ALWAYS EVERYWHERE   by Greeboina

Sean looked up when he heard a laughter flowing through the room. His heart trembled and he looked down again. He had to forget about her. It would never work.
“Sean…”
He looked up and met the blue eyes of his bass player and friend. He had seen him looking and he knew why. He looked down again and muttered a ‘hello’.
“Are you ever going to do something about it?”

Nicky sat down in front of him. They were on a café near H&N and they were having a break from meetings and plans of the new tour. Sean had hoped and feared that she would be here. He wanted to see her but it also hurt him. Knowing that the chance of her wanting anything from him was slim. He was older and she had never shown any interest in him. She had helped Martin with the arrangements of their new tour but she never noticed him. Nicky interrupted his thoughts.

“You really have it bad.”
Sean scowled.
“You can’t hide it from me. Even James noticed it today. Why don’t you go ask her?”
“What should I say? I’ve never spoken to her and she never notices me anyway. She looks at you and
smiles. Even James gets one but she ignores me.”
“Maybe she likes you too…”
“No Nicky”, he sighed and continued: “I’m too old for her and I’m divorced and got a kid. She…It wouldn’t work”
“Oh hello Cis!”

Nicky smiled as a young woman came to their table. She was a curvy redhead and with a sparkle in her eyes. She had worked for H&N for a year now and was helping Martin and Terri right now with planning and arranging Manics forth coming tour. Sean had fallen for her the first time he saw her but had been too afraid to do anything about it. She was younger than him and deserved better. Nicky had been goading him to do something about it but Sean refused.

Nicky was speaking to her and she was laughing at his little jokes. Sean looked at her secretly. She was beautiful when she was laughing and her smile made his stomach twist. Suddenly she looked him into the eyes and smiled.
“Hey Sean”
“Hey..”

Sean fiddled with his cup and looked down. He could feel Nicky staring at him and demanding him to do something. He heard Nicky sigh but then heard him saying:
“I just have to go get some more tea. Please entertain Sean while I’m away Cis”
The last glimpse Sean got of Nicky was him winking to him and giving him a shit eating grin. That bloody bastard! Sean smiled and looked up again.

“So erm…you like working for Martin?”
She smiled and was it him or was she looking a bit nervous too?
“Yes. I really like working here. People are very nice and have made me feel at home here.”
Then silence. Sean was fiddling his mug again and tried getting the courage to ask her out. He looked up and…
“I know we haven’t talked much but…”

She smiled nervously and then after biting her lip, looked him into the eyes:
“But I was wondering if… you would like to have dinner with me?”
Sean looked at her dumbstruck. Did he just hear her saying that she wanted dinner with him? He smiled shakily.
“I would love to…”
They both looked down but this time the silence had an edge of something like happiness?
“Erm…tomorrow night at my place? I could make something or we could order?”
“Yeah, I would love to…”

Nothing was said until Nicky came back with a pot of tea. Cis got up and let him get his seat again.
“I better go back to the others. See you Sean…”
Nicky looked at him with a grin.
“Well well well…”
“Shut it Wire!”
“If you could see yourself! If ever I’ve seen a more love struck man before.”
“I warn you Nicky!”

They finished the tea Nicky had bought but drank it in silence. Sean was getting very annoyed with his friend. Every time he looked at where Cis and her friends were he could see Nicky grinning.  Once his eyes met hers and he smiled. She smiled back and then looked at her friend next to her. His heart was beating and he felt almost sick. He hadn’t felt this since he was a teenager and met Rhian. He looked at Nicky.

“One word Wire and we’ll need a new bass player!”
He got up and took his coat. Nicky smiled and waved to Cis and the others. Sean smiled and she gave him a little smile too. They got outside and then he heard Nicky laughing.
“Nick…”
“Sorry Sean but you should see yourself!”, he chuckled, “You are both very infatuated with each other.”
Sean scowled again but inside Nicky’s last word ran through him. She liked him?

The rest of the day Sean was in his own world. The others asked what was wrong but they got no answer. Nicky was smiling all the time but refused to tell why. Then the meeting ended. Sean said ‘goodbye’ and waited for Nicky to finish. He had promised to drive him home even though he regretted it now. Nicky said goodbye to James and then they went to Sean’s car.

“Oh Sean?”
He turned around when he heard someone calling his name. Cis was walking towards him. He waited for her while his heart jumped at seeing her.
“I forgot to give you my address.”
She blushed and smiled while trying not look at him.
“Erm tomorrow at 8pm? If you bring wine?”
Sean nodded and said:
“No probs,”
Smiled a little bit sheepishly and took her note. Their fingers touched and they both reacted quickly by taking their hands away as if they had been burned.
“Erm…see you tomorrow then.”
“Yes. 8pm.”

Sean went to his car and looked at Nicky with a warning.
“Not one word…”
Nicky wisely said nothing but he was smiling all the way to Newport.

Sean opened the door to his apartment and was greeted with a ‘Daaaddy!”. He smiled and picked up his daughter Matilda.

“Tilly! What are you doing here?”
“She wanted to say hello and I phoned Nicky and he said you were on your way.”
Rhian, his now ex-wife stood in the door to the kitchen smiled. He smiled and put Matilda down again. She grabbed his hand and they followed Rhian to the kitchen. Sean smiled as he saw she had made tea. Tilly grabbed her cup of milk and after she and Sean had decided what she should watch, he went back to the kitchen. Rhian gave him his mug and they went to the sofa. They had divorced three years ago but they had stayed friends. They watched Tilly’s happy face as she watched the latest adventures of her favourite cartoon characters before Rhian broke the silence.

