La fleur de l'amour

Celine: O no Rena what will I tell François, I'm carrying Bowmans' child!

Rena: O my! You mustn't tell a soul!

Celine: I love François but I'm in love with Bowman

Rena: François is your cousin!

Celine: So François is my cousin, so what?

Rena: That's just wrong Celine...

Celine: I can't help myself if he's hot!

Rena: He's actually pretty ugly...

Celine: But the way we make love, it's so wrong it's right!

Rena: What about Bowman, what would his wife think?

Celine: *goes to the bar table and gets a drink* I don't care! Bowman is my man!

Rena: Didn't you say François was your man? The way you make love to him

Celine: Ya, I'm a slut, what you expect

Rena: Celine... You have real issues

Celine: *takes a sip of her drink* That's how I like them to be

Rena: Oh my...

Celine: What would Bowman think? I'm carrying his child

Rena: Are you sure it's his child your carrying?

Celine: You're right it could be François! O dear this Child won't have a father!

Rena: Give it to a poor woman, who would even think of us taking care of rotten children

Celine: Why don't I just sell it...

Rena: I think maybe, why not hire some maid or something to take care of it

Celine: Splendid Idea!

François: *walks in* I'm ready for our date Celine darling

Celine: Right, To Les Anneaux

Rena: *whispers to Celine* Why don't you tell him

Celine: *shakes head* Let's Go! *Her and François depart*

Rena: O dear *scene fades*

*Screen Appears to Bowmans' Chateau*

Bowman: Ahhh... Another day, can't wait to make some love to Celine

Wife: What did you say Bowman?

Bowman: Nothing dear...

Wife: Let's make love *takes off housecoat and is wearing black skimpy outfit*

Lights: *lower and make-out music appears*

Bowman: I love you dear

Wife: *sits on bed*

Bowman: You always know how to make me happy

Wife: Shut up already!

Bowman: Yes dear...

*Screen fades*

*Screen Appears at Hospital*

Ernest: *in hospital bed having a coma*

Opera: O no Ernest my love! Why did you have to get in that limo ascendant!

Nurse: he might not make it

Opera: It cant be true!!

Ernest: *barely breathing*

Nurse: We will just have to pray for him

Opera: ERNEST!!

Director: NO! YOU'RE STILL IN THE COMA!

Ernest: oops *goes back to acting*

Nurse: If you give us money we can make him all better

Opera: But hes just faking it

Nurse: *points to script*

Opera: Ah... How much?

Ernest: *coughs and pretends he didnt*

Director: Let's just cut to commercials

*screen fades to commercial one*

person: Salad is so good! Try our latest Salad From Salad is Yum! It's New Octopus, Fish brains Salad! Salad is Yummyful!

*screen fades to the last commercial*

Person: Try this new Low fat Poutine, with article everything because poutine is so high in fat! Only at Poutine Palace *screen fades back to La Fleur de l'eau*

Opera: *eating the new salad from the commerical* Yumm

Nurse: *gags*

Director: *points to camera*

Opera: *nods* How much to save his life?!

Nurse: It would be $5000 Can

Opera: That’s nothing! My rich daddy is a lawyer

*screen fades and goes to Celines' date*

François : What's wrong, you haven't eaten your food and you haven't talked much

Celine: Oh I was just thinking...

François: Of what?

Celine: *leans over the table* If I had a child would you support me?

François: Of course, it would be my child wouldnt it?

Celine: Yes, and I'm carrying your child

François: Wow a father at 13 years of age! And its better having it with your cousin

Celine: yes…

François: Lets make love after this date

Celine: Sure we can

François: Now you can have twins

Celine: How great...

Waiter: What would you like to have?

Celine: Finest champagne and the la bifteck

François: I'll have jus de raison et Le dinde

Waiter: Sure *goes to the kitchen*

François: I can get Rosa My maid to take care of the child, too dumb to take care of it ourselves!

Celine: I quite agree, but it would be nice to hire a maid too (Thats when we can come in and screw it over, if we want people can fall in with us)

François: Hmmm....

Waiter: *comes back and sets food down*

Celine: Ya! Food!

François: remember your feeding my child!

