Many of us grew up with the McDonaldland characters, and I'm talking about the original ones, before those creepy McNuggets and that stoned bird, which I will never understand. Okay, Mayor McCheese, Big Mac, all characters based on actual food available at McDonalds...but where did this stupid bird come from? This is all beside the point, however. We are all familiar with Grimace and all the rest, but things are changing ever so subtly over the years. First, read this from The Onion, America's Finest News Source.
> Hamburglar Urges Senate Subcommittee To 'Robble Robble Robble'
> WASHINGTON, DC--Denouncing a prison system he described as
"robble,"
> hamburger advocate and convicted felon Hamburglar addressed the Senate
> Subcommittee on Penal Reform Monday, demanding more humane conditions
> for the nation's inmates. "Robble robble robble robble robble robble
> robble robble robble robble robble robble," an emotional Hamburglar
told
> the 12-member committee. "Robble robble robble robble robble. Robble
> robble robble robble robble robble: Robble robble." Reaction to the
> speech was mixed. "Certainly there is room for improvement in our
penal
> system," U.S. Sen. Bob Smith (R-NH) said. "But I would hardly call
the
> current situation 'robble.'"
> (copyright 1999 The Onion)
The timing on this pseudo-news piece is almost uncanny. You see, I saw a McDonalds commercial over the weekend that just happened to feature the Hamburglar. Except for one drastic change...he TALKED. That's right, normal words. What happened? Was his former speech impediment offensive to some tiny special interest group? Was the "old" Hamburglar not p.c. enough? I think that was one of the seven signs of the Apocalypse, wasn't it? "The waters of the world shall boil, and the thief of pan-fried cow gristle shall speak the language of men". Nope, I don't like it. What's next? With all these changes I feel like my childhood is slipping away.
Does anyone else remember The Great Space Coaster? I can still hear the theme song in my head. Who could ever forget that guy with the huge ultra-curly blond hair (did anyone else think maybe that was a wig?), and "no gnews is good gnews with Gary Gnu". We had such cool, yet lame, cartoons. Thundarr the Barbarian, anyone? Or, going pretty far back for some of us, the live action Ultraman series? And of course the obligatory parade of Hanna-Barbera crap, like Scooby Doo and the Jetsons. These cartoons were never intended for kids, why can't anyone admit that? Look at Scooby Doo for some perfect examples. Shaggy was a stoner if I ever saw one, come ON. And those skirts that Daphne wore, I've seen less leg exposed on the surgery channel. I saw part of one show a couple days ago, where it was winter and the gang was all bundled up, and Daphne was complaining about the cold temperature. Maybe because you're still wearing that barely legal skirt! How old were these "kids" supposed to be, anyway? Where were their parents? And Velma, I'm sorry, "comfortable shoes", that's all I'll say about that. Not that there's anything wrong with that, mind you, but there's no way any of these characters would fly on a modern cartoon. The special interest groups would jump all over this stuff.
Our generation also had Underdog, a super hero canine who got his super powers from popping pills. We had the Sunbow shows, GI Joe and The Transformers. The DIC shows were usually pretty exceptional, like MASK and Inspector Gadget (a series some of us watched LONG before the movie). Some of us caught the early wave of Japanese cartoons, like Voltron and Battle of the Planets, both of which have been re-vamped for the '90's. There were Smurfs (I think Smurfette got her wardrobe tips from Daphne) and the bizarre Noozles. Then there was the brief wave of video game inspired shows like Pole Position, Donkey Kong, and Pac Man. And there was plenty that I'm sure most of us would rather forget. The Super Mario Brothers Super Show is a great example of a show I wish I could forget. On top of terrible, terrible animation, viewers had to endure the live action vignettes at the beginning and end of each show, with that loud guy who used to be a manager in the WWF or something and used to hang out with Cyndi Lauper a lot.
And there was also one of my personal faves, The Muppet Show. How this show managed to get a chance in a prime time slot, I'll never know, but even seeing some of them now as an adult, they're still funny. Great characters, intentionally hammy writing, and an appealing low budget feel made this show a stand-out. I don't get to see The Muppet Show anymore, but having a daughter now I do catch the occasional Sesame Street. I don't care what anyone else says about Elmo, or Cookie Monster, or Kermit (he's not on much anymore), or whatever...Ernie has always been and is still my favorite character. Say what you will about his live-in relationship with Bert, I don't care, Ernie is the best. And he's interesting on that show because he's one of the few "ageless" characters. Elmo and Zoe are like young children, and Big Bird and Snuffelupagus are both simple-minded enough to be considered young children. Grover is definitely geared towards the really younger kids, the way he talks to the camera and other kids on the show, and Cookie Monster is just Cookie Monster. But Ernie and Bert are almost like grown ups, or at least older teenagers. They don't talk down to the audience, like most of the other characters do. Plus, Ernie gets to sing some pretty cool songs.
And does anyone else out there remember a series called The Seven Cities of Gold? I only ever saw it on Nickelodeon, but I've never seen anything about it since. That used to be one of my favorite shows. I'll admit, I wasn't very popular, and I was a bit of a TV junkie, but I'm unrepentant, do you hear me?
(copyright 1999 mdl)