“So what’s this about you having a date?”
“Nicky that cheeky…”
Sean sighed as he saw his ex-wife little teasing smile.
“Alright I got a date.”
“And with Cis. About time wasn’t it?”
He looked up and met her teasing eyes.
“What?”
“Come on Sean. I’m not blind. The first time you saw her and you were head over heels.”

Sean opened his mouth to protest but closed it. She was right. The second he had laid his eyes on her he had fallen for her. He blushed and looked down. The silence was broken when Tilly came and tucked at her dad’s sleeve. He smiled and looked down at her.
“Yes sweetie?”
She smiled her most charming smile and he laughed.
“Come on then you little troll.”

He got up and went to the kitchen. While he took the cookie box from the cupboard in the ktichen he heard how Rhian laughed.
“You are so in her power.”
He laughed and gave his daughter a cookie. She smiled to him, kissed him on the cheek and ran back to where she had been sitting before. He took the plate where he had added some cookies too and placed in on the table in front of his still giggling wife. She then sobered up and looked at him.

“I’m happy for you Sean.  Cis is perfect for you. No ‘buts’! Your excuse with being older than her, divorced and having a kid doesn’t matter to her. She adores Matilda and she have had a crush on you for ages.”

Rhian smiled and then got up. Tilly was watching her cartoon and Rhian looked at Sean.
“You want to stay here tonight, honey?”
Tilly looked away from the telly, jumped up and ran to her dad.
“Can I daddy?”
“Of course sweetie!”

Rhian said goodbye and they waved to her as she left. Then Sean started preparing dinner while Matilda helped him as much as she could. Soon his daughter took his thoughts of his date tomorrow.

The next day Sean was a nervous wreck. He had tried sitting down to write some music but he couldn’t concentrate. The thoughts of the dinner tonight was making him nervous and excited. He decided to sit down and watch some telly. He knew it wouldn’t take his mind of Cis but at least it was worth trying. The hours went slowly but finally it was time to go He checked he had the wine and went to grab his jacket. Suddenly his mobile rang and he saw it was Cis. He felt his stomach turning. This could just mean she wanted him to pick something up. Nothing bad.

“Hey Cis”
“Sorry Sean but…”
She coughed,
“…but I have to cancel our date.”
Her voice sounded thick and she as quite nasal.
“Are you okay?”
Sean was worried. Never mind the cancelled date. As long as she was alright.

“I’m stuck with the flue. I’m so sorry Sean. I thought it would be better but I was wrong.”
“It’s okay. I can get you something?”
“Don’t have to Sean. I don’t want to make you sick too.”

She sounded really disappointed. She assured him that she would be okay and they hang up. Sean sat down on the sofa and sighed. He turned the TV on and tried to hide his huge disappointment. He had really looked forward tonight. At least they had another date soon. He smiled.

A week later and Sean was on his way to Cis. She hadn’t been at work before Thursday. She had still looked a bit tired but her spirit was as always cheeky and warm. They had talked for a bit and had arranged everything for their date. James and Nicky had teased him merciless when they noticed him smiling but he shrugged it off. When he drove home he was humming to ‘Strict Machine’ and grinned. Somehow that song remained him of Cis.

This time she hadn’t cancelled and he was really looking forward to it. He was driving along the road when suddenly a car drove out and hit his car. Luckily Sean was wearing his seatbelt as always and the car had hit the other side. He was shocked though and got out from the car shakily. The other driver was just as shocked. People ran out from a house and someone called after an ambulance as the other driver was bleeding. Before long they had arrived and they were both hurried to the hospital. Luckily he wasn’t hurt and was advised to go home and rest. He called Cis but couldn’t get through. He then called his mum, Rhian and James and told what had happened. After telling them he was alright he had asked James if he could call Cis and explain. He really needed to sleep suddenly. The shock had been big and everything had went so fast. He got a taxi and got home. He took some painkillers and went to his bedroom. Before he fell asleep he thought of Cis.

It was like they were cursed. When Sean had gotten over the accident, they had to do promotion and he never saw Cis. She was busy arranging and was always busy. Sean was not happy. James had told him she had been shocked and he had had to calm her down. She had hugged him when she saw him for the first time after the accident but had to excuse herself again because of an appointment. Since then it had only been hellos and smiles. He missed her and he desperately wanted to talk to her. Just talk to her and be with her. James was worried about him but didn’t say anything. His cousin was pining but he had also seen the looks Cis sent his cousin. He wasn’t the only one. In the end he had enough and got the others together. They agreed that something had to be done. Martin and James worked out a plan. Sean would get a message about a meeting and Cis would too. It would only those two. Terri arranged everything and Nicky helped her.

Sean got in H&N and wondered what was up. He had gotten an email about a meeting at 1pm today. He hoped it wasn’t anything too serious! He got down the hall and turned left. He walked past Cis’s office. For a split second he thought of going in there but he didn’t want to be late. He opened the door to Martin’s office but no-one was there except…Cis. They both looked at each other. Sean just stared at her but inside his heart was jumping for joy. She was fiddling with some papers and nearly jumped when the phone rang. She took it and turned the speaker on almost right away so Sean could listen too.

“Sean there?”
“Yes. He just…arrived.”
It was James.  He sounded very cheery.
“Good. Now you two can talk even though kissing would be much better.”
Sean blushed slightly and looked at Cis. She smiled very shyly.
“Have fun cousin and you too, Cis.”

He hang up. They both didn’t know what to say but were both smiling. But then Sean walked to her and took her hand. He looked at her and she looked at him. He brushed a lock of her eyes away and smiled. His hand stayed on her cheek and his thumb was gently stroking it. She had closed her eyes and suddenly they were both standing very close to each other.

“Sounded like it was an order.”
She giggled and looked at him.
“What are you waiting for?”
He kissed her.



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