*screen disappears and enters on Bowmans Chateau*

Bowman: That’s was amazing

Wife: I'm carrying your child! *falls asleep*

Bowman: How special...

Wife: *snores*

Bowman: =S

*screen fades again*

*screen appears at Chisatos' Mansion*

Chisato: This little tape will make me get him, I'm sure François would be very mad at Celine would cheat on him

*break ends*

*screen appears in hospital*

Director: ERNEST FOR THE LAST TIME YOUR IN THE COMA! THAT’S IT YOU'RE FIRED!

Noel: *fills in for Ernest*

Opera: um…

Opera: You dont looks like Ernie...

Noel: ...

Nurse: Uhhh... what was the question?

Opera: How much to save No- Ernest... *shrugs*

Director: your people are giving me a headache! That’s it your scene will be scratched out!

*screen disappears and re-appears in Bowman's Chateau*

phone: *rings*

Bowman: Hello, who is this

Celine: Me hunny

Bowman: You... Uhhh...

Celine: Wanna come over?

Bowman: What will I tell my wife?

Celine: That you're going to get her some roses

Bowman: alright, I'll be over there love

*screen goes to Celines bedroom*

François: Who did you call honey, come on lets make love!

Celine: Uhhh... François, maybe later... you need to go now, Bye!

François: *is pushed out*

Celine: Why did I have that sudden urge...?

Bowman: *knocks on door*

Celine: come in *goes in her bed as she takes off her housecoat*

Bowman: *enters as he goes to the bed and they start doing dirty things*

*screen appears outside Celines mansion*

Chisato: François, I have something for you *hands him the tape*

François: What is this

Chisato: *runs off*

François: BUT WHAT IS IT?!

*screen appears on François's Bedroom*

François: *puts on tape* O MY! HOW COULD SHE!

Phone: *rings*

François: Hello, Chisato?

Chisato: Hi would you like to go on a date with me?

François: I cant right now

Chisato: Why not?

François: *hangs up*

Narrator: Next time on la fleur de l'amour

Director: Noel you are supposed to be in a coma! *looks at cameraman* STOP TAPING THIS!

Celine: How dear you steal my man!

Wife: I'm carrying you child and you do this!

Part 2

Wife: *wakes* Where is Bowman *looks at table and reads note*

Note: At Celine's buying you roses

Wife: That husband stealer! *dresses and goes to Celine's*

*Screen fades and appears in Celine's Bedroom with her and Bowman*

Celine: Bowman, you dont have any others in your life... RIGHT?

Bowman: sureee...

Wife: *runs in* BOWMAN!!

Bowman: O_O *runs out*

Wife: I'm carrying your child and you do this!

Celine: What! I'm carrying his child as well, I think

Wife: You little ho! You don't know your unborn child's father *slaps Celine*

Celine: *falls over and slaps wife as the cat fight begins*

Bowman: ITS NOT MY FAULT!!

Celine: I blame it on Bowman...

Wife: IM KILLING HIM!!

Celine: NOT IF I DO FIRST!

Bowman: eep *runs*

Chisato and Francois: *walks in holding hands*

Celine: How dare you steal my man!

Celine: BUT YOUR MINE!

Chisato: You have Bowman...

Wife: BOWMAN IS MINE!

François: O_o Im outta here *runs out*

Chisato, Celine, Wife: *get in a huge cat fight*

Wife: lets kill her she stole our men!

Chisato: Deal *gets out a gun*

Celine: NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOO

Celine: *dies*

Wife: Bowman o/~

François: Ok then... *goes to Chisato*

Chisato: *thumbs up*

*Screen fades*

Director: Good acting!

Celine: *gets up* Glad this is just acting and I don't have to die for real

Cutepiku, Chinchilla and rEeBi: *start having a bon fire in the studio*

Cutepiku: *throws in some of the junk from her basement* They didnt want to sell it in a garage sale, so I AM BURNING IT!!

rEeBi: You DO have alot of junk...

Chinchilla: *throws in random articles of pointless junk no one needs to know about*

*bonfire grows*

Cutepiku: This fire is so nice

Chinchilla: opps you did it again! *laughs*

rEeBi: NNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOO