place? Yeah why? Good question. Why? She remembers sitting at her desk. It was almost eight o'clock and everyone else had gone for the day. She was frustrated with her lack of progress on her case. Her notepad was staring up at her blank. Taunting her. She looked up and saw him through the window working diligently at his desk. She sighed and thought, 'At least one of us is getting somewhere tonight'. At that moment he looked up, caught her eye and smiled. "That's it!" she says loudly, "It was the smile." It drew her to him. Without thinking she picked up her pen and notepad and headed into his office. Planning only to work there. Hoping only his presence and their connection would help her work.

"Tough going?" he asked as she came in.

"Yeah" she sighed flopping onto the couch.

Notepad on lap pen poised ready for inspiration she sat there. She didn't even look at him. She just sort of, felt it, when he rose from his desk. And felt it with each step as he came closer. It was ridiculous. They'd worked together at night so many times. Nothing like this had ever happened before. She hadn't even really ever considered it happening. It's not like she fantasized about him or anything. Not often anyway. So why did it happen? Why now? Why tonight did each step he took cause her body to throb? Why did she know, as soon as he began to move towards her, that nothing would be put on that notepad tonight? Why did the room suddenly become stiflingly hot and crowded with each deliberate step he took? Why did breathing become so hard? So hard that each breath she took was exaggerated. Each breath she took was so loud it could have drowned out a symphony orchestra. Why did the movement of the couch as it took his weight cause her legs to go numb? And why did the feel of his hand on her thigh bring all feeling back to her legs so quickly the sensation was overwhelming? And most importantly why did she kiss him and drag him down on top of her and claw so desperately at his clothes and his skin? And why did she call out his name so loudly and so intensely as he thrust into her? And why could she not stop thinking about it? How was she supposed to work this out when her mind won't stop thinking about it? Why! Think about why! Not it! Not the sex! Just why! She told herself angrily. Why?

She stands up and begins pacing. It's easier to think when pacing. Backwards and forwards. Backwards and forwards she goes all the while thinking, Why? Why? Why? She sits down again. It's no use. She doesn't know the answer. She doesn't know why. Not why she did it and certainly not why he did it. And not why when it was over, when they were finished, she calmly got up, put on her clothes and walked out. Just walked out without even a word ... Why? ... It just seemed easier that way. No. Honestly it was because it was too scary to stay. To stay they would have eventually had to talk. And the only thing she knew for sure at that moment was she wasn't ready to talk. She didn't want to talk yet. At that moment she just wanted to feel. She didn't want her head back. She didn't want thoughts back so she left. She left and came home to feel. To just feel all the pleasure and satisfaction and joy and ... even security and she did. She felt all that until the dreaded word popped up. That word that now tormented her: why? And then the thoughts returned. Memory and sensation suddenly overpowered by thoughts and uncertainty and apprehension. An apprehension that builds to fever pitch, that threatens to totally consume her when a knock at her door startles her ... It's after ten ... It could only be one person ... It could only be him, Bobby! ... He's come to talk ... Why?

Lindsay nervously heads to the door and opens it slowly.

"Bobby! Hi" she says pretending to be surprised. Hoping she appears calm, relaxed and ... normal.

"Can I come in?"

"Sure"

He walks past her into the apartment. He walks directly to the couch and sits down. She follows and sits down next to him. Neither one speaks to or looks at the other. Lindsay, nervously, plays with her fingers and clenches her jaw. Bobby sits there with his hands on his knees one finger nervously tapping. Eventually he takes a deep breath, stands up and blurts out,

"Look ... Lindsay I just came over to say I'm sorry. It was an incredibly stupid thing to do ... I promise it will never happen again. If ... if you do decide you have to leave ... I'll ... I'll understand. I will. But let me just say I promise it won't ever happen again ... and I'm truly sorry." Having said all he came to say he turns and heads for the door. Eager to leave.

"Bobby wait!"

He stops with one hand on the doorknob. He looks back at her terrified. Ready for her to start in on him. Ready for the worst.

"Look ... firstly, Bobby, you have nothing to be sorry about."

"But..."

"No Bobby shush. Just let me say what I need to say" she walks towards him "Let me finish before you speak."

"Ok"

"I totally agree with you ... what happened tonight was stupid and ... it should never happen again. I'm not exactly sure why it happened tonight but ... I'm definitely not sorry it did."

He looks at her intrigued. She gives him a shy smile and continues,

"What I am trying to say is, it was something we needed ... we both needed ... tonight ... and I agree it should never happen again. It will never happen again! It just wouldn't be right for us to do that ... again ... but I'm glad we did it tonight. I'm not sorry we did and neither should you be ... Bobby you didn't do anything wrong ... You have nothing at all to apologize for!"

She ignores the suggestive grin appearing on his face and continues,

"I'm not going anywhere Bobby. I'm not going to leave because of this."

"Good" he says relieved "Because I need you ... I mean ... the firm ... we need you."

She laughs "I knew what you meant Bobby."

"So we're ok?"

"Yeah we're ok"

"Good"

They stand there, smiling and staring at one another. The tension and apprehension that filled the room when he first arrived is now gone and has been replaced by a relaxed comfort. An easy friendship. An understanding.

"So are you going or staying?" she laughs looking at his hand still holding the doorknob.

"I'm going" he laughs and opens the door "Night Lindsay."

"Goodnight"

He begins to walk out the door but stops, turns around and says, "Oh and ... thanks".

She smiles at him unsure what exactly he is thanking her for. She looks up into his eyes and when their eyes meet, for the second time that night, Bobby acts in a way even hours later when he is laying in her bed with her asleep in his arms, he doesn't know why he did. He shuts the door, takes her in his arms and kisses her. Not just a soft friendly kiss, not even a passionate kiss, but a kiss so deep, so hungry, so desperate he devours her. Their mouths, their lips and tongues thrusting, searching, claiming each other while hands tear at clothes frantic to get to skin. He kisses her, ravaging her whilst in turn she kisses him. Kisses him with equal fervor and guides him to her room. A trail of clothes the evidence of their hasty journey.

*~*~*~*



Bobby is flat on his back his arms draped around Lindsay stroking her back. She lays across him her head resting on his chest while her left hand lazily caresses it and her right plays with his hair.

"Shit Lindsay I came over to apologize." He says breathlessly "I just wanted to say I was sorry."

Lindsay raises herself up and looks into his eyes. Her left hand begins playing with his hair "And it was some apology too Bobby!"

His eyes close and he moans thinking about it "Yeah it was wasn't it!" he whispers. He opens his eyes to see her grinning at him "What?"

"So do you think you might be sorry again tomorrow night?" she asks slyly.

He laughs and rolls her over in a move so sudden it takes her by complete surprise and makes her shriek.

"I'm already sorry again," he says before kissing her.

"Oh my..." is all the reply she manages until at last he releases her mouth "... this can't be good" she stammers.

He grins at her "Is that a challenge?"

Her finger traces his lip as they stare into one another's eyes, "Yeah" she says slowly nodding, before reaching her hand up behind his head and pulling his mouth down to meet hers again.

And this time Bobby knows exactly why he kisses her.